Page 38 of Chasing After You

The elevator ride up to my floor felt longer than usual, like the building was holding its breath along with me. I hadn’t stepped foot in my apartment in weeks. I half-expected something to be flooded or on fire when I opened the door.

But when I pushed the door open, it was… fine.

Besides the plant I’d forgotten about on the windowsill. That was definitely dead.

My apartment was small, but tidy. There were a few dishes in the sink that had a slightly musty smell. A hoodie with my college’s baseball team logo hung over the back of the couch where I’d left it. The bed was unmade as it always was. I walked in slowly, setting my bag down just inside the door, toeing off my sneakers beside it.

After briefly scanning the room, I sighed. I flopped onto my couch, grabbing a throw blanket and wrapping it around myself.

I should’ve felt safer now. I should’ve been glad to be back in my own space. But the strange thing was… I missed the noise of Oliver’s place. The thrum of the twins moving around upstairs. The smell of breakfast coffee already brewing when I woke up. The feeling of someone always being nearby. Even the sarcastic comments that were aimed at me.

Now, I was alone again.

I stared up at the ceiling and wondered what Dorian was doing right now. What did he do in his free time? Did he still like watching movies?

My phone buzzed next to me.

Dori ??:

Did you get home safely?

Me:

Yep, all good.

Dori ??:

Great.

Can’t wait to see you on Wednesday.

Me:

Same.

Did you have anything specific you wanted to do?

Dori ??:

Anything.

Just need to be with you.

I swallowed hard before shaking my head to rid myself of any wayward thoughts.

Me:

Sounds good. We can decide that night.

I’m going to get some rest. You should too.

Dori ??:

Sleep well, big bro.

I set the phone down on the coffee table, face down, like turningit over would turn my brain off, too.

The silence in the apartment suddenly felt louder than I remembered. Every creak and hum pressed into my skin, reminding me how long it had been since I’d spent a night here alone. I got up to lock the deadbolt and double-check the chain. Then I wandered into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water, which I barely sipped.