Page 81 of Do It For Me

Dante:I don’t want you anymore. Get over it.

Dante:You’re disgusting.

The world crumbles beneath my feet. My head spins, and I’m about to throw up.

When I think it can’t hurt anymore, it does.

I want to scream. I want to die.

Why can’t anybody love me? Why does everyone just use me?

Me:Don’t you ever come looking for me. If you do, I’ll kill you like you just killed me.

I block his number and hurl the phone away. Then I grab my new phone and call my mum. I just want to hear her voice. I just want help.

“Hello?” She sounds like she’s been crying.

“I don’t want this!” I scream. “I can’t go on. I can’t, Mum. I want to die.”

“Mo chroí—”

“You told me to trust him! You said… you said he wouldn’t hurt me. He-he betrayed me, Mum.”

I want to tear my heart out. The pain is unbearable.

“Where are you?” her voice is shaking.

“I want to be with you. I want to live with him. Why doesn’t he want me? What am I supposed to do? How can you live like this?”

“Lana—”

“I don’t want him to hurt my baby. I don’t want to have a daughter. He’s going to touch her like he touched me.”

I don’t want her to live like this. I don’t want them to kill her. I can’t have her. I can’t have a baby.

“Pet, listen to me!”

I need him. I need Dante. I need the man I fell in love with. I need the only one who would’ve done anything for me.

He doesn’t exist.

The Dante I knew doesn’t exist and never has.

“I want it to stop.” My sobs choke me, stealing my breath. “Please, make it stop, Mum.”

“Tell me five things you—”

Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. You were always a fucking liar. All you ever did was use me so you could get between my legs, just like everybody else.

I knew I didn’t have to trust you.

Fucking liar!

I can’t breathe. I can’t hear her anymore. Everything fades to black.

I don’t want to wake up again.

But if I do, I’ll get rid of this baby.