Page 53 of Crazy In Love (Love & War #2)

FOX

“The cake’s confirmed and set to be delivered by the bakery.

Seating’s being organized by the guys.” I work down my checklist, walking with Alana now that she’s part of the planning process.

“Catering’s done, music’s ready, and the guest list is pretty freakin’ plump.

” I come to a stop in the gym’s doorway, in the section between the front desk and the room that holds a regulation-sized boxing ring.

Lucky for us, Tommy and Chris are sparring, and even if I pretended to be an evolved human being turned off by the sight of blood, the long line trailing from Chris’ lip is, admittedly, enormously sexy.

I’m no better than a neanderthal.

Whatever.

“They make quite the sight, don’t they?” I lean against the doorframe, folding my arms and tucking my little notebook and pen against my side.

“I could’ve sworn, when I got off the plane, they were identical.

You could put them side by side and demand I tell you who was who. It would’ve been impossible.”

Alana cradles Hazel against her chest, one hand beneath her butt and the other behind her head. Already, the sweet girl is gaining weight and growing at a ridiculous speed. “What do you see now?” she wonders. “Not the same?”

“No.” I drag my lip between my teeth and command my heart to calm the hell down.

You’re close to the end, Fox. Don’t make a dick of yourself now .

“I see two completely different men. They walk different. Talk different. They smile different. Their eyes are exactly the same, but…” I glance across and meet her gaze. “They’re different.”

Impressed, she drops her chin in a gentle nod.

“I’ve only ever known them that way. I don’t recall a single moment in my life where I looked at them and saw two of the same.

” Her lips curl higher as she looks their way again.

“You wanna talk to me about whatever the hell is going on between you and Chris yet?”

Stunned, my eyes flare wide and my heart skitters to a stop. And when I’m not sure I’ll keep my lunch inside my stomach, I snatch her hand and pull her along the hall.

“Hang on!” She laughs, walk-running and readjusting her grip on the baby. When I zoom straight past Tommy’s office door, she yanks me back and slings me through, slamming it shut again until the crash startles Hazel.

Frenzied, panicked—sick to my stomach—I toss my notebook and walk laps of the minimal, non-messy portion of floor space. “Who told you?”

“Who told me what?” She presses her back to the door and slides down, sitting on her butt and cradling the baby against her chest. “That you look at each other while we’re eating dinner, and my vagina gets a little tingly because of it?”

“Alana!”

“That you argue less and smile more? That he’s been seeing someone, and you’ve been seeing someone, but neither of you are naming names, and not a single member of the grapevine gossip mill has any clue?”

“Oh, God.” I run my fingers through my hair. “Shit.”

“That Cliff suddenly needs a security detail, but only after I suggested he and you date?”

“What?”

“Or that I just feel it?” She stares at the side of my face, warming my flesh and grinning because she knows it.

“I feel his happiness, Fox, and I feel yours. I can’t be in the same room as the two of you without getting caught up in your nasty web of lust and secrets and sneakiness when you think I’m too busy to pay attention. ”

“I’m sorry.” I spin and rush across the room, dropping into a crouch and desperately searching her eyes. “I swear, I came to Plainview with the purest of intentions. I was here for you. To help you. Not me.”

“Why are you sorry?” She frowns. “You didn’t steal my man, and no matter how possessive I am of him, my possession only extends as far as a sister’s would. His love life is entirely his own.”

“I’m sorry because I didn’t tell you! Because I kept it a secret. Because I was sneaking around, which is basically the same as lying. And we don’t lie.” I take her hand in mine, my thighs burning, but I don’t dare stand again.

This is my penance.

This is my moment of reckoning.

The one I was terrified of.

“It was never, ever, ever meant to be a lie, Alana. It was just… fun. And hot. And really, really crazy.”

“I’m sure it was,” she snickers.

“And then it just happened. This thing I thought would happen only once. But before we were done the first time, I knew I’d want more. God,” I moan. “I knew you’d freak out if you found out.”

“Why the hell would I freak out? When have I ever given you the impression I would be upset about this?”

“You mean the six hundred million times you’ve talked about how protective you are of him?

Or the seventy million times you explained to me, in fine detail, how no bitch would ever be good enough, and if you ever found yourself in a position where names had been named and his feelings were hurt, you’d take a baseball bat and rearrange her slutty brains? ”

“Well…” She softens her scowl to something kinder. “Okay, so I probably said those things. But you’re no random bitch, Fox. You’re my bitch.” She gives my hand a tug and pulls me around to sit on the floor beside her. And when I think I might cry, she hands the baby across and seals my fate.

Tears itch the backs of my eyes.

“You’re a top-tier, high-quality bitch,” she croons.

“You’re my very best friend in the whole world.

So if Chris catches feelings for someone and that someone is you, I’m not grabbing my baseball bat.

Except,” she adds, turning her head and studying the side of my face, “to threaten his brains. Because once you’re involved, my protection transfers.

” She strokes my arm. “From him to you.”

I blink, blink, blink the hot, salty tears from my vision. “Really?”

“Yes! He knows I have his back, Fox. He knows I’d mess a bitch up for stepping wrong, but you’re just…

” She places her hand on my shoulder, squeezing just tight enough to make it feel like a hug.

“You’re honestly the prettiest, smartest, kindest, most amazing person I have ever met, but you still have this annoying voice in the back of your brain that cuts you down.

It’s like you think your dad cutting out on you was somehow your fault.

Or that your mom leaving was the natural next step, and like that was on you, too. ”

And there they go, my tears slipping from the corners of my eyes. “I probably shouldn’t have told you those things. I never tell anybody.”

“I’m glad you did. Because even if I think you’re the greatest freakin’ catch on both sides of the civil war, I don’t disregard the doubt you carry every single day.

I don’t ignore that voice that insists on hurting you.

Even if I think it’s unwarranted. Even if I think you’re crazy and I would kill for your legs… and your ass…”

I choke out a soft laugh.

“And your tits, too. Since they’re way perkier than mine.”

“You’ve had two kids. Mine are still untouched… mostly.”

“Ew! That’s my brother you’re talking about!

” She slides her hand down and wraps her fingers around my wrist. “None of what I think erases the damage those assholes did to you. So despite how beautiful and worthy and special you are, I’m not blind to the pain and doubts weighing you down.

If you’re asking me who I think Chris deserves, and who I think you deserve, then I promise, I’m tossing you together every single time.

You’re my favorite people, Fox. You have to know I’ve kinda wished for this outcome. ”

I drop my head back and release a tired groan. “I was so worried you’d lose your shit.”

“Then you don’t know me, bitch .” She leans closer and rests her cheek on my shoulder. “Can I be the maid of honor at your wedding?”

“Oh, God!” I scoff so loud, the sound scrapes along my throat and leaves behind a scratchy ache. “There will be no wedding.”

“Why not? Did you forget that thing I said about feeling your happiness when you’re together?”

“Did you forget that bit where we agreed not to tell you? Where we agreed not to tell anyone . And he was so on board. I asked a week or two ago if we could go out to dinner. In public. He snuck me into his house instead. I suggested we go for a walk down Main Street. We could buy ice cream and just stroll. He countered with going to bed instead.” I shake my head.

“He’s not interested in more, Alana. And he’s definitely not interested in letting anyone else see us. ”

“Because you asked him not to!” She squeezes my arm and waits for my eyes to come down. “I’m gonna hold your hand when I tell you this; you asked him for secrecy. That’s what he’s giving you.”

“I asked for dinner at a restaurant. He didn’t bite.”

“Because it contradicts your initial request! He responds to direct communication, Fox. Not hints. Not subtlety. If you wanted dinner out, you needed to say ‘ Chris, snookums, I’m ready to go public now. I’m not afraid of Alana hurting me, so let’s walk Main Street and hold hands.

Then we’re gonna go bang on Alana’s bed . ’”

I search her eyes and show her a taunting smile.

Anything to see her lips crinkle.

“You did it on my bed?!” she explodes. “Dammit, Fox! He’s practically my brother! How could you?”

“I’m kidding! Ouch.” I catch her hands and hold on tight. “I’ve never disrespected your bed like that. I promise.”

Say it, Fox. Finish it. Pay the piper.

“Um… Your couch, though…”

“Dude!”

“It wasn’t my fault! He was sitting there, and I had your… Oh…” I grit my teeth. “I had your cute sleep shorts on, which have perfect sneaky penis gaps.”

“Fox!”

“I wanna say I’m sorry. Truly, I do. But I have bigger things to worry about right now than the cum stain on your couch cushion.”

“I’m reconsidering the baseball bat brains thing,” she growls. But despite the rage in her voice, she wraps my arm in hers and snuggles in with the gentlest touch. “Why are you worried about telling him how you feel?”