Page 16 of Entertaining the Earl (Vows in Vauxhall Gardens #2)

S usannah saw Colin conversing with an elderly woman on the other side of the ballroom. There was a distinct resemblance between the two—the same nose and the same mouth. She felt sure this was Colin’s aunt, who knew her parents, although she had never met her in person.

She wondered if she ought to go over and make conversation, and introduce herself—for even though the connection between her and the earl was fake, no one else knew that.

Before she could make her way through the crush of people surrounding the dance floor, the earl had led his aunt from the room, and Susannah was unsure whether or not to follow.

She had found herself feeling increasingly unsure after that kiss.

Her first kiss.

It had been so unexpected, so magical, so mind-blowing…and then she had run off, and now she had no idea how to act around the earl anymore. She hadn’t really known how to act around him before, with his good looks and the way he made her heart race.

She still didn’t really understand why he had kissed her. She presumed the ambiance of the moment, with the fire in the grate and the storm raging outside, had clouded his senses. For there was certainly no way she could inspire within him the same heart-stopping feelings he inspired within her.

He seemed to be pretending like the kiss had never happened, and so she was doing the same. Her parents would surely be furious if they found out about the incident—or they would be thrilled and use it to push the two into marriage.

And while the thought of marrying the earl was an attractive one—far more attractive than she had ever considered marriage to be before—she was not going to force the man to wed her because of a moment of weakness and a single kiss in the library.

Even if she thought that the kiss would play on her mind until her dying breath.

Deciding to take them some refreshment, Susannah collected two glasses of ratafia and then headed toward the exit they had taken into the hallway.

She presumed his aunt wished to sit or take some air, for the ballroom was rather stuffy.

When there was no sight of them in the corridor, she glanced out of the large main doors, which had been left open to allow some air to flow through.

And that was when she saw them—his aunt seated on a stone bench a little way from the door, Colin standing next to her.

And that was when she heard them.

“You must understand my concern, Colin. I’m sure she is a sweet girl, but other than a dowry—which you are not in need of—she would bring nothing to your marriage.

No title, no looks, no contacts in society.

And as for heirs—well, her mother only produced one daughter, so she might not be successful there, either. ”

Realizing she was the topic of the conversation, Susannah shrank back into the shadows, holding the two glasses as best she could and trying not to make a noise.

She saw Colin put his hand to his head and let out an exasperated sigh. “Really, Aunt, you mustn’t—”

“I mean no ill toward the girl, but she must be aware of what society expects from you. At the end of the Season, when you return to your estate, there will be much for you to do—and then it will be time to find a wife. An appropriate wife. Do you understand? ”

Once again, Colin sighed. “I understand what you are saying, Aunt. Rest assured, I have no plans whatsoever to marry Miss Lyttleton.”

Susannah bit her bottom lip to stop herself from making a sound.

Of course, this was not news. And yet it hurt, all the same.

After that kiss… Oh, who was she kidding?

Before the kiss. Her feelings had not remained false.

But it seemed that his had. She knew she shouldn’t have been surprised by it, or hurt by it… but she was.

She knew she ought to return to the ballroom, to pretend she had heard nothing, that her heart was not aching, but she could not tear herself away.

“You’re not?” his aunt asked, surprise in her voice. “But surely you are aware of the impression—”

Colin glanced around, seemingly checking to make sure no one was listening, and Susannah stepped further back so she could still hear him but could not see him and did not risk him seeing her.

“I am aware of the impression I am giving, Aunt. As is Miss Lyttleton. Do not concern yourself.”

“I see. But—” It seemed that his aunt was keen to ask further questions, but Colin cut her off.

“Our absence will be noted, Aunt,” he said. “Please allow me to escort you back into the ballroom.”

Susannah hurried back inside so quickly that she very nearly tripped and fell on her face, only catching herself in the nick of time. The contents of the two glasses sloshed around, spilling on the floor, and she handed them to a bemused-looking footman before rushing to the powder room.

She did not want Colin to see her upset. Or anyone else, for that matter. She did not want to explain why she was hurting. That she was a foolish girl who had fallen for a lie. A lie she had told herself. A lie that she had known full well would never become truth.

And yet…there had been moments where she had almost believed th at this thing between them was real. When he had stood up for her, when he had gone out of his way to make her happy, when he had kissed her.

He had no plans to marry her. Of course, he didn’t. He was the handsome and enigmatic Earl of Bourne, who could have any woman he chose.

And she was the plain, on-the-shelf spinster—the wallflower Miss Lyttleton with a large dowry and no family connections.

And as he had told his aunt: she was well aware that none of this was real.

So how on earth had she let herself begin to believe it?