Page 31 of Deadly Knight

I did it.

I hate myself.

I miss him.

I had to.

I only hope I won’t regret giving him up…

I don’t makeit far—only to the end of her yard—before I’m on my knees.

After a few minutes, the door to Katya’s house opens and shuts, and I assume it’s one of her parents about to command me away. Steps approach me until her father lowers himself beside me, stretching his legs out in front of him like sitting on his front path with a heartbroken teen is a normal day’s activity.

“You probably hate me.” My gaze stays locked on my car parked across the street to avoid looking at him.

“I should,” he replies, “but I don’t. You saved my daughter, even if it’s your world that dragged her to that warehouse.”

My head jerks up, stunned by his words. I wouldn’t blame Katya if she admitted my family’s background to her parents after everything.

“She told you?”

“No. But I know who you are, Dimitri Volkov, son of the Bratva’s second.”

My mind races. When I met Katya, I did my due diligence before becoming her friend and had her background checkedinto. Her entire family are regular citizens, with the past four generations having no links to anything criminal.

He catches my widened eyes with an amused expression. “Relax, kid. One doesn’t become an old man in this country without noticing things. The Volkovs haven’t always remained in the shadows. A couple decades ago, your family caused quite the ruckus in the media. Put them on a map for a while. That would have been yourdedushka, I assume.”Grandfather.He makes a humming noise in consideration before answering his own question with a lazy shrug. “No matter. They stayed out of the public’s eye after that. Never really resurfaced. Guess your family realized secrecy was safer.”

Considering we’re criminals on the opposite side of the law, it amazes me to hear there was a time when the Bratva was lazy about hiding.

“If you knew who I was, why’d you allow Katya around me?”

“By the time my stubborn daughter told me your name, it was too late. Honestly, at first, I thought the two of you would be broken up by the month’s end.”

“Instead we lasted years.”

He huffs lightly. “Yeah. The more time that passed, the more I saw how well you treated her. I might be a silly old man speaking out of turn, so forgive me when I say I have some idea about how your family works.” He pauses, rubbing a hand over his chin. “You’re a child, Dimitri. One forced to follow your family’s path. As long as you didn’t hurt my daughter or take her anywhere she could be hurt, I could pretend you led a regular life.”

“I rarely took her to my house,” I state, feeling the need to give examples of all the ways I tried to keep her safe. “When we did go, it was when no one was around.”

“Exactly my point.”

“She got hurt, though, and that was my fault. I should have done better.”

“It is,” he agrees, hammering the nail into me with the two simple words. “But it’s also not.”

“Don’t defend me.”

His intense stare drills into the side of my face. “That’s what you think I’m doing? Your lifestyle did this to her, but you had no hand in it. I’m aware of that much. Pieced together everything she left out of her story.”

“If only we never dated—if I never drove her home from that party years ago—this wouldn’t have happened.” My hand tightens around the ribbon in my palm.

The party in first year when her dick of an ex-boyfriend was trash to her. I spent half the night watching them together, partly out of jealousy and the need to study her, and then to make sure he didn’t hurt her. Instead, he ignored her, which was just as bad. I only stepped in when he acted, the shove he gave her still burned into the back of my skull. After ensuring she was okay, I drove her home after overhearing how anxious she was to miss her curfew. That trip was the beginning of my addiction.

After ensuring her safety, I went back for a not-so-friendly chat with her ex to remind him to how to treat girls and to ensure the asshole knew Katya was no longer available.

“Da,”he once again agrees with me. “But I don’t hate who my daughter’s become during her time with you. Loyal. Caring. Did you know, for years, Katya wished to attend university in Canada? She mapped out every school she planned on applying to. Then one day, she changed her mind. Decided being local to Moscow and getting her education here would be simpler for her certifications. While that’s true, it wasn’t difficult to figure out why she changed plans.” He tosses me a meaningful look. “I know my daughter, and she’s unfailing in her decisions, which is why her mother and I let her be. But never was I pleased shechanged so suddenly for a relationship you were both too young to be certain about.”

He’s wrong about that. There’s never been a time I haven’t been certain about Katya.