Page 10 of Endlessly Yours (The Wilder Brothers #10)

CHAPTER FIVE

brOOKS

“I t’s about time you’re back,” Wyatt said as he reached around to grip my shoulder. “While you doing most of the heavy lifting over at the new property is good for me, we’ve missed you around here.”

I raised a brow at my brother. “Are you saying that because you actually missed me here on property or the fact that I cook more than you?”

Wyatt put his hand over his chest and staggered back dramatically. “How dare you. I like your presence.”

“You like his enchiladas more,” Ava teased as she came forward and pushed her husband out of the way. Then she wrapped her arms around my neck and slapped a noisy, wet kiss on my cheek.

Feeling far more lighthearted than I had been in over a month, I circled my arms around her waist and spun my sister-in-law in the air.

“I do make a good green chili enchilada.”

“Yes, you do. I’ve missed them so. I realized that I can cook, and Wyatt and I do take turns in the kitchen, but I do enjoy it when you’re the one who cooks for us.

” She fluttered her eyelashes as I set her down on the ground.

“What do you say? Will you be our third? It would really help things in the chores department.”

Elliot, my cousin, burst out laughing next to us. “Oh, please. Please make this happen. First, I wouldn’t be the only triad in the family anymore, and it would annoy Wyatt to no end.”

“Did you just proposition my brother?” Wyatt asked, a glare on his face.

My lips twitching, I covered my mouth with my hand and pretended to scratch at my week-old beard.

I should probably shave, but my beard grew quickly enough that it was now just at the point where it would be soft again.

Not that it truly mattered who it was soft for.

The only person I had been kissing recently was Rory, and that wasn’t truly that recent.

Nor would it ever happen again, as I continued to remind myself.

Amara hadn’t liked my beard at all. Even when I used oil on it to make it smooth, she hadn’t liked the sensation on her skin.

So, I had usually gone with a completely smooth face for her. I hadn’t minded, because Amara never asked for much. I swallowed hard, thinking of her final ask of me. Well, she didn’t usually ask for much. Asking me to try again, though? That just wasn’t going to happen.

When Rory’s face popped into my mind at that very instant, I held back a scowl.

There was no reason to be thinking of Rory in that context. Just because we had slept together, didn’t mean it would happen again.

As it was, the anniversary of losing Amara and, subsequently, the anniversary of sleeping with Rory had passed in the month that I had been gone. None of my family had mentioned it because they knew me well enough to even go down that path.

The first anniversary that I had spent with my family, each of them had tried to say something, though there was nothing to say. Then, they’d walked away from that and done their best just to be family.

As Wyatt and Elliot began to squabble, I took a step back and stared at my family, wondering exactly how I’d ended up here.

“I don’t actually want to marry him, you jerk. But I do want that enchilada recipe.”

“It’s yours. And I’ll even make them for you sometime. But I’m not marrying you. Sorry. I already did that marriage thing, not doing it again.”

People gave me odd looks, and I shrugged, not wanting to get into it.

I was a widower. I had been for years now.

It wasn’t as if grief just left. Yes, I missed my wife.

But I didn’t think of myself as married any longer.

It had been enough years that it wasn’t as if I woke up and thought she would be by my side every day.

That no longer happened. Sometimes, she’d still be in my dreams, and it would be a daily thing in which we were cooking dinner, perhaps trying to figure out what to go on the grocery list. And she would just be there.

As if no time had passed, and then the guilt would hit. Guilt that I had moved on and perhaps forgotten that she’d been alive this whole time during those years.

Brains were funny things when it came to grief. Because I did miss my wife. I would do anything to have Amara back.

But I wasn’t the same man I’d been when she died, and I didn’t go day by day into my grief, drinking my pain.

I wasn’t ready to move on in terms of getting married and following in my family’s footsteps.

But I wasn’t a sorry excuse for a human being any longer.

The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end, and I turned to see Rory standing there, speaking with Alexis about something.

Had she heard me say I would never marry again?

I hoped so. It would make things easier, wouldn’t it?

To lay that out there, even though there was no way that marriage was ever in the cards for us.

We had had one night, a few kisses, and a few moments of connection.

But now she was my neighbor, a woman trying to raise two kids she didn’t know, and she wasn’t my future. Wasn’t my path.

Someone cleared their throat beside me, and I turned to see Ridge standing there, his face studying me before looking over toward Rory.

“You here to play ball with us?” Ridge asked as he rocked back on his heels.

It was nice to see Ridge so calm, no more of that darkness that had constantly seeped into his waking days. Because when I had been through hell, Ridge had been through his own version. I still couldn’t quite believe that he could walk on two feet, let alone get married and want to start a family.

He had way more balls than I did. Because I wasn’t about to do that.

Hell, not only were all of my cousins married and starting families but all three of my brothers were married.

Wyatt had Faith, Ava’s child from her first marriage, who was right smack in the middle of Cameron and Alice’s ages.

Then there was Gabriel, my rock star of a brother who was not only married and out on tour, but their child Maisie was a year old now.

That still surprised me. Because of all the people settling down in our family, between all of the cousins, Gabriel was never it.

I was now the single Wilder, not married, and I was fine with that.

I forced myself not to look over at Rory.

“Brooks?”

I turned towards Ridge and nodded. “I’m in. Flag football, right? No tackling?”

“We’re way too fucking old to tackle,” my eldest cousin said as Eli came over, Alexis at his side. That meant Rory and Ava were now talking, but this time with a stranger I didn’t recognize.

I glared over at the tall man with longish hair, a big beard, and broad shoulders.

He was tall enough that when he spoke to Rory, he had to hover a bit, angling his shoulders downward so he could hear her. The action made him look as if he were in a possessive hold with her, and I didn’t like it.

I held back a frown, wondering why the hell jealousy even had a foothold in me, but I didn’t care right then.

Because fuck this. Who was that man, and why the hell was he talking to Rory?

“Oh, that’s Callum,” Ridge said, studying my face. “You know, Gabriel’s brother-in-law?”

“Oh,” I remembered now. I’d seen the man here before, and come to think of it, he had been flirting with Rory then, too. Well, fuck this guy.

“Gabriel isn’t here, why is he?”

“Remember? He and I are going to go to a few of those local breweries and distilleries to do some cross-promotion and work on some ideas? He owns that small microbrewery up in Colorado.” Wyatt studied my face, a frown etching his. “You okay?”

I shook off whatever the hell I was feeling, “Oh, I thought he would be here to visit Maisie.”

“Gabriel and Maisie will be here by the end of the week, so it all works out,” Ridge said pointedly. “Are you okay, bro?”

“I’m fine. Just wondering why he was here if his sister wasn’t. Not my business. I guess we’re going to go play ball now?”

“I guess we are,” Wyatt said, drawing out the words.

I flipped him off, grateful the kids weren’t here. In fact, all of them, including Cameron and Alice, were with some of the other Wilders, having a kids’ play day.

More power to all of them for dealing with Cameron. While I knew the girl was breaking inside, and most likely a former ghost of herself, I could hear her screaming at Rory constantly. It took all within me not to rush over to the house next door and try to fix whatever the hell was going on.

Nobody deserved to be yelled at the way Rory was. Cameron had so much spite in her, but I knew it was all because of hurt.

But Rory was hurting right along with her.

As was Alice. But that little tyke was freaking adorable.

She had walked right up to me and asked if I was a Wilder because I apparently had the look of them, in her words.

And I had indeed needed to explain the concept of stranger danger before I had carried her back over to Rory.

Even though the kid was seven years old, she had been small enough to practically fit solidly on my hip, as if she had always been there.

I had always wanted kids. It had been in the plans for me and Amara. But then she hadn’t been able to get pregnant right away, and when we’d finally figured out why, it had been too late.

Now that path was never going to be mine, and I understood it.

I wasn’t going to be a father like the rest of my family was on the verge of becoming.

Then again, Rory hadn’t been a mother up until a month ago.

And now she was an aunt, trying to figure out how to deal with one screaming child and one who looked on the verge of breaking down because she was trying to be so calm and collected.

Or maybe I was just looking too far into it.