Page 64 of Eternal Ruin

He must have felt the same urge because how else could he describe it so perfectly? Dizzying warmth built and rose inside Kidan, and she had to let it run its course or she’d explode. It was sudden, silly, and something she knew as a child for a brief time. Wonder broke through her.

Still, she resisted.

“What did Samson say to you?” Susenyos asked, his voice mixing with the music. It ruined the rhythm, jolted her into reality.

Focus. That was why they were in here. To pull secrets out of each other.

She made her voice even. Met his eyes. “To side with him.”

“You wouldn’t,” he said instantly.

Kidan prayed she wouldn’t. “Kill him. If you don’t want me to side with him, kill him.”

There was an urgency to her tone that she didn’t want.

Surprise sparked in his pupils. “You are tempted.”

It wasn’t a question, but a confirmation. It made her glance away, shame prickling at her.

“Why do you sway so easily?” he asked. Shimmering light fell on the smooth planes of his chest. “Why is it difficult for you to show me loyalty? If you gave me a grain of the devotion you waste on your traitorous sister or your scheming friends, we would be unstoppable.”

His voice was dangerous, a lull she wanted to give in to, desperately, but it morphed in the back of her mind, revealing its hidden layers until a flare of anger stole into her chest.

Herloyalty?

“You left your people behind.” Kidan pushed him back by the chest to breathe easier, but he barely moved, a body carved of stone. “What do you know about loyalty? About being left behind?”

So much for joy. The music and drums died down. Coldness crept in.

Moments like these, she wished for physical strength. To throw him clean across the house and make him understand the pain. His expression was turning.

“You would judge me by a mistake sixty years old? Rot everything we’ve overcome?”

She couldn’t bear to look at the disappointment in his eyes. It was new, being attuned to his pain, a signal she didn’t want to sense. Despite her reluctance, Samson’s words had struck a chord.

Anyone who abandons their family must be punished. That is the only rule I live by.

No—don’t listen to him, she told herself angrily. But so many voices spun in her head, it was exhausting.

Susenyos studied her tired eyes and his voice relented. “Focus on this room. Let joy in.”

The room was pulling at her chest, trying to draw out something vulnerable.

“Just kill him. Please.”

Susenyos watched her for a long moment, and she wondered what he saw. A worthy inheritor? His equal? Or just another Adane who would soon be forgotten?

“Okay, little bird. I’ll get rid of him.”

A breath of relief slid from her lips.

“I’ll make sure he doesn’t come near you,” he promised, and she believed him.

Wanted to believe him wholly.

Something warm and light moved out of her chest then, a golden wisp. The music echoed louder, more persistent, eager, urging her tomove. Joy cocooned them, held their hearts and demanded they dance.

“I’m not doing it.” Kidan crossed her arms, her fingers tapping as the drums pounded. “I won’t.”