Page 9 of Conveniently Theirs (Viva Las… Oh, Sh!t)

nine

Josh

I shouldn’t have kissed her like that. But her beauty, her talk of consummation, the movement of her full, plump lips captivated me. I want her. Need her with every fiber of my being. And she’s pulling away.

“You don’t need to tell me, Josh. I know you’re in love with Devin.

I’m so glad, so happy for that love. I’m more than willing to do anything—even fake marry you—to keep the two of you together.

I’m willing, so you don’t owe me anything.

” Her gaze drops to where she’s twisting the fabric of her dress again. “You don’t need to pretend.”

I press my finger to her lips to stop her from saying more. “Yes, darlin’, I really do need to tell you this. Will you listen without interrupting?”

There’s a shimmer of tears along her lower lashes. Dear god, I don’t want to make her cry. What if she freaks out? A deep breath helps clear the negativity from my thoughts. No matter what her reaction, at least my secret won’t stand between us any longer.

She nods, makes the closing zipper signal across her lips, and focuses on me.

This is more difficult than I anticipated and I realize I’m actually coming out. Again. Never thought about it in this way before. “Keni, darlin’, you’ve always known me as a gay man.”

Another nod. Her lips twitch like she’s fighting not to speak. She won’t be able to keep that unspoken promise for long.

“And for most of my life, that’s how I saw myself as well.

You’ve always been my best friend. Yet there were times…

are times…even back in high school when I wanted more than that with you.

I didn’t understand how that could be and I fought the feelings.

When I met Devin in college, I thought everything would fall into place.

Until those strange feelings reappeared. ”

Her brows are low over the question in her eyes. “ I’m sorry. I have to ask. What are you talking about?”

“Devin helped me realize that I’m bisexual. That I can also feel love and desire for women. No, I take that back. I love and desire only one woman. Once I admitted to myself I’ve been in love with you since forever, well that’s when life just seemed right.”

“Me? But, what about Devin?”

“Why does love need to be limited to only one person? I love Devin with all my heart. He’s in permanent residence there. He is the man I love. I have a heart as big as infinity. Kendall, you are also a part of my heart. You, darlin’, are the woman I love.”

“Does Devin know?”

“He’s the one who recognized my feelings for you. He made me see you and the possibilities.”

Processing my words, she searches my face. Please let her see the truth of my love. Refusing to fidget under her scrutiny, I straighten my spine.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“Fear.”

“Of what?”

“Rejection.”

“Josh, I’ll never reject you. How could I? I’ve been in love with you since forever, too. God, I’ve wanted to tell you for so long but I was—shit, just like you I’m afraid of rejection.”

My laugh is tinged with bitterness. “How did we both end up so confused and afraid of our feelings?”

“We both thought you were gay.” Her smile fades. “Does all this have anything to do with our fake marriage? Is it part of your plan?”

“No. Uncle Harold’s new will was a complete surprise. Just so you know… Devin has been pushing me to tell you for a few years.”

“I don’t understand. Why would Devin do that?”

“Love. He’s seen my confusion. Helped me through the depths of my mixed up emotions. Encouraged or silently supported me, whatever I needed.”

“So what do we do now?”

I send a silent prayer I’m really seeing hope and desire in her eyes. “I love you madly, Kendall. I desire you. Need you. I want to make love with you.”

She takes my hand. “I have a secret too… besides how long I’ve been in love with you, too.”

My heart pounds. Clueless, I wait for her to continue.

“All those guys I’ve gone out with?”

I deny the rise of jealousy with a nod .

“I was looking for someone like you, only someone who wanted me. Who could want me. Because we were stupid and kept our love secret from each other. I never found that guy. Never came close. I never met anyone I wanted to be intimate with. If you really want me, you’ll be my first.”

First? Dear god. “You’re a virgin?”

Her cheeks flame a deep red. “Technically, yes. But…” She grins and her nervous chuckle brings my smile. “If you’re looking for virgin blood or anything like that, the sheet observers will be disappointed. I may not have had a man, but I do love toys.”

Her smile turns sweetly seductive. I stand and pull her to her feet. “Wanna consummate, darlin’?”

“Oh yes. Please. I am so done with waiting.”

In her room I partially close the drapes, allowing a sliver of muted light into the room.

Then I turn her so her back is to me and draw down her dress’s long zipper.

I kiss each inch of exposed skin, making myself go slow.

I will make this so good for her. For both of us.

“So sweet,” I whisper against her neck as the silky fabric pools around her feet.

“Yes, Josh.” She turns and unbuttons my shirt, using the same distracting kisses down my chest and abs. Then she steps back and reaches to unfasten her bra. While she slips out of her skimpy panties, I shove down my slacks and briefs.

We face each other naked for the first time.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Keni.”

Her gaze lingers on the rising presence of my dick. “You are, too, Josh. So… can I touch you?”

“God, yes, darlin’. Lay down with me and you can touch all you want. As long as I’m permitted to do the same.” I toss back the duvet and prop my shoulders on a pile of pillows. “Come here, Keni.”

She joins me on the bed and kisses me. The press of her lips is slow and tentative. I match the easy motions, building heat, desire, need.

Her hands move over my body, an easy exploration that avoids my throbbing dick. Probably a good thing. I need to regain my slipping control. I plump her full breasts, brushing my thumbs around her areolas before taking one firm nipple into my mouth.

With a desperate cry, her hands cup my head, her fingers curl and her nails scratch over my scalp. Shards of need rocket to my groin and I rub my hard length against her hip.

“Oh, yes,” she moans. “Josh, I…”

“I need…” Instead of voicing that need, I slide down her body and press a kiss to the edge of her lu sh, soft curls. Easing her legs apart, I settle between her thighs then take one long, leisurely lick to part her mound and discover her clit.

“Josh.” She lifts her hips.

I raise my head. “Don’t worry, darlin’. I may have only been with a couple women?—”

Her head jerks up and her thighs tighten around my shoulders. “You have?”

Guess I should have said something about this sooner. “Casual. When I was trying to figure out my true sexual identity. Uh, if it makes a difference, Devin was… involved in those meetups. So, anyway…” I use my fingers to part her folds. “I do have a clue about what I’m doing.”

“A clue?” she sighs.

“You let me know.” I press the flat of my tongue against her clit then begin a slow, sensual lick that has her gasping and clutching the sheets. “You like that, darlin’?”

I double my efforts—and my enjoyment.

It’s not an effort to give her pleasure. I have years to make up for. Starting tonight. I add my fingers, teasing lower to discover her wet and swollen. She whimpers when I stroke around her entrance then slip a finger inside .

“More,” she demands then slaps her hand over her mouth.

Stopping my intimate kisses, I lift my head and wait until she looks at me. “Never be afraid to tell me what you want. What you need. I promise to do the same.” I lick my lips and smile. “And what I need right now is to taste the sweet heat when you come. Come for me, Keni.”

She tosses her head from side to side. With two fingers stroking her inner walls, I draw my tongue over her mound.

Her throat rumbling in a near growl, she spears her fingers through my hair to guide, then hold me in place.

Who am I to deny her anything? Soon I’m lost in the taste of her, the rising aroma of her arousal, the encouraging sounds she makes.

Her hands flatten against my skull. Her hips arch. I circle her clit with my lips and suck hard on the firm bundle of nerves.

Her sharp cry is music I’ll never tire of hearing. The hot, wet flow of her release covers my fingers. Resisting the urge to lick them clean, I continue dancing my fingertips along the contractions of her inner walls, softening the pressure against her clit.

“Josh, Josh, god Josh,” she mumbles.

One final internal caress before I draw my fingers up her body and ease into the perfect position to kiss her. She doesn’t allow me to go slow, her mouth demands worship from mine. Not long and we’re both gasping.

Brushing her hair back from her damp face, Keni’s swollen lips stretch into a tentative yet sultry smile. “So I can ask for what I want?”

“I need for you to do that, yes.”

“What you just did…”

I trace her mouth with my fingers the press against her lower lip until I can slip a finger into her mouth. “You like what I did? What we did?”

She sucks on my finger, sending shockwaves straight to my cock. With a soft kiss she releases my finger as I move to capture my throbbing cock between our bodies. I can’t stop the short thrusts of my hips against her.

“Josh, I need you to do that inside me. Is… is that something you’ll do with me? That you’ll enjoy? If not, I under?—”

Swallowing her words with my kiss, I take time to explore her mouth before replying. “Ask me again, darlin’.”

“Josh, I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything with me you’re not comfortable with.”