Page 5

Willow

B lood rushed through my ears, and I swayed on the spot.

Married?

The slamming of the door broke me out of my stupor. I looked up tofind James alone, standing at the door, and staring at me, his face void of any emotion.

“Do you know who I am?”he said, loosening his tie.

My heart began to race.

“Yes, Sir,”I replied, somehow finding my voice and forcing the wordspast the lump of dread lodged in my throat.

He nodded once. After several seconds of staring, he took three slow steps toward me like a predator about to attack his prey. He pulled his tie completely off and threw it on a chair.“Do you understand whatjusthappened?”

My cheeks heated as mortification seeped in. I thought I understood,but my brain was shutting down, preventing me from comprehending what was going on. Or maybe I understood perfectly but refused to accept it.

Anger flashed across his face at my silence.“We signed a marriagecontract. You’re now my wife.”

My heart plummeted for the second time.

No.

No. This couldn’t be happening.

Tears stabbed at the back of my eyes as he confirmed my fears but Iforced them away. Tears resulted in punishment.

When I couldn’t find the words to reply where shock was gripping mefiercely, he continued.“I want to make a few thingsveryclear to you, Mouse. Are you listening?”

Mouse?

Why did he call methat?

“Yes, Sir,”I whispered, finally finding my voice.

A muscle in his jaw ticked before he sighed and crossed over to ahigh-backed chair. He sat as I gawked at him, trying to come to terms with what was happening.

“You may be my wife, but I’ll never love you,”he said, his cold tonematching the coldness in his eyes.“I will never kiss you, or hold your hand, or any bullshit likethat. This isn’t a relationship. You are here for two purposes. The first is to please me. The second, to give me a child.”

As if I wasn’t already in a state of astonishment, his words shockedme to myverycore.“Do you understand, Mouse? There will be consequences if I have to repeat myself.”He raised a brow, impatience written on his face.

“Y…Yes, Sir,” I stuttered.

“Good,”he replied stoically. He began to remove his suit jacket,oblivious to the panicthathad taken hold of me.

Over the years, I’d learned to tamper down my emotions. Endlesspunishments and pain meant it was better for my own sake to not show how I truly felt. But no matter how much I told myself to not react to discovering I was married to a monster, but also learningthatI was expected to carry his child, the turmoil inside me kept building.

“As my wife, you have duties to perform. Especially if you are to carrymy heir,”James went on, still without a hint of emotion.“Can I assume you know what I mean?”

I was going to be sick, and how I was still standing with the way mylegs were quaking was anyone’s guess.

“Yes,”I replied, my voice breaking as my bottom lip began towobble.

A snarl formed on his mouth, his dark eyes burning into mine.“Comehere, Mouse.”

Despite every part of me screaming not to, Ms. Milligan’s warning rangloud and clear in my ears. I obeyed, as I had been taught to do, moving to where he sat with one long leg crossed over the other.

“I’m not a rapist,”James said, his head tilting to one side.“I need yourpermission before I touch my wife. Do I have it?”

My heart beat so damn fast it was a miracle it didn’t beat straight outof my chest. He and I both knew I didn’t have the option to say no. James was asking to appease his own conscience, surely he knew I didn’t want this?

I swallowed.“Yes.”The simple word held so much and tasted likeacid as it left my mouth.

His eyes narrowed on me briefly before he schooled his featuresagain.“Take your dress off.”

Bile crept up my throat as with trembling fingers, I slid the zipper atthe side of the dress down. I wasn’t sure how long I would be able to keep the tears at bay, but I had to try. I didn’t want to experience James’ punishments, I’d barely survived Ms. Milligan’s punishments.

Butthen, was death better than what I was about to face?

When the zipper was all the way down, I pushed the dress down overmy hips and let it fall before stepping out of it, along with the shoes. A flush spread over my chest as James’ heated gaze roamed over my body.

Aside from Ms. Milligan, no one had ever seen me naked before. I’dnever felt so exposed in all my life, and all I wanted was to snatch the bed sheets and wrap them around me to cover every visible inch of skin.

“Now the bra and panties,”James said, his voice husky.

I managed to stop the sob escaping as I reached around tounclasp my bra, sliding the straps down my arms and dropping it on top of my dress. In the cool air of the room, my nipples puckered, and I had to fight the instinct to cover myself with my hands.

My breath hitched when James licked his lips, and his eyes fixed onmy breasts. Despair pooled in my stomach preventing me from moving any further despite the expectant look on James’ face. He stared at me for several seconds, and I willed my hands to move,but they wouldn’t comply.

Suddenly, he sprung from the chair, launching himself at me, andwrapping a hand around my throat, gripping it tightly enough to let me know he could cut off my air withjusta little bit more pressure.

“I told you, there would be consequences if I have to repeat myself. IfI tell you to do something, I expect you to do it. Don’t make me show you what happens if I have to tell you twice, Mouse,”he hissed, his eyes blazing with fury.“Panties. Off. Now. I want to see what’s mine.”

He released my throat and took a step back. A tear slid down mycheek unbidden, and I could only hope my show of weakness didn’t add to his ire.

Somehow, I managed to coax my body into moving, and I lowered mypanties under James’ fierce gaze. Surprisingly, his gaze didn’t drop to the apex of my thighs, instead, he kept it on my face.

“Turn,” he ordered.

Summoning courage I wasn’t sure I had, I turned, giving himmy back, and holding my breath. I didn’t know if not being able to see his next move was worse than knowing what was coming.

Timeseemedto stand still as I waited for his next command. I wasn’tsure what I was expecting, but it wasn’t the featherlight touch of his fingertips brushing over the rough edges of the scars on my back, his soft touch a contrast to the harshness he’d shown to this point.

As if my scars had burned him, he quickly pulled his hand away.“Onthe bed, Mouse. Get on all fours with your ass up,”he bit out.

I was glad I had my back to him so he didn’t see a second tear fall.Doing as he asked, I climbed on the bed, telling myself to let my mind wander from what wasreallyabout to happen.

I was well practiced in letting my mind go elsewhere whenever Ms.Milligan dolled out punishments. As far back as I could remember, I enjoyed creating stories. I let my mind conjure up all sorts of different plots. Magical worlds where princesses rode dragons, romance stories where the characters would face some kind of adversity before they could finally be together.

I’d focus on building a world with characters who enjoyed their liveswhenever I was lashed with the leather belt, and when I was locked away in my room to let my wounds heal, I’d scribble down everything I’d imagined in my journals.

Despite suffering while creating the stories, they gave me theslightest bit of enjoyment. I could live a thousand different lives through my characters, and for a brief time, I wasn’t Willow Banks, the girl who couldn’t remember her past, and had no hope for a happy future.

I only hoped I’d be able to focus on creating something to get methrough the next few minutes.

From my periphery, I watched James undo his belt, the nerveszapping through me intensifying to the point it felt like I was being electrocuted. A second later, the bed dipped behind me, and a rough hand landed on the back of my neck, pushing my head down into the pillows.

A quiet whimper left me when I felt James press up against me, and Ibraced myself for what was imminent.

James spat, and a second later, his fingers pressed against myexposed entrance as he rubbed his spittle in. When he removed his fingers, they were replaced with something much bigger.

Letting go of my neck, James grabbed my hips, and in one roughthrust, he pushed inside of me. Agony tore its way through my body at the intrusion, and I couldn’t stop myself from crying out.

“Silence!”he growled angrily, his fingers digging into the flesh of myhips.

I bit my lip to stop from crying out again, especially when he pulledout before roughly shoving back inside me. I’d experienced pain many times, but this, somehow it was worse than the strikes of the belt. This felt like I was being cut open from the inside.

“Fuck! Who knew virgin pussy could feel this fucking good,”Jameshissed as he began to move in and out of me.

My entire body tensed from the unbearable burn between my legs.Every time he pulled out and pushed back in again felt like I was being split right down the middle. I tried to focus on something else, lose myself in my fantasies, but the pain was too much to hold onto the sweet images my brain was trying to create.

A copper twang filled my mouth, and I realized I’d made my lip bleedfrom where I was biting so hard to stop from screaming.

“Christ, Mouse. You’re so damn tight. I can feel your cunt squeezingaround me,”he panted, his thrusts growing more urgent.

I closed my eyes, hoping this would be over soon. Thankfully, I didn’thave to wait long. After several more thrusts, James grunted, and a warm sensation filled me. As he pulled out, his heavy breaths filled the room. He leaped off the bed, but I stayed as still as a statue, not daringto move until he said I could.Eventhen, I wasn’t sure I would be able to move, the pain was rendering me immobile.

The sound of James re-buckling his belt hit my ears as I tried toignore the sticky feeling between my legs which was slowly dripping onto the bed.

“Clear yourself up, Willow, and change the fucking bedsheets unlessyou want to sleep in your own blood.”

Withthathe stormed out, slamming the door behind him. Ipushed myself up and off the bed, nausea threatening to erupt out of me. With every movement, pain shot through my center, but it was when my gaze fell on the bloody stains of my innocence,thatmy legs buckled, and I collapsed to the floor, tears streaming down my face.