Page 26 of Crucible

AURELIA

I t’s morning when I wake up a final time, and I’m warm. Burning is more accurate. I also don’t hear the storm anymore. All I hear is the steady heartbeat beneath my ear. I could write a song to that chaotic rhythm.

“Morning, Sunshine.”

When I lift my head, I see Seth’s face staring down at me. He looks relieved and angry and hurt and…something else I don’t want to name because it’s insane . “It was you,” I gasp as I curl my fingers into his thermal shirt. I feel his hard abs right below my fingers as my lips tremble with that same unnamed emotion. “You came for me.”

Seth’s cold lips brush my forehead. “I’ll always come for you, Sunshine. I told Thanatos that you were mine, and he couldn’t have you. Not without taking me too.”

I’m speechless.

What do you say to a person you’ve only known a few days but who vows without one ounce of irony or whimsy that he’ll follow you into death?

“Stalker.”

Seth smiles at my response, but it’s small and fleeting as he pulls me closer while I look around.

“Where’s Thorin and Khalil? They were here, or did I hallucinate that too?”

“It wasn’t a vision,” he tells me as he rubs my back. “They’re scouting for a way home.”

“You mean they don’t know ?” I sit up, but without Seth’s warmth, I’m immediately cold. I force myself to stay put and not use him as a human blanket even though I know he won’t mind. I’m sitting on his lap while he continues to lie on his back, and I have a feeling it’s the only reason he doesn’t yank me back down with him.

“That storm did a lot of damage, Sunshine. It will be tough finding a safe path back, and they won’t risk you until they’re sure.”

I stare at the opening of our little snow cave and the sunlight that makes the packed and hardened snow gleam. Khalil and Thorin built this for me—had risked their own lives to keep me safe and alive until the storm passed. It’s a full minute before I’m brave enough to ask. “Are they mad?”

“Livid, baby.” Seth thinks about it and then says, “Actually, I think we’re both in the doghouse. It’ll be fine. We just need to get you home, and then you can start making it up to us.”

My stomach sinks while pussy tightens at the thought of it—two warring reactions that I’m careful not to give myself away.

“Maybe tie you to the bed so this doesn’t happen again,” Seth muses.

I chuckle nervously. “I can’t tell if you’re joking or not.”

“I’m not.”

“Oh.”

“If it makes you feel better, they’ll probably tie me up too, so at least we can keep each other company.”

“Why?” When he doesn’t answer, I take a stab in the dark. “Because you came after me?”

“Because I came after you without them.”

That’s when I remember Seth was alone when he found me. Thorin and Khalil must have caught up with us after I passed out in his arms, which I don’t even remember doing.

“Well, maybe all the hot air they blow around when they return will warm us up.” Seth laughs, but it sounds forced. My suspicions are confirmed when he sits up and lifts me off his lap to set me down on the sleeping bag next to his. Okay… His green eyes are piercing as he props his arms on his bent knees and studies me like he’s figuring out what to make of me. “What…” Looking away, Seth drops his head to stare at the ground between his bent knees. “Oh, God,” I say when realization slams into me. “You’re mad at me, too, aren’t you?”

“Nah.”

“Seth, don’t lie to me.” His face is pinched as if he’s debating whether he wants to have it out with me or let me get away with putting us all in danger. “It’s okay. You can tell me. I’m a big girl. I can take it.”

“It’s just…” He shoves his fingers through his dark hair, blows out a breath, and then stares at me through hurt eyes that weirdly make me want to die . “I don’t get you, Sunshine. Even less than I did before. You agreed to be my girlfriend, and then you ran. What am I missing? Were you serious, or was it another lie?”

“I…”

Seth squints when I take entirely too long to answer. “Okay, I understand.”

He gently pushes me aside and then tries to leave the snow cave. I should let him go, but for whatever reason, I grab his arm.

“Seth…you assaulted me.” He flinches, but I dig in. I won’t let him run from this any more than they let me run from them. “And you’ve done nothing but count the hours until you can do it again. Don’t you dare try to make me feel guilty for a little white lie when you know it wouldn’t have made a difference. You’d still hurt me even if it were true.”

“It wasn’t a little white lie to me .”

“And you hurting me is no small thing to me!”

“Stop fighting us, and we won’t have to,” he says tightly.

“And they say romance is dead. Besides, I thought you said you like it when I fight back?”

“You know what the hell I mean, Aurelia. Fight us, but don’t fight us . Just stop running. What the hell do you have to go back to anyway? There’s nothing real waiting for you back home, and know you it.”

Seth’s words, while true, are a punch to the gut.

He hasn’t known me long and already he’s guessed that I’ve been nothing to no one for a very long time. There’s hasn’t been anyone in my corner since my parents died. No one to truly miss me now that I’m “gone.” I’m sure even my fans have already moved on.

Heat flames my cheeks and neck, and before I know it, my mouth is moving, and I can’t stop the vitriol. Poison, after all, is my weapon of choice whenever people get too close. “Wow. Thanks. That’s some judgment coming from the weirdo with voices in his head.”

It’s my turn to crawl out of the cave and away from this discussion, and Seth doesn’t stop me. Although he’s slow to follow, he does follow.

I’m shivering almost immediately with my arms wrapped around myself in the early morning light, but I’m too stubborn to go back inside the shelter that looks like an igloo, so when he finally emerges and drapes Harrison’s coat over my shoulders, I’m grateful.

I don’t speak or look at him as I stick my arms in the sleeves—partly because I’m pissed at him for what he said, but mostly because I’m pissed at me for what I said.

“I’m sorry,” I offer as soon I’m burrowed inside the warmth of the coat. It’s the extent of the regret he’ll get from me because even though he risked his life to save mine, he still holds it in the palm of his hand. I force myself to meet his gaze. “That was low even for me.”

“I forgave you when you said it, Sunshine. Can you forgive me?”

“I’ll think about it.” Peeking up at him, I tuck my lips into my mouth to keep from laughing, but Seth has no problem letting his free.

“Oh, Sunshine. If you want me to stop being obsessed, you’re going to have to start making this easy.” Taking my arms as he pivots to stand in front of me, Seth pushes me against the side wall of the quinzee.

“Won’t it collapse?” I ask with a gasp when I feel the cold against my back.

“No. Thorin and Khalil know what they’re doing.” It’s all the explanation he offers before he leans down and kisses me.

“ Mhm , mhm , Seth,” I immediately protest. “Morning breath.”

He chuckles but doesn’t stop kissing me, and I realize very quickly that his morning breath isn’t foul at all.

Oh, God.

He probably brushed last night or before I woke, and I’m the only one with yuck mouth.

Feeling self-conscious, I push him away. “Okay, that’s enough.”

Seth laughs, then walks over to his pack, which he’d dropped by the quinzee’s opening. He rifles through it before handing me a brand-new toothbrush still wrapped in plastic, a canteen full of fresh water, and a travel-size toothbrush.

“Knock yourself out, baby.”

I squeal and throw my arms around his neck. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Best boyfriend ever!”

Seth steals another kiss, closemouthed—thank God—and then pushes me toward the cluster of trees between the fire and quinzee.

“I’m going to go take a piss,” he announces. “Stay where I can see you.”

I sketch a mocking salute. “Yes, sir!”

“Sunshine.”

Fire pools in my belly at the rare commanding note in his tone. I think running last night changed something in Seth, too. I think his hold on me just got a little tighter.

“Yes, Seth,” I offer with a note of obedience that surprises even me. “I’ll stay put.”

“That’s my good girl.”

I turn away before he can see my reaction to the praise. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. By the time I’m done brushing my teeth, Thorin and Khalil have returned to the camp bearing two dead rabbits.

Khalil starts rebuilding the fire while Thorin lays out the rabbits on a large, flat rock.

I don’t know why I feel nervous when I walk over to sit next to the fire with them, but I’m shivering again, and it has nothing to do with the cold.

“Good morning.”

Utter silence greets me back.

I wait for one of them to respond, but they never do. They both pretend they didn’t hear me as they continue to work.

“Look, I know you’re mad at me, but Thorin mentioned a camp, and I thought I could follow you. I didn’t mean to put you or myself in danger. I hope you understand why I had to try.”

The sounds of Thorin skinning the smaller rabbit while staring at me like he wishes the rabbit was me. Khalil arranging some dry kindling he managed to find is all that follows.

“Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you for finding me, I guess. I’d probably be dead if you hadn’t.”

They finally respond, and before they’re done, I really wish they hadn’t.

“You’d definitely be dead,” Khalil says coolly.

“And for the record, we didn’t come for you,” Thorin adds. “We came for Seth. He just happened to find you before we could drag his ass back home and leave you to rot.”

“Oh.” My cheeks flame because I thought…I assumed …God. “Okay, um. Well…thanks anyway.”

I stand, but my knees feel weak. I keep my chin high as I walk away from the campfire, and it takes all that I have to do so.

“Don’t even think about leaving this camp, Aurelia.”

I spin back around, my gaze narrowing on Thorin, who is already watching me. “Why do you care?”

“You don’t want me to show you how much I care, so I advise you not fuck with me.”

My hurt feelings make my eyes prickle while my voice sounds thick from the unshed tears when I speak. “Go to hell, Thorin.”

I storm away just as a whistling Seth returns to camp. We pass each other as I head for the quinzee, but when he flashes me a flirty smile and reaches out for me, I dodge his touch and keep going.

I can feel Seth’s confusion like an arrow in my back, and then I hear him bark at his friends. “What the hell did you guys do?”

I don’t wait around for the answer before crawling back inside the quinzee.

How the hell all four of us fit inside of here last night, I’ll never know. The three of them are huge, so they must have been sleeping practically on top of one of another. Three bedrolls are laid out, and I don’t bother trying to figure out which belongs to who as I crawl inside the middle one and will myself back to sleep.

I knew they’d be mad, but I didn’t expect them to be cruel—not after glimpsing how hard they worked to save me. How desperately.

They care. I know they do.

So why try to hide it?

Why push me away and make me feel like an unwanted nuisance?

Maybe because you’re acting like one?

I fall asleep, and the guys leave me alone until breakfast is done, and Khalil snaps at me from outside the quinzee to wake the fuck up and fuel for the journey. He made it clear that since I want to be a brat they will not be carrying me back. What the hell? I didn’t even know that had been an option.

Grumbling, I reluctantly crawl from the shelter, dragging the bedrolls with me. I have a bitch of time getting them rolled up tight to fit inside their already full packs, and none of the guys help me—not even Seth.

Thorin, Khalil, and Seth have a kind of Three Musketeers thing going on. When one of them is pissed, they’re all pissed, and apparently, that rule extends to me.

Seth is probably just upset that I rejected his affection earlier, but I’ve decided that if one of them pisses me off, then they all can kiss my ass.

Thorin silently hands me a cloth filled with rabbit meat when I join them, and I eat while the three re-roll their sleeping mats before securing them with twine and stuffing them back in their packs.

“How long will it take to get back to the cabin?” I casually ask while chewing on the surprisingly juicy meat. Really, I’m just curious how far I’d made it yesterday—for when I try again later of course.

“We’re only a few miles hike from the base of our mountain.”

I pause mid-chew as the blood drains from my face. “That’s it?”

No…that can’t be right. I’d wandered for hours. I was lost . I was as good as dead . There was no way my circumstances would have been that dire if I hadn’t at least made it a respectable distance. How could I have been that close to the cabin without ever finding it when I’d found it before without even looking for it?

The three of them look at each other before staring down at me.

Khalil is the first to speak. “You didn’t accomplish anything other than nearly getting yourself killed, Aurelia.”

“Maybe think about that the next time you run from us,” Thorin says.

Seth speaks last. “Or better yet, don’t run at all. We won’t be so forgiving a second time.”