Page 63 of Critical Doubt
"Let me ask it a different way," she continued, as he started the car. "What were the personalities on the team? How did it break down?"
"Carlos was the family man with his wife and four kids. He sometimes felt like the dad in the group, always looking out for us. He was the guy everyone talked to when they had a problem. Mason was super smart. He could calculate patterns, measure distance, assess tactical strategies within seconds. He was also the most computer savvy. Leo was a pilot trapped in a ranger uniform. His head was always in the clouds, and his favorite pastime was making airplanes out of whatever paper he could find. But he never found a way to make it into the sky."
"That's too bad."
"Hank was the warrior," he continued. "Hank was aggressive and competitive. If there was a bar fight, he would be in the middle of it. If you needed someone to have your back in that fight, he'd be there, no questions asked. Paul was the one who made everyone laugh and was the biggest talker. He was almost always upbeat and optimistic. Todd was the worrier, the most pessimistic and nervous, but when it was showtime, he usually pulled it together."
"And how did you fit in?"
"I made the tough calls, the critical decisions. I led and they followed. I thought I had their respect. Now, I'm not so sure."
"Was your isolation only because of the bells in your head? Or did you feel like you'd let them down on your last mission? Was it guilt that kept you from getting in touch?"
He didn't answer immediately, and she thought she might have pushed him too hard. Then he said, "You're right, Savannah. There was guilt in the mix. I let the team down. Carlos and Leo died because I didn't realize our intel was bad. I led us into that ambush, Savannah. It's on me."
"Or it's on the bad intel. I worked in intelligence. I know that sometimes leads are bad, sometimes assumptions are wrong. It happens."
"It's still on me. I was the leader."
She thought he was being too hard on himself, but she also understood why he felt the way he did.
"What did your fellow soldiers think of you?" he asked, changing the subject.
"Me? They probably thought I should have shut my mouth more often and followed orders without question. I had a difficult time doing something I didn't believe was right. And I hated not being able to see the investigations all the way through. I was only allowed to gather intel, not act on it. That was frustrating. I might have complained a bit too much."
"I'm sure you still did a good job."
"I tried. But I'm so happy to be doing what I'm doing now."
"It's good that you found your true calling."
"When I left the military, I had no idea what I was going to do, where I was going to land. For the first time in my life, I was making my decisions only for myself. It was scary and thrilling at the same time."
"You like it when it's scary and thrilling."
She smiled at the knowing gleam in his eyes. "You might be right."
Fifteen minutes later, they arrived at Spear Enterprises. The military weapons defense company sat on a ten-acre campus with two six-story office buildings and two large barn-like, windowless buildings for production and testing. There was a great deal of security at the front gate, and it took them almost thirty minutes to get from the gate to the lobby of the office building. From there, they were told to wait as Mason was in a meeting.
Ryker seemed too restless to sit, getting up, pacing across the room, thumbing through a magazine, then dropping it on the table and walking toward the window. She could feel his tense energy and hoped that Mason would give them a better reception than Hank had.
As the nearby elevator doors opened, she stiffened as a man walked into the lobby. "Damn!" she murmured. "Why is he here?"
Chapter Fifteen
Savannah couldn't believeher father was at Spear today. He only consulted on a part-time basis. What were the odds that he'd be here now?
Her dad saw her and stopped in surprise. For a split second, she thought he might just walk on by. She could see on his face that he wanted to do just that. But duty made him turn in her direction. She got to her feet as he approached.
"What are you doing here, Savannah?" His gaze moved to Ryker. "And why are you with Stone?"
"We're here to see Mason Wrigley."
"Why? I thought you were in Dobbs, taking care of Abby."
"Did you hear that Todd is dead?"
His lips tightened. "Yes. I can't believe it. I was just speaking to Bill about it. I never thought those boys would take their own lives like that."
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