Page 16 of Candy Hearts, Vol. 2

CHAPTER 16

CODY

This is probably the biggest leap of faith I have ever taken. I feel giddy with nerves as I travel up in the elevator, slipping my phone in my pocket after telling Ken that I’m coming. He arranged for me to have standing access to his apartment months ago, which is great because I didn’t want to have to wait for his doorman to approve my visit. I might have chickened out.

My stomach twists and clenches, and I’m equal parts excited and nauseated.

I feel more settled when the elevator opens into Ken’s foyer and I find him waiting for me. His expression is pensive, and I’m sure I’m to blame for that. Maybe I shouldn’t have opened with an SOS message, but I thought it was kind of clever and cute.

“Code—” he starts softly, but I interrupt him, needing to get my feelings out before I lose my nerve.

“No, let me speak. I canceled my date tonight. I actually canceled it on Monday. Well, I decided to cancel it on Saturday, but I had to do it in person and…that’s not the point.” I chuckle a little awkwardly at how badly I’m already messing this up. “The thing is, I never wanted to go out with Brad.”

“Cody…” he tries again, but I’m on a roll now and I just shake my head.

“Ken, I wanted you . It’s always been you. And after spending the past weeks with you…I can’t imagine letting anyone else touch me the way you do. Or touching anyone else the way I touch you. I don’t want anyone else’s kisses, only yours. And the thought of all the things we haven’t done yet…” I swallow roughly and step toward him, counting it as a good sign that he doesn’t back away. “I know you said you don’t do relationships, and…and if friends with benefits is all I can have…well, I’d rather that than nothing. Because I’ve missed you this week. I’ve missed our calls, and our dinners. I’ve missed making out on the couch and feeling your cock rubbing against mine.” I delight in the strangled sound my words pull from him, and it encourages me to keep going, to literally put it all out there. “And I want so badly for you to fuck me, Ken. Please . Tell me you don’t want it and I’ll leave, but…it’s Valentine’s Day, and this is me being confident and going for what I want. And what I want is you. Preferably as my boyfriend…partner…whatever. But…I just want you. Please tell me you want me, too.”

My heart sinks and the nausea returns as he closes his eyes and hangs his head, morosely whispering, “ Fuck , Cody.”

It’s not a rejection, but it’s not the enthusiastic agreement I had hoped for either.

But then he steps back and, with his handsome face contorted by a thousand emotions, most prevalently apology, he moves to the side and I suddenly get it.

Oh, boy, do I get it.

“Uh.” I swallow as my heart starts to hammer with a whole new level of embarrassment and panic, and I give an awkward little wave. “Hi Mom. Hi Dad.”

Dad’s face is almost purple, while Mom just looks amused. Then she breaks the tension by launching herself at Ken and hugging him tightly. “Welcome to the family!” she declares, then turns to look at Dad expectantly. “Right, Mike?”

Surprisingly, Dad nods, but he’s still an unhealthy bright pink color.

Then again, he did just hear me, his son, begging Ken, his best friend, to fuck me, so…yeah, the pink color is probably warranted. In fact, I feel like I’m matching it now.

“Mike…” Ken starts hesitantly, but Dad holds up his hand and shakes his head.

“You’re both adults. I’m not going to pretend I get it, seeing as you held him as a baby?—”

“Ew, Dad!” I say at the same time as Mom’s loud protest of “You’re making it weird, babe.”

“But I’m not going to fly off the handle, either. Though I could have done without hearing” —Dad waves his hand at me— “ that .”

“I didn’t know you were here,” I mumble, looking at my feet as my cheeks flame to match his.

“Well that much is obvious.” Dad sighs. “We, uh, we should get out of here. Let you two… talk .”

Please, God, just let the earth swallow me up already.

That seems to be a recurring thought for me in this apartment, now that I think about it. Maybe it’s cursed.

“Yeah,” Ken agrees, still sounding strained. “Yeah, okay. But, Mike, are…are we good here?”

Dad snorts, and some of the tension seems to lift with the sound. “You gonna treat my boy right, or do I have to give you the shovel talk?”

“Dad!” I’m torn between laughing and berating him. “We’re not going to bully Ken into being with me. I want him to choose that of his own free will.”

“Fine.” Dad makes a show of pouting. “Take away my fun, then.” No longer quite as red in the face, he extends a hand to Ken. “You’re still my bud even if you are stupid enough to turn my kid down,” he says, and I groan.

“ Dad… ”

Dad huffs. “Seriously? I can’t even manipulate him a little?” He turns to Mom. “This is your influence.”

“Oh no!” Mom says with exaggerated sarcasm. “Here” —she rubs her thumb and index finger together— “let me play you the world’s smallest violin.”

With Ken visibly relaxing, the tension starts to leave my shoulders, too. I’m still embarrassed that my parents overheard my filthy confession, but it’s good to know that Dad and Ken will still be friends. I know that was Ken’s biggest concern about them finding out about us and, while it might take Dad a little while to get used to it, it’s good to know that he’s not going to be a dick about it. If it came down to it, I don’t know if I could choose between my parents and my…whatever Ken is.

“Well, if I’m not allowed to make the asshole squirm, we might as well get going,” Dad says, lacing the words with amusement and fondness. As they climb into the elevator, he turns back to face us and points at Ken. “We are going to talk about this, though. Especially if you hurt him.”

The doors close before I can protest.

“Please don’t feel obligated— oof! ” My breath leaves my lungs as I’m pushed up against the nearest wall, but then Ken is slanting his lips over my own and any complaint I might have made is replaced by pleasured whimpers.

“So…” I breathe heavily when we part for air, taking in Ken’s mussed hair and glinting eyes. “…Um, hi?”