Page 24

My day goes badly. I shout at the staff, which I never usually do.

I almost trip over my own feet when I give a dance lesson, and I’m late for a staff meeting, which Max berates me about in front of everyone.

I don’t mind Max shouting at me, I can shrug it off.

He likes to show he’s the boss by being hard on us sometimes.

But I can’t stand Robbie’s smirk as I receive my dressing down.

Especially after seeing him this morning, being treated almost like one of the family by Baby’s father.

But what’s worse is the knowledge that I had a go at Baby.

I shouldn’t have done that; I was out of order.

Regret hangs heavy in my chest, because he’s the one person outside my two closest friends who seems to see who I am.

I haven’t seen him all day, he must be avoiding me, and that feels so much worse.

I miss seeing him curled up in the chair in the studio.

He always senses when I’m gazing at him and he looks up and gives me his pretty smile.

I miss finding him half asleep in my cabin when I return there between shifts too.

Without him in my day it feels hollow and somehow meaningless.

I need to find him and apologise. It’s up to him when he feels it best to talk to his family.

Before I try to hunt him down I call to see Penny.

She’s still on light duties and is usually resting in her cabin between shifts.

When I open the door, Baby is with her, sitting on a chair chatting.

He rises when he sees me and walks past me, not even looking at me, and the lump in my chest grows until I can hardly breathe. I turn back to Penny.

“Johnny.” Her voice holds a warning tone. “I told you to be careful.”

“I’m fine,” I lie unconvincingly.

“He’s a good kid.”

“Yeah, I know, too good for me.” The sharp edge of my voice betrays me and shows the cracks.

“I didn’t say that,” she sighs. “He’s not like us. He’s grown up with a loving family. Don’t expect the same from him as you would from one of us.”

I almost bark out a laugh, because the kid is one of the toughest people I know.

I’m the coward here, and that’s the part that made me snap at him and has had me twisted up all day.

After a few more minutes I take my leave from Penny.

As I close the cabin door I see Baby waiting on the porch, picking at the wooden railings.

That he hasn’t left makes my heart beat a little faster in my chest. I walk over to him and he looks up at me.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. You don’t ever need to tell your family if you don’t want to.”

He wraps his arms round me and I pull him close, breathing into his hair, inhaling his scent. He always smells of fresh linen and the summer sun.

“I want to tell them. I’m just scared,” he whispers against my chest.

Robbie appears around the corner of the cabin and looks straight at us. His face twists into a cruel smile.

“Looks like the brother is as easy as the sister. I didn’t figure him as a poofter, though.”

It’s the last time I’m going to take his shit.

Making comments about me is one thing, but he doesn’t get to say anything about Baby—ever.

I launch myself at him, knocking him to the ground.

I land a kick to his ribs and he curls up.

I grab his shirt and draw my arm back, and he lifts his hands to cover his face.

I see his expression; he’s actually terrified I’m going to hit him.

For all his talk he’s not willing to fight.

I lower my arm and shove him away from me.

“You’re full of hot air and nothing else. Stay away from us, you worthless posh boy.”

I walk away from him and back to where Baby is waiting for me at the railing. I hug him to me again as I hear Robbie scramble away.