Page 7 of Critical Doubt

"Didn't think you'd show up," Todd said, as he paused in front of him. He pulled out a cigarette and lighter, his hand shaking as he lit the flame.

Todd looked as bad as Ryker felt. His eyes were bloodshot, and the smell of smoke coming off his clothes told Ryker this wasn't Todd's first cigarette of the day. He'd also lost at least twenty pounds since he'd seen him last.

"You all right?" he asked.

"How could I be?" Todd returned, pain in his voice, anger in his brown eyes. "Paul's dead."

"How the hell did it happen?" He couldn't help voicing aloud the question that had been going through his head ever since he'd heard the news. "Paul gets drunk and decides to go up on the roof? Why?"

"Because he was messed up. Not that you would care."

"I do care."

"You have a hell of a way of showing it." Todd took a long drag and blew smoke into the cold afternoon air. "Paul was drinking too much. He was destroyed after Abby kicked him out, not that he was much better before that."

"Abby kicked him out? When?"

"Three weeks ago."

"Why?"

"Because he'd become a raging alcoholic. He couldn't find his feet, Ryker. He was completely lost. He felt worthless. His family life was just as bad. He didn't fit in with Abby and Tyler anymore. They were a solid unit, and they didn't need him. They were used to him being gone. He was even jealous of Abby's friend Colin, saying he'd be a better husband to Abby and father to Tyler. I told him that wasn't true, but Paul started thinking Abby would be better off without him."

"Damn. I had no idea."

"How would you know? You haven't returned a call or a text in nine months."

He had no defense, and he didn't think Todd would tolerate any excuse he tried to make.Why should he?He'd let them down—all of them.

"When did you move here? I thought you were in Jacksonville with your mom," he said.

"I was, but her Alzheimer's worsened, and she didn't know me anymore. It got too depressing to visit her, and with Paul having rough times, I decided to move to Dobbs. I've been working with a private security firm out of Atlanta. When I'm not on assignment, I'm here. I tried to get Paul to come on board with the firm. They have some jobs that don't require field work, but he said he wasn't a desk guy and he'd have to figure something else out."

"I can understand that," he muttered.

"I heard you're a fisherman now."

"Yes."

"And you're living on a boat?"

"It's great. No commute."

"Sounds boring as shit."

"Boring works for me."

"It never used to."

"Well, it does now."

"How did we end up like this?" Todd muttered, giving him a look of confusion. "We were the best of the best, Ryker. We were changing the world. And then it all blew up—literally." He paused. "I keep thinking about our last mission. We had bad intel, but where did it come from? Did someone sell us out? Was it just an honest mistake? Or did one of us screw up?"

"I've been asking the same questions, not that it matters anymore. We can't change what happened."

"Carlos and Leo should be alive. You, Paul, and Mason shouldn't have been injured, shouldn't have been tossed out the way you were. That's one reason why I quit. I couldn't stand how you all were treated. Hank felt the same way."

He didn't know what to say. Todd's anger was ramping up, and maybe that was a good thing. Perhaps it was the only way he could deal with the immense guilt and blame that he was feeling.