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T he next morning, I swing my legs out of Jax’s bed for my 9 am class and seriously reconsider whether I want to graduate college. Is it worth it? To leave the warm, cozy forest green sheets that smell like Axe ?

“Up and at ‘em, Ash.” Jax sits down on the edge of the bed. One arm pins a sampler of breakfast items to his chest, and he unloads them into my lap: chocolate milk, apple, Pop-Tarts, a single-serving box of Lucky Charms .

“I can’t eat Lucky Charms with — ”

He produces a spoon with a flourish. I take it but finish, “ chocolate milk .”

“You don’t drink milk with your cereal .”

“I could start,” I say, but he’s right. “Luke and Mave are picking me up after Comp. Exorcism over lunch, then back to school in time for Bio lab. See? I’m balancing the weird and the freshman life .”

Jax looks at me skeptically. I half-shrug. At least I told him where I was going; I’m being honest, even if he doesn’t like what I’m doing. Whatever is going on between Jax and I, whatever is developing, I don’t want to ruin it by keeping secrets .

Sometimes I feel this pure physical attraction to Luke, despite what a jerk he is, for both his perfect body and his dangerous competence. The way he sheltered me last night, putting his own body between me and harm, bugs me. Then I look at Jax, who is always so kind and caring, and I think I’ll be okay when Luke gets in his Subaru and drives out of my life forever. Overcome by a wave of fondness for Jax, from his serious face to his Pop-Tart gifts, I lean forward and put my arms around his neck .

“Thanks for breakfast,” I tell him, because I can’t tell him all that .

He hugs me back. “ Any time .”

I hope he means that. Jax waited for me for a long time before I decided to like him back. Now I worry that he’ll run out of patience with me before we can figure out how to be a couple .

* * *

W hen Freshman Comp is over, I walk out of the small classroom into the brightly-lit, artificial-lemon-scented hallway. The students around me are chattering and laughing. The girl who sits next to me slings her backpack over her shoulder, but she accidentally bumps it into me. Our eyes meet, and she smiles in apology. Everyone seems to know each other .

Sometimes I make small talk before class with people, but I could make more of an effort. As much as I love being with Jax, and as much as I want more of Jax, I should get to know other people too. And I’m going to work on that, just as soon as this geist smokes off to the Far .

I jog down the black-rubber stairs to the basement floor, then walk past the teacher’s offices towards the back door, which leads to the gardens behind the campus center. It’s the long way to go, but I’m meeting Mave and Luke at 10:30 in the dorm parking lot, so I have a little time to kill. I want to pick up a sandwich from the campus center. Or maybe 3. I wonder if Luke would manage to be appreciative if I brought him lunch, or if he would tell me that it’s just so typical I bought him turkey, because civilians .

The instructors’ doors are all decorated with signs about their office hours, cut-out cartoons, and favorite photographs printed out on glossy paper. One of the professors does microphotography. I pause at his door, which is a guessing game: what is this, this small thing blown up to the size of an 8 by 11 page, so big that you can’t place it anymore? Once he’s stumped us long enough, every other week or so, he posts the answer to what a thing is on a sticky note alongside the photo. It tempts me to take one of his Lit classes next semester .

Plus, it’s pretty hard for me to fail a Lit class. I write decently, even if my focus is awful when it comes to reading a math textbook. Maybe I should take a lot of Lit classes. At least until I get the hang of college .

I’m contemplating my career prospects with an English degree as I push open the back door and step out into the green lawn behind the building. I let the door go, but it’s pulled further away from my fingers. I turn, looking over my shoulder .

A tall man in his forties, old but still handsome with a craggy face and dark brown hair, smiles at me . “ Hi .”

“Hi,” I say. I walk away, my senses automatically prickling. I wonder what percentage of my elevated sense of risk is just part of being a girl, and how much of it is being a medium .

“I’m Professor Boyd,” he says. “Sorry to startle you. I saw you walk past my door, and I wanted to ask you a question .”

“Oh.” Why would an instructor who isn’t even teaching one of my classes have a question for me? I’m confused, but I don’t want to be rude to a professor. “What about ?”

“I wondered what sorority you were pledging .”

Oh, damn. Somehow, Luke’s lie about me pledging some sorority—was it called PIE or something—has followed me here. I fix a blank look on my face and stare at him as he continues. I’m pretty sure it was PIE .

I flash him a perplexed smile, trying to act innocent . “ Why ?”

“Because I heard you were pledging PIE .”

Yep, that one .

He goes on, “But they’ve got no record of you .”

Well, this is awkward. I stare at him, and he stares back at me .

He gives first. “We’ve had some underground fraternities pop up off-campus. They aren’t a part of the school’s Greek system, so they don’t have any oversight. Things can get out of hand. When I heard you were pledging, but you weren’t listed as a pledge in the database the school’s Greek Life Council keeps, I got concerned. I don’t want to see any students get hurt .”

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I’m not pledging, I think maybe you mixed me up with someone else ?”

He frowns. “I’m sorry to bother you if that’s the case. You’re Ashley Landon, aren’t you ?”

“Yes.” Unfortunately .

“Your name came up when I was meeting with the pledge chair for Kappa Omega,” he says .

I nod. The less I talk, the fewer lies I have to deal with later .

He spreads his hands out, palms up. “You’re not in trouble. You shouldn’t be trespassing on frat property, but I get it. Pledges do crazy things to gain acceptance.” When I don’t say anything, he adds in a confidential tone, “You wouldn’t believe the stuff I did as a freshman .”

“Were you in Kappa Omega?” All my alarm bells are going off. What if there’s some kind of big Kappa Omega lets-murder-girls-and-bury-them-in the- woods conspiracy? What if they sacrifice girls to some demented lesser god that looks like a poltergeist? Anything could happen in this world; that’s what I’ve learned since becoming a psychic .

And now it’s just me and this dude, out on the grass lawn isolated by trees and flowering bushes. There’s no one else in sight .

He lets the door to the building shut softly behind him. There’s no handle on this side of the door .

“I was,” he tells me pleasantly. “Despite the stupid things I did, college was the best four years of my life. I liked it so much, I went on to get a PhD .”

“I would love to go to grad school someday.” I seize on something I might be able to distract him. Plus I can use the info. I’ll need to check if anything iffy happened while he was in grad school. Maybe he brought his poltergeist along with him somehow. Every option is worth exploring. “Where did you go ?”

He gives me a brief rundown of his resume, then asks me what major I’ve declared .

“I’m supposed to be doing accounting,” I say. “But I haven’t declared yet .”

“ Accounting ?”

“It seems like a good idea.” I don’t know though; maybe we shouldn’t ask people to pick their forever job when they’re eighteen .

“So what would you get your doctorate in ?”

Ugh. This is getting specific, and therefore dicey .

“Well,” I lie, “To be honest, I don’t think I really want to be an accountant. I think I want to study literature .”

“And your parents want you to choose something practical?” he fills in the gaps .

“Yeah,” I say. “My dad was an accountant. Then he went and got his law degree. I just kind of thought I’d follow in his footsteps, you know? And he loves the idea.” For a second, the fantasy feels true. Pretending I have a father is a lie that I could wrap around me like a warm blanket .

“Sometimes it takes parents a while to really see what might be best for you,” Professor Boyd tells me. “If you’re really passionate about something, though, they usually come around. Most parents want to see their kids be happy .”

“Yeah, that’s definitely what matters most to my dad. He’s a good guy.” My eyes are suddenly aching. It’s the sleep deprivation from the night before .

“Oh, Ashley.” Professor Boyd ruffles through his jacket pockets, pulls out a package of tissues and hands me one, along a kind smile .

I smile as I take it. “Do you make students cry all the time? You have to be prepared ?”

“I promise, I don’t.” he tells me. “Just the Kappa Omega guys, sometimes. You know those frat boys are all softies on the inside .”

That’s not the image I had of them, but hey, I like the idea of them weeping in front of a Nicholas Sparks movie. It makes it harder to picture them beating the ever-loving shit out of Luke if they get the chance .

“They were pretty bummed your boyfriend dropped out of rush,” he tells me, and my stomach drops. We’re back to this subject. “They hate to have failed pledges. They usually have a small pledge class, just the guys they really like. They’re not like TKE .”

I nod. Back to the let’s just try not to say something incriminating silence .

“I know they gave Luke a call, but he didn’t get back to them. Would you talk to Luke? Ask him to just get in touch ?”

“Of course,” I say .

“I can’t make you tell me about the sorority. But I’m worried about you, and any other girls that might be pledging underground. The Greek council is a good thing. It keeps the houses from going overboard pledging. The whole point of rushing is sisterhood and brotherhood, within your house and the whole of the Greek system.” He puts the pack of tissues back in his pocket, and draws out sunglasses from a breast pocket instead. “I can always put a good word in for you with Kappa Omega’s sister, Psi Psi Psi. You could rush in the spring pledge class .”

“Thank you,” I say. Neither confirm nor deny .

“Stay out of trouble, Ashley,” he tells me, before he saunters off ahead of me towards the campus center .

I’ll try. But good fucking luck .