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CHAPTER 9

TANNER

I was torn between needing space and staying in the safety of Mahk’s arms forever. I was a bigger guy, so it was rare for me to be the one comforted. Normally, I didn’t mind. I liked being in charge, and I was a caretaker by nature, but every once in a while, it was nice to be on this side of things.

Plus, Mahk’s arms felt amazing. The way he held me so securely, there was no hesitation, none of the awkwardness that often came when cuddling wasn’t leading to sex. There was no impatience, no fidgeting. Mahk held on, making it clear he wasn’t going anywhere, even if he hadn’t said the words.

As amazing as it was, the rational part of my brain knew I needed to create some distance because I’d never be able to think clearly like this. I also needed to get home. I didn’t like leaving Jake home with everyone by himself at night, in case something happened. He hadn’t tried to call me, but in light of the conversation we’d had today, I was afraid he wouldn’t unless it was a bad emergency, in a way to prove to me that I needed him home.

That was another reason I had to take a step back from whatever was happening with Mahk. I didn’t want to stay away completely—I didn’t think I could. But a good night’s sleep and a little clarity would do me a world of good.

I shifted a bit on Mrs. Cunningham’s sofa to look Mahk in the eyes. He still had that cautious hesitance, like he was positive I would break things off and run the fuck away at any second. I tried to smile, hoping to let him know we were okay.

“I need to get home.”

He nodded solemnly. “Of course.”

Mahk disentangled himself from me and stood up, and then suddenly he was human again. That switch was going to give me whiplash. It took my brain a second to register why he’d changed appearances.

“You don’t need to walk me back. I’ll be fine.”

Yeah, that didn’t go over well. Mahk narrowed his eyes, his lips pursed as he thought. “If you do not want to walk with me, I understand. I will follow you.”

I couldn’t help it. I laughed. “Have you been following me home a lot, Mahk?”

He nodded, completely unashamed. “Almost always, unless I had a lead on Koth and had to work. But even then, I came to check on you afterwards.”

“You know, most humans frown on that kind of behavior. We call it stalking.”

He seemed to think about this, considering why we wouldn’t be okay with being followed without our knowledge.

“And you? Are you upset that I followed you? I had to make sure you were safe.”

Warmness filled my belly. I stood up and touched his now smooth and tan cheek. It was weird seeing him like this after seeing the true Mahk. I wondered why his human form was so short. While he was maybe four or so inches taller than my 6’3” as an orc, he was at least six inches shorter than me now. He was also narrower now, and I could easily wrap my arms around him and hold him there. I had so many questions about the magic. Did he choose what his human form looked like, or was it random? How did it actually work?

Anyway, none of that mattered right now. My brain was at max capacity, and I could wait for those little things. I had a question to answer, and the longer I took, the more concerned Mahk became. I could tell by the way he was stiffening and how his cheek twitched under my skin.

“No, I’m not. I should be, but I’m not. But from now on, you don’t hide in the shadows. I want to know you’re there.”

Mahk beamed. “Okay. I like that.”

“I like that too. Now, c’mon. I have to get back home. We can walk together.”

“I like that even better.”

I took his hand as I led him out, just to reinforce that even if I was fucking confused, I wanted him here, next to me.

The walk back to my house was quiet. We were both in our heads too much for any more conversation. The air was heavy, but it wasn’t awkward. It had never felt awkward with Mahk, even when it probably should have been. Being near him felt natural.

All too soon, I was standing in my front yard. The porch light flickered, leaving creepy shadows across the overgrown grass. I groaned. Guess I had to add replacing the light to my list. The lawn . . . Well, that could wait another week or two. Maybe.

All the lights were off in the house, including in my room, so Jake must’ve finally gone to sleep. I took it as a good sign as I turned toward Mahk.

“Thank you.” I rocked back on my feet, feeling a little awkward. “For walking me back, I mean.”

“Of course. Can I walk you to work in the morning?”

I’d never dated in high school. I hadn’t had time. Between taking care of my siblings and football, a boyfriend had been far from my mind. Besides a couple mutual blow jobs in the locker room, I really hadn’t done much until my semester in college. Even then, dating hadn’t been on the radar, but hooking up had become a priority.

But because of my lack of experience, I’d never gotten to have that curling your toes, giddy feeling when you first started seeing someone and it was new and exciting and big and scary. I’d never gotten to know what it was like to stand on the lawn of my mom’s house with my date, wondering if we were gonna kiss. I’d never gotten to sneak in late, trying not to wake up my family while my mind reeled from an amazing date.

Now, at twenty-fucking-three years old, I knew what all those teen movies were talking about. My stomach felt alive with butterflies, the anticipation heavy as Mahk and I stood so close, our hands still intertwined, knowing we had to end this but not sure how.

Of course, whenever I’d imagined this, it hadn’t been with a nearly 7-foot orc, but life liked to throw surprises my way.

“Yes,” I finally answered, my voice a little shaky. “I would like that a lot.”

Mahk batted those damn eyelashes and flashed me the sweetest smile, and I was a fucking goner. I wanted to kiss him so badly. I needed to know what he tasted like. Would he fight me for dominance, or would he yield so prettily? I had no business wondering that. Not after I was the one who’d asked to put the brakes on this so I could think, but my brain and body didn’t give a fuck.

“Can I kiss you?” I found myself asking without meaning to.

Mahk’s eyes widened, like he was as surprised by the question as I was. But I was in too deep now. I wasn’t turning back. Mahk nodded, a little dazed, and before I could process anything, my free hand cupped the back of his head, fisting some of his hair and tilting his face up.

Our lips touched.

It was innocent at first. No tongue, just lips pressed against each other. But then Mahk’s parted with a breathy sigh, and I took the invitation, leaning in and taking more—taking everything he was willing to give me.

Mahk yielded. Somehow, I’d known he would. Under that protective, stabby exterior was a sweet man with a possibly subby streak, and I was here for it. I licked at the seam of his lips, savoring his taste before breaking free.

“Fuck, little stalker, you are so sweet.” I kissed him again, unable to help myself. Then one more quick peck. “I can't get enough.”

“You can kiss me any time you’d like, Tanner. I always want to be kissed by you.”

I rested my forehead on top of his head. “You can’t say things like that to me, sweetheart. I’ll take it seriously.”

“I hope so. I am being serious.”

Fuck. It took all the self-control I had to back away. Space. I needed space. I needed to think about all the things I’d seen and heard today and not get swept away by all things Mahk. He thought we were fated mates, which yeah, that was a problem for tomorrow, but Mahk believed it wholeheartedly, and I wouldn’t tease him by getting his hopes up more than I already had. Space. If I kept saying it, maybe I’d actually do it.

“Goodnight, Mahk,” I whispered, taking a step back.

Mahk reached out like he was going to stop me but then forced his hand down. “Good night, Tanner.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, I will be here.”

I turned away, focusing on my house because if I looked at Mahk again, I probably wouldn’t go inside.

I made it to the door. It was unlocked because Jake always forgot to do it before bed, so I easily turned the handle and slipped into the dark house before glancing one last time. I could see him, standing in the flickering light, staring at me with laser-focused intensity.

I waved, like a dumbass, glad Mahk couldn’t see how red my cheeks were in the darkness. Or, hell, I hoped he couldn’t. I had no idea how good his eyesight was.

I closed the door, but then immediately ran to the window, desperate for one more glance, but Mahk was gone.