Page 113 of Eternal Ruin

He relaxed a little. “She is… distant.”

“Hmm. At least you’re done with your silly games.”

Susenyos huffed an indignant breath. Etete hadn’t found it amusing when Susenyos put Kidan on the roof or coated her room in red dye. He thought it’d been brilliant.

“It’s not like she would have been hurt,” he muttered.

Etete studied the hallway, the flickering bulb. She sighed heavily. “And your people? You took Biruk’s ring and Henok’s comb. Did you see them?”

He smiled. Etete knew every Nefrasi artifact and whom it belonged to alongside him, cleaned them just as he did. “Yes.”

“How did it feel seeing them again?”

This time, his smile was wide, proud. “Better than I imagined.”

The hallway transformed, swirling with the taste of artifacts and power.

“But I might have to do something,” he said, unable to meet her deep eyes. “To earn them all back, I might have to leave behind Adane House.”

Etete thought for a moment. Susenyos wondered if she knew what he meant.

Kidan’s life could give him everything he’d lost sixty years ago.

He had known her for only a few months. The Nefrasi had been ingrained tohis soul for two hundred years. Logic demanded he hand her over to Arin right now. With Kidan gone, he wouldn’t suffer hunger, he wouldn’t be Mortal Vowed. Or would he damn himself?? Die alongside her?

He still found no way out of this bond.

Susenyos reached into his back pocket and retrieved the letter with no name.

I think I was born to die. Everything I do feels pointless or, worse, hurts those around me. Even the thoughts I believe are good just end up craving blood. There’s something inside me that doesn’t belong. Something solid and sharp-edged that wants out. It wants to destroy and break the world and rearrange it, shatter it entirely just to please me. The more I fight this hunger, the more I lose. It’s taking over my body, my mind, my heart. I can’t stand it. I want quiet and peace. I need to end it myself before it wins. Please, tell me how to stand it all.

Etete took the letter gently and read it, sadness lining her features with each word. “She’s lost but so are you. You stood before Uxlay and vowed to be her companion, don’t leave her now.”

Guilt crowded him. But he was running out of options. Arin would only wait for so long. Susenyos dragged a hand down his face.

“I was worried you’d kill her the night the house took the rest of your immortality.” Etete’s eyes traveled to a hole in the wall as a result of the Nefrasi swords Susenyos had been throwing around in fury. “But you did something I’d never seen you do. You saw her pain before yours. And if you’re patient with her, she’ll begin to do the same for you.”

Susenyos tipped his head forward, a smile tugging at his lips. Etete was always the voice of reason. Always too good.

“Thank you,” he said. “Not just now but all of it… thank you for being my friend.”

Etete was quiet for a while before she laughed softly. The movement made her gray-streaked Afro lightly bounce. “Friend? Yes, I believe you are my friend. I suppose I should thank you for letting me stay in this world.”

He could hear the admiration in her voice, for Uxlay, for vampires.

“Why not be one of us? I could find you a life exchange. Today, if you want—”

She shook her head, and he stopped short.

“It is frightening to live endlessly. To be human is to take death as your companion. I quite like death. I walk hand in hand with him. He waits for me, my ever-loyal servant. You wouldn’t take me away from him, would you?”

Susenyos didn’t understand this. Death was the enemy. You killed it with everything you possessed because it came to whisk you and those you loved into oblivion.

The smell of rotting ground burned his nostrils, his betrothed screaming. His mother’s body attracting the tunnel spiders as he held her corpse.

Death would always be the enemy.

Etete let out a soft sound. Perhaps she was disappointed in him. His skin prickled like it did when he was standing before his father, but no reprimand came.