Page 25
And I choose now to notice that Stefano is wearing a Boston hat. Traitor.
I clap Ethan on the shoulder. “Looks like you’ve been recognized.” He doesn’t have a chance to reply because Stefano and Mark lure him over with their large bottle of whiskey.
James emerges from the hallway bathroom and searches around for Ethan, relaxing a little when he realizes that Stefano invited his boyfriend to join the drunken crowd on my couch.
He comes into the kitchen to put his beer in the fridge as I’m fixing up another batch of the mulled wine, and then he randomly apologizes for being overly flirtatious with me in high school.
All of us knew it was a joke, and that shit never went anywhere. Sure, it might have confused me for a month or so at the beginning, but it’s whatever.
What’s funny is that James went way overboard with Ethan, realized he wasn’t joking, and now they’re together.
Maybe he’s overthinking it.
“At least he feels the same way,” I say. “You’re one of my boys, and I can’t think of you like that.” I hand him two beers.
He adopts a mischievous smile, and I’m confused as to what might come next. “Makes sense. Also, your athlete kink is limited to hockey players, right? Baseball isn’t really your thing.”
Seriously? The ladle I was using to stir the wine drops into the pot as I let out a sharp chuckle.
Sure, there’s an overlap between guys I’m into and hockey players, but correlation isn’t causation. Hell, I used to play hockey when I was younger, and I didn’t dream of letting anyone score pucks into my goal, literal or figurative.
Then again, Erik has me wrapped around his finger from across the world, but it’s because he’s so damn cute, not because he plays hockey.
Fine, I’ll admit he’s a total smokeshow in his blue jersey.
Yeah, no. That’s beside the point. He looks good in anything.
“Okay, Jamesey-boy,” I start, putting on my least serious voice. “First of all, I don’t have an athlete kink. Second, hockey players are a lot to deal with, trust me.”
“Are you speaking from experience or something?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.
Oh, fuck. I said too much. If I don’t push back, he’ll think it’s true. If I deny it too strongly, he’ll… also think it’s true.
Out of options, and out of time to think, I deflect the only way I know how: with corporate euphemisms and evasive language.
“There are a lot of moving parts, and I’ll circle back once I have better line of sight.” Cringing internally, I gauge James’s expression for any hints of disbelief, but I find nothing. James ribs me for using corporate jargon, he drops it, and I send him back to his boyfriend.
With a sigh, I fish the ladle out of the pot with a pair of chopsticks, pour a mug of wine for Mark who appears behind me, and I switch to beer for myself.
The night devolves into controlled chaos, and our plans to hit a bar for the countdown evaporate.
It started raining, so I don’t care too much.
Mark and Ethan have taken over my console, turning a 1v1 shooting game into a drinking game.
They’re taking a shot whenever one of them gets shot, and Mark is losing.
Badly. James watches them duke it out for a while before getting bored and joining me on the couch once Stefano goes for a refill.
He gives Ethan’s head a quick peck on the way over, which is freaking adorable .
James notices me smiling and shoots me a smirk. “Don’t mind me, just showing my boyfriend that I love him, no big deal,” he says.
“Yeah, you two are cute together,” I reply. “But I still can’t wrap my head around you being with a dude.”
“Luke, you know guys can be into other guys, right? Come on, man. Keep an open mind.”
I smack James on the chest. “Shut up bro, you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m only joking around.” James pauses to take another sip of wine. “It came out of nowhere, but I decided to roll with it. I had those feelings for Ethan, and they weren’t going away, so I took that leap and got together with him for real.”
“Wow,” I say. “That’s pretty profound.”
“Yeah, it sure is. You really can’t hesitate with anything,” he continues, “if I’d chickened out or repressed my feelings, I’d be a mess.”
Ethan comes back to join James, who places an arm around him as he settles down onto the couch.
“But instead of that,” James says, “I’m happy as hell, and later tonight, I’ll go home with my hot boyfriend and then we’ll f?—”
“James.” Ethan shuts his eyes and cuts him off at the same time I raise my hand. The three of us let out a collective chuckle.
“Has he always been like this?” Ethan asks me, still smiling.
“Oh yeah, but it’s funny,” I say. Then I fix James with a stern glare. “ Most of the time.”
James waves me off. “Nah, you guys love me. I’m a blast.”
Ethan raises his mug. “I’ll drink to that.”
We relax on the couch for a bit, and we lose track of time until Stefano checks his phone before frantically gathering everyone into the living room.
After turning the TV to a channel that’s carrying a feed of the countdown, I dart out to my balcony and retrieve a case of the champagne.
I distribute the bottles and get ready, popping mine with great care once the countdown ticks to zero.
The room is loud, chaotic, and the vibes are immaculate. James and Ethan are hugging tightly, and that’s so wholesome.
As soon as I think that, the two of them decide to drunkenly make out with each other, which is slightly less wholesome.
But still, that is one attractive couple right there.
Seeing James and Ethan so nauseatingly in love makes me warm up inside.
They don’t invoke jealousy, but I know I want something like what they have.
Taking a massive swig of champagne, I settle onto the couch with my closest friends, and it looks like we’re all going to crash together like old times. We’re quieter now, joking, shooting the shit, and dozing off one by one, but my mind is elsewhere.
As Carl falls asleep on my shoulder, I put my empty glass down and think. What James said earlier about taking chances and jumping into the deep end was definitely a reflection on his recently realized bisexuality, but it’s still advice I can use.
It seems like everyone in my life who knows about Erik is telling me not to throw my feelings for him away. I don’t know what people see in my stupid crush, but those feelings aren’t going anywhere.
Hell, I might as well lean into them.
Right then and there, at 12:17 a.m., I make a decision.
Erik made the offer, and I’ll follow through.
If he’s still on board, I’m going to book a ticket.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25 (Reading here)
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45