Page 3 of Critical Doubt

"I should go back inside," Abby said, with a guilty gleam in her eyes. "My mother will be very upset with me for walking out like that."

"She'll get over it. No one is going anywhere. You're entitled to take a little time for yourself."

"It does feel better out here."

"You're not too cold?" It was February, with the temp in the low sixties, and at half-past four, the sun was already starting to slip past the trees.

"I don't mind the crisp air. It makes it easier to breathe. I feel like a coward, Savannah, hiding out here. I need to be stronger."

"You're doing great. The service was lovely. The reception is very nice. There's food and alcohol, and everyone knows each other. It's all going just as it should."

"It's good to have you here, Savannah. I wasn't sure you'd make it. I know you're busy with work."

"Work will be there when I get back to it. You're like my sister; you know that."

"And you're mine. But speaking of family…"

She saw the troubled look in Abby's eyes. "You don't have to say it. I know my father is probably coming."

"He said he was. I didn't see him in the church, but he sent me a note of condolence and said he'd be attending the funeral. He was friends with Paul's father, and I guess he feels an obligation to pay his respects."

"He's big on obligation when it comes to his fellow soldiers. And besides being friends with Paul's father, he liked Paul a lot. He always said Paul was one of his best students at sniper school."

"Paul had a lot of respect for him, too, even though I told him what a shithead your dad had been to you."

"I appreciate that, but I never wanted you or Paul to take sides."

"I know. I always thought it was a little crazy that Paul could be such a good sniper, which required him to be still, patient, unemotional, detached…he was never that guy at home. He was always moving a mile a minute. He was warm and funny, and he got emotional when he saw a stray dog in the neighborhood."

She smiled at that memory. "I remember when you had four dogs, because Paul couldn't stop rescuing them."

"And then Tyler's allergies kicked in, and we had to find them all good homes." Abby sighed. "Paul was a good guy."

"Of course he was." She wondered why there seemed to be doubt in Abby's eyes. "Am I missing something?"

"It's just that Paul's emotions went haywire after he was injured, after he realized he couldn't go back to his team, because he had nerve damage in his hand and arm. He didn't know what to do with himself."

"It's difficult for a lot of soldiers to start over, especially when the choice isn't theirs."

"I tried to be understanding; I really did. But it wasn't enough." Abby teared up. "Damn, you'd think I'd be done crying by now."

Savannah dug into her bag and pulled out a pack of tissues. "I came prepared."

Abby wiped her eyes. "Thanks."

"Is there anything else I can do to help?"

"Turn back time."

"I wish I could. I still don't understand how it happened." She regretted her words as soon as she said them, because more anguish entered Abby's eyes.

"I'm pretty sure it's my fault."

"Your fault? That's impossible."

"My mom blames me. I've seen it in other people's eyes, too."

She was shocked at Abby's words. "Why would your mother hold you responsible for Paul drinking too much and falling off a roof he shouldn't have been on in the first place?"