Page 17

17

Claira

I woke up with a start, my heart racing and my mind already jumbled with countless thoughts. Since coming on land, I’d always prided myself on being strong and capable. But lately, I’d been unable to shake this feeling of helplessness.

For a moment, I just lay there in bed, staring up at the ceiling and trying to make sense of it all.

“It’s already nine?” I groaned, glaring at my clock like the number might flip upside down if I blinked hard enough. As a seasoned fisher, sleeping in until 9 a.m. was practically unheard of, but last night had been different. I’d lain awake for hours, my mind and body wracked with worry over Leander.

Over and over, he’d said he was fine.

He’d lied .

Leander wasn’t fine, and the uncertainty of when his next fit would come was almost overwhelming. It had taken all my willpower to fight the temptation to crawl out of bed and join him and Kai out on the living room floor.

Since when had I become so needy?

There was a deep longing in my chest, an ache to have them near me and to know that both of them were okay. I’d experienced something similar before, but the extent of my need for them now was staggering. At one point, I’d stood at my door, my hand on the knob, wondering what they’d have done if I tip-toed out to the living room and settled in between them.

But then there was the problem of Dad and Gram—the only reason I’d ultimately collapsed back onto my mattress. Surely they would have noticed me out there on the living room floor, sandwiched between two grown men.

I swallowed, staring up at the sprinkling of stars Dad had helped me put up along the perimeter of my ceiling. If I had found the courage to go out there, would Leander and Kai have fought over me?

Yep, Laverne had called it. I was a harlot. Because that thought had my belly warming and my nerves fluttering in a deliciously pleasant way.

I chastised myself with a mumbled, “Pervert,” and dragged myself out from under my unicorn comforter. Sunlight streamed in through my window, casting a warm and welcoming glow over my shaggy pink rug, but it did little to ease the anxiety knotting my stomach.

Would Leander be better today? My heartstrings pulled—I needed to see him.

After getting up and grabbing fresh clothes, I headed for the bathroom. The smell of coffee and bacon wafted into the hallway from the kitchen, making my stomach rumble in anticipation. Gram was surely attempting to lift my spirits with her cooking after the emotional wreck I’d been over Leander last night. And worst of all, I hadn’t even been able to tell her what was wrong with him.

My feet dragged as I approached the bathroom, and I took a deep breath to stop myself from peeking in on them before I’d brushed my teeth and my hair.

Once I refreshed myself and threw some extra water on my face, I went to the living room, anticipating finding the guys lounging around. But when I looked inside, the room was almost completely empty. All the quilts I’d put out had been folded and arranged into a stack of neat squares, leaving a large, empty area where the couch usually was.

Empty, except for Barren.

His bulky legs stretched out in front of him as he sat on the floor next to the coffee table, a steaming mug in his hand. When he looked up and noticed me watching him, his brows furrowed slightly, his pupils dilating as his gaze traveled up and down my outfit. Then, a gentle yet awkward smile pulled at his lips, making his strong jaw look more inviting. I nearly had to turn right back around to go change my panties again.

“Morning,” he said and sat his mug down on the smooth tabletop. His voice was coarse, like that was the first word he’d uttered today.

Dad must have brought in all the clothes we’d left on the boat because his brace was fastened over the same shirt he’d worn yesterday. Even his cell phone sat on the edge of the coffee table.

“Good morning,” I replied, still surprised to find him all alone. Our chemistry had grown even more complicated in the last few days. Now that his voice had the same effect on me that Leander’s and Kai’s had, I wasn’t sure where we stood.

Did that make him my mate, too?

Did he even want that?

Yeah—there was no way I was asking. ‘Hey Barren, do you think we’re in the thrall together? Because I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but sometimes I get the urge to climb you like a tree.’

Having two mates already complicated things. Adding Barren to the mix? Yeah, that wouldn’t be awkward for Leander and Kai. Not at all.

At this rate, they might never let me talk to another merman again in fear that I might try to drag them into the group as well.

Trying to keep my cool, I walked over to Barren and inspected his cup of coffee. “Did Gram make that?” I asked, appreciating the view from my standing position. From here, I had a close-up glance of his curly hair and the strong muscles running along the back of his neck.

As I came nearer, Barren seemed to shrink, his posture becoming more and more rigid. Even though his hand was massive compared to the mug, he ran a gentle finger around the rim, his eyes fixated on the steam rising from it. “That and the bacon.” He cleared his throat. “Before she left. Errands, she said.”

“Oh, thank goodness.” Although I was sad that I’d missed Gram before she left, I breathed out a sigh of relief. “You don’t want to drink the coffee when Dad makes it. If you can even call it that.” I scrunched my nose, thinking back to the last time I’d accidentally drank some of Dad’s brew. I hadn’t been able to tell then if I’d swallowed coffee grounds of stuffed a handful of sand into my mouth.

Barren braced his hand on the coffee table, and I took a step back to give him space to stand. As he rose to his full height, my chin tilted up, up, up with him. With his hair mussed from sleep, I couldn’t help but think of him as a towering tree…

Simmer down, Claira, I scolded. There would be no climbing. Especially not right in the middle of the living room.

Though, we were alone.

“Where is everyone else, by the way?” I scoped out the area, even peeking in the open door to Gram’s room—not that I expected to find Kai or Leander in there.

“Training.” He gestured toward the window with a nod.

“Training?” I repeated, my heart starting to race.

Without waiting for Barren to elaborate, I hurried to the window. The couch was in my way, pushed up against it, but I didn’t care. I dropped onto the middle cushion and pulled back the window’s delicate lace curtains to look outside.

And there they were, on the lawn. Two figures locked in a fierce struggle, moving quickly in alternating directions, forward, then back.

But why? They were both still recovering. They needed to be resting, not doing whatever this was.

I leaned close enough for my breath to fog the glass, squinting. Then I gasped, my eyes re-widening in horror. “Are those harpoons?”

“Mmh,” Barren grunted in agreement. “They asked your father for weapons.”

“So Dad gave them harpoons? ” I sighed, feeling a mixture of irritation and amusement. Muttering under my breath, I shook my head. “Gee, thanks, Dad.”

Sure, he’d always tried hard to be the cool dad , but handing out weapons to his daughter’s love interests was taking things a bit far. If I hadn’t known him any better, I would have thought he was trying to kill one of them off.

But, no—he was definitely trying to get them to think he was cool.

“How can Leander move like that in his condition?” My hands curved around the edge of the window frame, grasping the wood. “He needs to rest. To recover his strength,” I went on, talking mostly to myself.

Amazingly enough, Leander didn’t seem to be struggling.

He was a force to be reckoned with, every move he made with his harpoon calculated and precise, like a quick burst of lightning. The gold in his hair flashed with each advance he made on Kai, but despite the intensity of the lesson, he had the careful movements of a teacher training a student rather than someone simply lashing out in anger.

Meanwhile, Kai was the one having difficulty. His harpoon sliced through the air as he fought to fend off Leander’s unrelenting barrage of blows. His footing was unsteady, and he looked so worn out, it was amazing he was still standing.

My anxiety was about to reach its peak when Barren’s voice came from behind me. “Coffee?”

“Uh, sure,” I agreed without really listening to the question. After a few more moments of watching their fight, Barren held out a steaming mug of coffee beside me.

I stared, puzzled as to why he wasn’t gripping the handle, before it dawned on me that he wanted me to take it.

“Oh, thanks.” Warmth spread through my fingers as I took the mug from him. The aroma was divine, and the light caramel hue looked suspiciously like the amount of creamer I normally added to my cup.

Barren’s dark eyes stayed fixed on my lips while I tried it. Rich, smooth flavor filled my mouth. “Wow, it’s great.” I went back for another sip. As I’d thought, he’d somehow prepared it exactly how I made my coffee. “How did you know how much cream and sugar to use?”

“Watched you make it yesterday,” Barren said simply, his gaze directed downward as if attempting to conceal a faint smile. I took another sip, feeling a strange thrill that he’d paid attention to something so trivial. It made sense, though. Barren did seem to have an eye for details.

Now that I had my coffee, he moved to settle back onto the floor. After taking a gulp from his mug, he picked up his phone, and when he started scrolling through it, I returned my attention to the scene outside, a bit disappointed our conversation had already stopped only moments after it had begun.

Kai and Leander were still sparring, their movements fluid and graceful. Well—Leander’s were, at least. Kai was wobblier than jelly. When I was about to go out there and stick up for him, they separated, and I felt relieved when Leander gestured with his arm, granting Kai a break. Kai was more than willing to take it, and the way he dropped to his knees, sprawling on the grass like a limp rag doll, reminded me of how Laverne looked whenever she dramatically laid out on the sand.

Suddenly curious, I turned back to Barren to ask, “Where’s Laverne?”

He looked up from his phone, setting it back on the coffee table. “With your father.”

Ah—that made sense. If Dad was out on the boat, then Laverne was probably in fish heaven right now. He would naturally let her eat as much as she wanted. We’d probably have to roll her back to shore.

Barren took a sip of his coffee, one eyebrow rising. “Jealous?” he asked.

“No.” I gave a small smile as I stared down at my cup. So, I’d been right. Barren had noticed how I’d reacted to Laverne getting all of Dad’s attention. “Okay, maybe a little. But mostly, I’m surprised I slept through all of this.” With all the coming and going, the front door must have opened and shut half a dozen times. Usually, once was enough to wake me up.

Barren shrugged. “You needed rest.” His low voice warmed me more than the coffee had.

I blew on my cup, watching the steam rise. I barely started taking another sip when Barren asked, “May I take your picture?”

“What—?” I sputtered, spitting coffee back into my cup.

“Unless you already have a passport,” he added, concern furrowing his brow.

It was a miracle I hadn’t spilled coffee all over myself. “Passport?” I hurriedly swiped an arm over my chin. “No, sorry. So, we’re going to your island by plane?”

Barren nodded, confirming what I’d suspected would be our next move. It wasn’t like we could have swum all the way to… actually, I wasn’t sure exactly where Barren was from. I did know it was an island in the Indian Ocean, but that didn’t narrow it down much.

“I don’t have the required documents, so I never had the chance to get a passport,” I said. There were certain things I’d never be able to do on land, but that was an old wound I’d long come to terms with. I was grateful I could even go to public school given my lack of documents, not that those bullies made my experience phenomenal.

“Mmh.” He got his phone and stood up. Then he walked into the kitchen and gestured over to the fridge. “It won’t take long.”

“Oh, we’re taking it now?” It was a good thing I’d just brushed my hair. I left the window, setting my coffee on the counter as I came into the kitchen and took my place in front of the fridge.

Barren raised his phone, his eyes glued to the display as I stood there, stiff, offering an uncomfortable grin that I hoped looked natural.

“No smiling,” he said, his expression hidden behind his phone.

“No smiling?” I mumbled, my lips falling. Good luck getting a picture of Kai , I thought, and I sincerely hoped he’d taken the photo because it was hard to keep a straight face imagining how difficult that would be.

When he finally lowered his phone, he closed in on me, showing me the photo he’d taken. “That’s not bad,” I said, surprised by how well it turned out, considering I wasn’t even smiling. “It’s really good, actually.” Maybe his height gave him an edge? I’d heard that face photos were best taken from above.

His jaw tensed like he might have had something to say, but he flicked his thumb over the screen instead, bringing up a picture of Leander, stone-faced, standing in front of my fridge.

“Wow, that one, too,” I said, and he swiped again, this time to Kai. I muffled a laugh. “ Oh , that’s unfortunate. Poor Kai.”

“I did my best,” Barren rumbled, suppressing a deep laugh.

“He kind of looks like he’s in pain,” I mused, and Barren snorted.

He went to put his phone to sleep when his thumb tapped the screen, swiping over to a picture of a cheesecake slice.

“Wait—” I said, leaning into the image. The dessert was beautifully plated, the creamy, caramel-drizzled slice resting on a delicate white dish. “Gosh, that looks delicious.” My stomach rumbled, and I turned to the stove, swiping some strips of bacon sitting out on a plate next to it.

“It was,” Barren admitted.

“Wait—you ate that?” I took another look at it. There was an ornate silver spoon sitting beside it, giving it a sophisticated look. “I thought it was from an online article or something. It looks staged, like a photographer took it.”

The color in his face deepened. “I made it.” He scrolled to another photo, then handed me his phone.

I took it hesitantly, not really sure if I should scroll through a guy’s pictures. There was no telling what I might discover, right? But Barren hovered beside me so intently, his dark eyes tentatively waiting for me to look.

“T-tell me when I should stop,” I said before turning down to the next photo. This one was of a lightly powdered cannoli, with chocolate chips meticulously spaced out over the creamy filling. Now I was really hungry. Every time I scrolled, my eyes grew wider. If Barren had been eating all of these desserts, it was a miracle he didn’t have a gut. “You made these?” I asked, awestruck. “Took the photos, too?”

His chin dipped. “Mmh.”

“Wow.”

His body shifted uncomfortably. “Anything look good?” he asked. After clearing his throat, his voice came a little easier. “I can make it for you when we get to my place.”

My stomach rumbled, eager to accept his offer right away. “Are you kidding me? All of it looks fantastic,” I blurted while my mind backtracked. Wait—his place?

“It’s going to take a while to get our passports, won’t it?” If that were the case, maybe we were better off going back to the hotel to wait until we worked out our flight. That way, Dad and Gram wouldn’t have to keep paying to feed all of us.

He shrugged. “Not long. Our flight leaves tonight.”

“ Tonight? ” That certainly was sudden. But then again, Barren wasn’t likely employing legal means to acquire these passports.

I scratched at my neck, then picked up another piece of bacon. “I… guess I’d better start packing, then.”

Barren looked down at me, his eyes lingering on my lips for a moment too long as I chewed my bacon.

“I’ll give you a hand,” he replied, his voice low and rough. He slid his phone into his pocket. “If you need it.”

“Help me pack?” I turned the idea around in my head, then realized that would mean him going through my drawers with me. Yikes. They were definitely not up to Barren’s standards of neatness.

“Match your socks for you,” he offered, though his shoulders were stiff with nerves. “Your gray with your black, and your white with your tan.” His curls fell over his eyes as he looked down at me.

I burst out laughing, remembering when I’d told him I went through his luggage and changed all his socks around to annoy him. “Now I’m definitely not letting you help,” I said, taking a few steps backward out of the kitchen. “But maybe next time, okay?”

His lips gave the faintest hint of a smile as he nodded.

I turned around, wondering where Dad would have put the rest of the clothes from yesterday. Maybe I could get away with stashing the magical shell in my luggage. It couldn’t hurt to try, could it?

“Pack a swimsuit,” Barren’s voice called after me.

That got me, and I nearly stumbled a step.

“The one I got you. If you still have it,” he added.

It took a second for me to compose myself before turning around and throwing back, “Why, are you taking me swimming?” I crossed my arms, teasing, “I thought you said your island palace had nude beaches.”

For a moment we just stared at each other, eyes locked, when the front door slammed open and Laverne came right through it, a fish wiggling in her mouth.

“Ren!” she said, shuffling right over to Barren. “I brought you a fish!”

Barren took it gratefully, holding the writhing thing in his hand like he wasn’t sure what to do with it next. “Thank you,” he said stiffly. Laverne’s head teetered back and forth, pleased.

So much for our brief moment alone.

Laughing at the sight, I turned around, heading for my bedroom. “Well, I better get packing.” At least I’d be able to wear my own clothes for however long we’d be gone.

Plus, the swimsuit Barren had bought me. I couldn’t forget that.