Page 44 of Changeling (The Incubus Saga #2)

Jim drove. None of them spoke much. They reached the next town and checked into a new motel after only a few hours—just one room, since it seemed neither Sasha nor Jim wanted to leave Nathan alone.

Nathan was starving, and was thankful when Jim offered to run out and bring back something for them to eat, even though his stomach was still twisted from whatever he’d been drugged with the night before.

Once they were alone, Sasha studied him carefully. Nathan knew he was moving like a man over three times his age. “How are you feeling?” Sasha asked. He pointed out the ibuprofen and water Jim had left on the table.

“Better. Just nauseous.” Nathan swallowed the pills, took a breath, and finished the water in the bottle. He knew he was a little dehydrated too. He felt like shit. In fact, he felt like shit on Tuesday’s toast. He sank down on one of the beds.

Sasha came to sit beside him, close enough that they were almost touching. “Nate, talk to me.” His voice was quiet, almost but not quite pleading.

“‘Bout what?” Nathan did not want to have this conversation. Not now. Not a hundred years from now.

“Last night. What really happened?”

“I was stupid. Underestimated them. Got the shit beat out of me. I thought the whole thing was pretty obvious.”

“You weren’t the stupid one though, were you?”

“Huh?” Nathan turned to look at Sasha.

“I got you beat up, didn’t I?” Sasha’s voice was hard, accusing.

“What? Who said that?” Nathan was going to kill Jim.

“Nobody had to say it, Nathan. I’m not stupid. Though you may doubt that after last night.” Sasha looked at the floor. “I saw your jeans…the way the button and zipper were cut away...”

Shit. Nathan should have made sure his ruined clothes were better hid.

“I haven’t cared what people thought about my sexuality for a long time—well never actually.

I love you, Nathan, and I don’t care who knows it.

But that wasn’t what last night was about.

I let you down as a friend, as a partner.

I didn’t have your back. And you were weaker going into that fight…

because I fed from you.” Sasha’s voice resonated with the anguish that was clearly written on his face.

Then his expression hardened. “I’m going to kill them,” he ground out, anger pushing everything else aside.

“ No .” Nathan grabbed Sasha’s arm. “You will not. You will let. This. Go.”

“Nathan, you can’t expect me to just sit by and let someone hurt you.”

Nathan scowled. “Hey, didn’t we have this conversation the other way around recently? This isn’t your fault. We couldn’t have known those goons would jump me. I understand you want to help, that you want to be there for me, just like I want to be there for you, but I can look after myself.”

“Yeah, I can certainly see that.” Sasha’s scathing tone mirrored the anger in his gaze, which moved up the length of Nathan’s body.

“Well screw you, too, then,” Nathan shot back.

He stood from the bed and moved straight for the bathroom, though only partially because he felt like hurling the nothing in his stomach into the toilet one more time.

He couldn’t stand the look on Sasha’s face; he couldn’t stand this conversation.

He slammed the bathroom door behind him.

“Nathan!” Sasha shouted through the door.

For a moment, Nathan wondered if Sasha would come after him, but after a brief pause, he heard angered shuffling, and finally the door opening. It didn’t slam. Instead, Nathan heard Jim call out, probably having just narrowly missed running into Sasha.

“Hey! What about the food?”

“I’m not hungry. Don’t wait up. I’ll be late,” Sasha called back.

Jim didn’t speak further, but Nathan heard the door gently close.

“Nathan? You can come out of hiding. He’s gone now,” Jim called at the bathroom.

Nathan emerged, at least not having actually thrown up again, and saw that Sasha had taken his coat and the guitar. “Shit. He thinks it’s his fault. I’m afraid of what he’s gonna do,” Nathan said as he sat at the table. He looked disinterestedly at the food Jim set down.

“Great idea getting in his face about it, then,” Jim said with a crooked smile, though his eyes softened the moment Nathan deflated. “We’ll talk to him tomorrow, Nate. Both of us. Now come on, you have to eat something. I brought you some soup and toast.”

Nathan managed a smile, looking gratefully up at his brother. “Thanks, Jim.”

After devouring most of his food, Nathan turned in fairly early and fell into a restless sleep.

Nathan opened his eyes to a reddish haze that covered everything.

He saw a world barren and black with red dripping along the horizon.

There was no sun, no point of light, and yet something was glowing enough to illuminate the land, land that was so hot, heat waves radiated up from it.

Trees that should be filled with leaves were burnt away.

Husks of ash stood lining empty, broken streets, and Nathan knew those husks had once been people.

He alone walked untouched along the middle of some unknown, unimportant road in a town that no longer existed.

He trembled as the concrete cracked and melted beneath his feet where he walked.

“Jim! Sasha!” Nathan called out, because what other names could be important in an empty world.

“Nathan…” came a whisper.

Nathan turned quickly to stare down the road behind him. The land was so flat, he could see for miles in every direction and everything looked like the surroundings beside him—black, barren, dead .

There was a hill not far away that might have had grass once. Sasha and Jim were at its peak looking down at him. But Sasha was changed, his incubus self, with black wings out and ready for flight even though he was crouched by Jim’s feet. His fangs glistened within a sickly smile.

Jim radiated power, his eyes glowing amber with prominent slits, as his hand reached out to beckon Nathan forward.

Then Nathan’s view changed, and he was suddenly looking down at himself as he walked toward the hill.

His heart clenched tight at the sight of himself.

His figure appeared to be just him at first, in jeans and a black T-shirt.

His boots were clean somehow of all the dirt and ash of the land.

He smiled up at Sasha and Jim, and that’s when Nathan realized that the light, the meager light keeping the world from being utterly consumed by darkness was coming from him . But it was flickering, fading away…

What was worse was that Nathan’s eyes flickered too, changed shape until they were slit.

“Come on,” Nathan said with a voice that hissed and roared. “We have work to do.”

His eyes flickered again, no longer their soft, natural green…but red on black.

“Nathan! Wake up! It’s just a nightmare!” Jim’s raised voice came out of seemingly nowhere, and while Nathan was conscious of it, recognized it, he still woke up swinging.

The next thing Nathan knew, he was sat up in bed, having narrowly missed clocking Jim in the nose, and only because his brother had weaved back to get out of the way and ended up on his ass on the floor for his troubles.

“Dude, what the hell?” Nathan blinked blearily around him, groaning softly at his sudden rousing. He was sweating and shaking—but he couldn’t remember why.

“You were having a nightmare. You okay now?” Jim’s concerned face hovered over him as he stood up to smooth the covers back around Nathan.

“I’m fine, Jim. Just a dream. Go way.” Nathan swatted Jim’s hands, embarrassed by the attention, and shut his eyes again.

“Fine,” Jim huffed and moved to the other bed.

Nathan stirred restlessly in attempt to fall back asleep, but eventually gave up and went to the bathroom. He leaned against the door as vague flashes of red on black eyes and feelings of dread came over him, pulling him back to the nightmare.

“I’d rather not remember, thanks…” Nathan grumbled, closing his eyes tight to banish the renewed images.

“Nathan…” came a faint voice, barely recognizable as Walter.

Nathan opened his eyes, glancing about the bathroom until he spotted Walter flickering in and out of visibility beside the shower. “Dude, don’t strain yourself. Jim’s just on the other side of the door.”

“I know, Nathan, but I wanted you to know that Sasha…hasn’t returned yet.”

Straining to hear Walter’s crackling words as he continued to flicker like television static, Nathan frowned when he registered what had been said. He hadn’t realized Sasha was still out when he rushed for the bathroom. “I should have sent you after him…” Nathan shook his head.

“I did follow him, for a time, but could only go so far,” Walter said.

“Far?” Nathan frowned. “He took off? Where did he go?”

“I am not certain, Nathan…but it appeared to be the direction you had come from.”

Fuck . Nathan nearly slammed a fist back into the door, but didn’t want to alert Jim.

Instead, he thanked Walter, allowed his Spirit Guide to fade from view again, and tried to gather his thoughts as he used the toilet.

He couldn’t go after Sasha without knowing exactly where he’d gone, but he had a pretty good idea.

When he left the bathroom, he glanced over at the other bed to find Jim lying on top of the blankets but still fully clothed. Sasha was nowhere to be seen.

Nathan stifled a groan as he lay back down on the empty bed. It didn’t take long for him to fall back to sleep, despite the threat of further nightmares, as his recovering body fought to heal.

Nathan awoke this time to the welcoming smell of coffee like the morning before, and felt warm breath on the back of his neck.

He knew that the moment he moved, his current state of bliss would be shattered, so he stayed still for a moment to enjoy it.

At least the drug hangover was gone. He felt Sasha behind him and it felt right and safe to have him there.

Jim was beside the bed as soon as Nathan sat up, ready with a handful of pills and more water. Nathan smiled tightly in thanks and downed them.