Page 48 of Carry On (Love Doesn’t Cure All #4)

LINCOLN

Icouldn’t sleep. My mind bounced all over the place as I lay there in the silence, listening to Nash breathing. I counted each soft and steady breath, using it to ground me to the best of my ability. I needed something to keep me from spiraling.

Suicide attempts.

He was a frequent flyer in multiple hospitals for suicide attempts.

I struggled to wrap my head around that singular sentence. How many times did someone have to attempt suicide to be considered a frequent flyer?

How had he…

And why?

When was the last time?

Was it recent?

A while ago?

Was he suicidal right now?

Every question led to another.

And another.

And one more.

I squeezed him tighter and curled around him, burying my face into the curve of his neck. Inhaling deeply, I let the scent of him consume me as I clung to him.

I knew just how dangerous it was to get close to him, but for the life of me, I didn’t care. It wasn’t about me and him or any kind of arrangement we’d made.

It was about just how broken he was… how ready he was to let the world go… and the fact that he needed someone in his corner. People didn’t need a relationship or insurance or any of that bullshit to be worthy of having support and help.

Nash needed help, but the kind of help he needed… I wasn’t sure I could give him. No amount of insurance could fix this. Could this be fixed?

Was there even anything I could do to help him?

Would being in his corner be enough?