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CHAPTER TWELVE

Sean

I DECIDE TO take Tara our to a casual diner for our first date. I need to feed her and our little nugget. I love that term. She did good picking a nickname out for our little one. I wonder if she has a real name picked out yet. I’ll have to ask her, and see how she would feel about naming little nugget after my dad, Niall, if it’s a boy.

Tara refused to talk to me once I got her in the car. She’s just been glaring at me. Her arms crossed over her chest. She even refused to talk to the waitress to give her order. I finally ordered for her. The file I have is invasive. I knew I ordered her favorites before her eyebrows rose in surprise. French toast with extra butter, scrambled eggs with sausage and home fries. I also know she would have preferred bacon instead of sausage but the baby has been giving her trouble with the smell of it.

Finally, after several minutes of silence while we wait for our food, she speaks. “You drugged me.”

“It was perfectly safe.” I reply.

“You drugged me.” She repeats.

I sigh. I should have known that was going to be a sticking point for her. “You and our baby were never in any danger.”

It’s like she doesn’t listen. “You drugged me.”

“Would it help if I said I was sorry?” I’m not a man that has a need to apologize in my world. For her, I would do it.

“Are you sorry?” She asks.

“No.”

The look on her face doesn’t soften but she does uncross her arms. “Then no.” She pauses. “You drugged me.”

This time when she says it, I can’t help the sigh that escapes my lips. Deciding it’s best to get everything out in the open, I tell her the truth. “Yes I did. I’m not sorry I did it. You were making a scene and we were too exposed. I needed to get you out of there and somewhere safe?”

“Exposed? Safe? I don’t understand.” She stares around the empty restaurant.

I knew my girl wasn't one to be impressed by fancy Michelin star restaurants. It’s why I chose this hole in the wall place.

Our waitress arrives and drops our orders onto the table before walking away. I make a grab for Tara’s hand when she goes to move her plate. She tries yanking it away, but I don’t let her.

I’ve been monitoring my girl from afar the past week. I needed to handle business back home before I could come to her. So I sent Rian. He gave me near hourly feedback on her. From his messages and my girl’s file, I’ve discovered that Tara is touch starved.

Touching is one of her love languages, but ever since her ex-boyfriend Joey cheated on her, she has avoided physical contact with everyone except her closest friends and family. I intend to give my girl all the touching she wants.

That sounded dirty. Fuck I can’t wait until she trusts me enough to take her to bed again. I’ve got a major case of blue balls. Even though my right hand has been getting a daily workout, it seems my balls are always full. I think it’s because I can’t stop thinking of Tara. Can’t stop reminiscing about our weekend together.

She let me touch her then.

With her hand firmly in mine, so I know she can’t leave me. I tell her everything. About the Doyle Mob and my role as an enforcer. About the numerous businesses I oversee as well as Eclipse. I tell her about the need for Killian, Grady, Callum, and I to provide a strong and united front due to the turmoil and changes going on. Lastly, tell her about Patrick, and all the shit he’s been putting us through.

About a minute in, she stops trying to pull her hand from me. She doesn’t move. At all. I’m almost afraid she isn’t breathing.

But then she laughs.

Big belly laughs.

She’s laughing so hard, she is holding her stomach.

After a few minutes her laugh calms enough for her to look up at me again. She must see the seriousness on me face. “You’re serious?”

I nod.

“Holy shit.” She runs her hands through her hair. “Why are you telling me all this?”

“We’re married.” I say as though it is obvious.

She shakes her head. “No we aren’t.”

To answer her, I look pointedly at her left hand. She follows my gaze and jolts. I’m surprised she didn’t realize she was wearing my ring earlier. I made sure the rock was big enough you couldn’t miss it. It’s an eight carat marquise cut diamond with a white gold band.

Callum must have been paying attention to our conversation, because he gets up from his own booth behind her. Taking the few steps to us, he pulls out a piece of folded paper from his jacket pocket.

Tara looks at it, then at him, and back to it before taking it. She holds it like it’s going to bite her. Slowly she unfolds it. Her eyes darting back and forth quickly as she glosses over it’s contents.

I already know what it is. It’s a copy of our marriage certificate.

She breaks into a humorous laugh as she folds the paper in half and proceeds to rip it to shreds. “There, now we aren’t.” She exclaims proudly.

I can’t help but to chuckle. “You know that’s not how that works.” I tell her.

Because Callum is Callum and likes to push buttons, he retrieves a second copy out of his other pocket.

Tara sits stunned for a moment before she lunges for it and tears it apart as well.

Callum smiles and pulls out another copy.

My hellcat mangles that copy as well. Then asks, “how many copies do you have?”

He shrugs, I laugh. She glares at us both.

Her stomach gives a loud growl. I nudge her plate towards her. She gives me a dirty look. I think she wants to throw the plate at me, but when her stomach growls louder, she thinks better and begins to tuck in to her meal.

I give her a few minutes to eat before I continue our conversation “I’m not having my child born out of wedlock. I got the paperwork out of the way, so we could focus on us. If you want a wedding or a ceremony later, I’d be happy to give you that.”

“I thought you didn’t want the baby. Or was it just me you didn’t want?”

“Honestly, I never thought I wanted kids, and definitely not a wife. I liked my life. I liked my variety.” I pause for a moment. I know she wants to butt in, but I raise my hand to signal I’m not done explaining. “My life is dangerous. It’s why I was cautious to always wear a condom. I didn’t want to have an accidental pregnancy, because I knew I would step up and claim my child.”

“Sorry to fuck up your plans.” She grumbles almost under her breath.

“You did fuck them up.” She looks stunned that I admitted it. “But in the best ways. I didn’t handle it well. Before you came to tell me about the baby, I had been thinking about you a lot. Wondering what you were doing, who you were doing it with, and I found myself getting pissed. I was pissed to think that someone else was getting to touch and taste you. Then I was pissed at myself because I didn’t think that’s what I wanted. For years I believed I wanted variety above all else.

“Then you came to the club, and at first I was excited that you wanted another round. For a moment I let myself imagine a future together. It didn’t last long. Old doubts crept in.”

I pause for a moment and take a sip of my coffee. “Over the years I have had numerous woman approach me, claiming I got them pregnant. Not a single one saw me for anything more than my bank account.”

“I didn’t want your money.” She whispers.

Needing more contact with her. I move from my side of the booth and join her on hers. I grab both of her hands and place them in mine. “I know that now. Hell, I knew it two minutes after you left. I made a mistake. A horrible mistake. I never should have let you go that day. I should have reacted better. Instead, the memory of hearing you tell me you were pregnant which should have been one of the best moments of my life, is tainted.”

She nods. Then to my surprise she leans her head on my shoulder. “I was so nervous to tell you. You had been so adamant about it just being a one time thing, that I wasn’t sure how you would react.” She pulls back slightly so she can look into my eyes. “I really didn’t want money. I wasn’t trying to trap you. I have enough to provide a good life for the baby. And I didn’t expect you to marry me. You don’t love me, let alone know me, what happens if you grow tired of me later. Do we divorce? How does that work in your world?” She takes a short breath, not enough for me to interject. “And mafia? What the fuck? What am I supposed to do with that information? What does that mean for me now?”

She’s spiraling. I need to pull her back so we can get through this, and move on to the fun part of our relationship.

Making a split second decision, I decide to stop her rambling with my mouth. The kiss is soft at first. Within moments she is deepening it. Her hands wrap around my neck and pull me closer.

After several long minutes, we break apart. Both of us a little winded.

“I know you didn’t trap me. You were actually the unassuming victim of a larger ploy.” Her head tilts to the side in confusion. “Before you, I had this girl Jessica that I would call when I wanted a hook up, she was one of the exceptions to my one night only rule. She knew her place in my life, or so I thought. We didn’t kiss, cuddle, or talk. It was get in, get off, get out. I hadn’t been with her for a few weeks before I met you, and I haven’t been with anyone since.”

Her jaw drops at my admission. “Really.”

“Really. However, I do need to clarify, that I had made plans to be with Jessica again. I had called her a few days after you gave me the baby news. I was frustrated with myself. Confused about if you were telling the truth about the baby, and if so, what did I want to do about it, if anything. I stupidly thought that hooking up with someone else might help me make-up my mind. It did. After I called her, and was waiting in the suite for her. I realized I couldn’t do it. I tried having a drink and still going through with it, but my gut was telling me it was wrong.”

I pause again. “What happened?”

“She had been digging in the drawer, looking for the condoms she had brought the last time we had been together. When she couldn’t find them, she got panicked. Again, that concerned me. I had a hunch at that point, so I gave her the new pack of condoms I had bought, and then turned my back to refill my drink. She thought I couldn’t see her. I could. Through the reflection on the balcony door, I watched as she poked holes in the condoms.”

“No.”

I nod. “Yeah. I’m sorry sweetheart. You were the unintended victim of her plan. She thought that if I got her pregnant, and DNA could confirm it was true, that I would claim her and the baby. She wanted access to my money. To my connections.” I admit. “Until then, I thought we had been safe. I’d never had a condom fail before. After learning the truth, I was hit with the immediate need to find you. To claim you.”

“Because of the baby.” She says. No heat in her voice.

“Yes, and no.” I say as I place my hand on her belly. “Yes, I want our baby. No, because I want you too. Even without the baby, I would have eventually come for you. The memory of our time together was slowly dragging my head out of my ass.”

Tara opens her mouth to speak. I know she is going to try to refute my claim. I don’t let her. “There is one more piece to this puzzle that I need to tell you about so you have the whole picture. I don’t want you finding out later and thinking I lied to you.”

“Okay. What is it?”

I really hope this doesn’t put a larger wedge between us. “Killian, my boss, the head of our family, has asked me and the rest of the men in the inner circle, to look into finding a wife, and making a family. He wants to prove we are strong, and working on the next generation to the rest of the family.”

“So you are using me?” She accuses as she tries to push away from me.

“No, it’s why I’m bringing this up now. I want you to know that I never planned to go through with his plan. I was already thinking of ways to delay it long enough for him to move on from the idea. I figured once he, Grady, and Callum each had a couple of kids, he would forget about me.” I pull her closer to me again. Needing her to feel how sincere I am. I place her hands on my chest. Right over my heart. “I did not marry you out of duty, or obligation. Those are just the excuses I allowed myself to acknowledge. Truth is, I need you. I can’t get you out of my head, and it’s fucking with me. My life is stressful, bloody, and dangerous. The only time in my adult life that I felt like I could let it all go, was when I was with you.”

“It was just sex.” She says trying to deny us.

I shake my head with a laugh. “It’s true the sex was amazing.” She smiles at that. “It was more than that. I broke every rule I had with you. First was no kissing. Second was no second rounds. Third was no cuddles. Then no overnights. And finally breakfast. Even after all of that, I still needed more with you. So now I’m being selfish. I’m taking you. I’m claiming you and our baby. I’ve already made sure we are married. Soon we will will be a family.” I finish saying as I rub her little bump.

“This is a lot.” She says. I can see the tears building.

“Don’t cry sweetheart. I promise, we will work this out.” I kiss her forehead. “I swear, I will be faithful to you. We can have a good life.”

She doesn’t respond.

I may have pushed too much on her all at once. I don’t think she’s even thinking about the dangers that come with my mafia life. She’s still caught up on coming to terms with us being married. On me claiming her.

I toss a few bills on the table, stand, and lead her out of the restaurant and into the car.

She is silent on the way to the car, and during the drive.

We’re about two minutes from her apartment building when my phone rings. I answer it. “Sean here.”

“Get her out of here. Don’t come back to the apartment.” Oscar yells. In the background I hear grunting, then a gun shot.

We’re just about to turn onto her road. “Don’t turn.” I instruct Rian. “Keep driving straight.” Rian doesn’t answer, but does as asked.

Tara perks up at this. “What’s going on?”

I don’t answer her. “Oscar. Oscar?” I yell into the phone. Another gunshot echoes through the receiver.

Then I hear Oscar. He sounds out of breath. “Motherfucker.” Another grunt. “Sorry boss. We were ambushed.”

“Handled?” I ask. Needing to know if the threat’s been neutralized and what the status of our men is.

“Yeah. Two teams. I’ve got one warm, four cold, and one fucker got away. I clipped him before he got away.” He replies. “No casuals on our side. Zack got an ass whooping. They got the jump on him first. Probably a concussion and needs some stitches. I got grazed, Danny will stitch me up in the car.”

“Exit?” I ask next. We don’t own this city. I can pay for immunity for my guys, but I don’t want the hassle.

“Loading up now. No cameras.” Meaning they will be leaving with the prisoner they grabbed, and all shell casings. Leaving no trace our family was involved.

“What’s going on?” Whispers Tara. She’s trying to ask Rian, knowing I’m not able to answer at the moment.

“Someone broke into your apartment.” Damn, good answer. I don’t need her panicking right now. I don’t know what the excitement will do to the baby.

“Oh my god.” Her hands fly up to cover her mouth. “We have to call the cops.”

“Sean is handling it.” Replies Rian.

Damn right, I am. Those fuckers are going to pay for coming after my family.