Page 79 of Dirty Salvation

He didn’t allow hard drugs through, no prostitution, hell, if someone so much as snorted an Advil in his territory he wanted a doctor’s note to explain why. He hated hard drugs, had seen the effects of what they could do, and the day he let his town be drawn into that kinda shit would be the day Rider was in his pine box.

An hour later he called it a night. He was gonna put an idea into motion.

How do you protect the one thing you never knew you wanted until it was already broken? Zara was making him think like a pussy in touch with too many of his feelings, but the question remained, could he fix her, help her? He needed todosomething.

He found her in the kitchen, cozy as fuck with Tiny, laughing over a pan of boiling milk. Now Rider was a simple man, clear tastes and wants, and he said what he thought, but he’d never found anything funny about dairy.

He’d done some glaring at Tiny, that giant motherfucker all smiles and winks knowing he was pushing Rider’s buttons, before Rider hooked Zara’s hand, pulling her along with him. He already had her jacket having collected it first, he’d told her to put it on leading her outside to his bike.

“Shoppin’, Zara. You need more shit. Thought you’d wanna choose it yourself this time.”

“I don’t have any money.” she frowned, allowing him to hold the jacket out for her arms to slip into it.

Rider was putting his spare helmet on her head when he said. “I’ll take an IOU.” He had no intention of taking money from her. He chose his arguments well and this wasn’t one.

“Oh. Well. Okay, thanks.” he saw her eyes stray to the gate, she nibbled her lip.

Zara was nervous about leaving.

“There’s nothing to be worried about. I’m with you all the way.”

She laughed and her pale eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the waning day. “Like Superman, but worse, huh?”

Rider winked and threw a leg over his Harley. “Something like that. Lift your leg over here, baby. Careful you don’t touch the pipes, they get hot.”

Rider was hyper aware of Zara on the back of his bike. How good it felt her slim arms wrapped tightly around his waist, hands right near his groin, her little body plastered so close to him he experienced her every inhalation and the way she moved with him on a turn. His heart had pounded at first, before rolling into a steadily heated patter, comforted that she knew what to do after he’d explained that she needed to lean into the turns and not fight the bike, the last thing he needed tonight was to have them both flying across the road at a neck breaking speed.

He was eighty percent sure Zara was about to squeeze the life outta him as he took another turn on the road leading away from the Renegade Souls grounds into town, he cocked his head, eyes still to the road, it wasn’t uncommon for deer to cross at any time, didn’t wanna be killing any bambi’s tonight either.

“Baby, you okay back there?” most of the wind caught his words and her reply was muffled but the repeated tap on his belly told him she was signaling him for something.

He chose a stretch of the deserted highway to pull over to the side, leaving his hazards blinking. “Zara, talk to me, what’s up, you need to take a piss?”

No bathroom break made you shake and Zara was doing some bodily juddering against him, he was off his bike, and cupping her cheek. “Hey now, what’s all this about?” Wide eyes looked up at him.

That glance poleaxed him in the gut. She was spooked.

******

“I think.” A hard inhale of panicked air. “I really think we should go back. I don’t need any more clothes, what I have is more than fine, and----and.” That distress claw took hold of Zara like it wanted to become best enemies. She couldn’t explain it, couldn’t vocalize how she hated the emotion of fearing every-fucking-thing of every-fucking-one. “It's irrational, I know. Look, I can’t do this … I feel uneasy like my heart is going to explode out of my chest, Rider. I want to go back."

Her panic attack was always louder than logic.

"Zara. Look at me," she was too busy glancing back gauging how far it was through the darkness, her hand clutched tightly on his shirt while she heaved in the air like it was going to be rationed any second now. She hated the fear crawling inside her head, whispering all the hateful things to fuck her up mentally.

Bad things happen to me in the dark.

She was safe with Rider, on some level, she knew that, but the fear was greater than any reasoning she could adhere to. Her brain wouldn’t work properly, why wouldn’t it just stop! She wanted to scream.

"Zara.Shit. Darlin’ it's going to be okay. Look at me." Zara's head came around, meeting his eyes immediately.

Not because he'd commanded it, but something in the way his voice had dropped to softness, the timber of it reached inside Zara and soothed what frightened her the most.

She felt her breath even off and slow to a steadier pace before she hyperventilated. The blue had turned almost black, such steady sure eyes Rider had, calming her with them.

"We're more than halfway, it would take longer to head back then it would be to make it on the other side. Trust me, nothing here can hurt you. You want to tell me what set you off?”

She shook her head. How could she explain to the man she was probably falling for all the nasty in her head? Another hard lung full and she let go of his shirt one finger at a time, frowning she saw she’d wrinkled it, she did her best to smooth it out. “I feel safe at the clubhouse.” behind the gate and security, inside his room and the very tall wide menacing biker president as protection.