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Raya

He’s mine!

My man, my man, my fucking MAN!

It’s official. I got him.

Life is good .

But there’s bad news: today’s our last day here.

We have to leave the bubble, and I’m dreading it with everything in me.

Home means back to reality. Work. My father.

I really need to get this ring.

Ace gave me the roadmap yesterday, too. He wants me to let him in. I have to…tell him shit. He wants to know me. I can do it. I have to do it. But it will be a struggle.

We’re at the pool right now. We’ve been so busy fucking, we didn’t get the chance before today. I sit on the side, water up to my thighs, and stretch my arms over my head, letting the sun soak into my skin, my sunglasses shielding my eyes as I sip my strawberry daiquiri.

Ace is in the pool, swimming like an Olympic athlete, slicing through the water with smooth, easy strokes. My man is so fucking fine. Muscles rippling, back flexing, droplets glistening on his bronzed skin every time he comes up for air.

That’s all mine.

I’m so blessed.

I take my phone out, snapping a few quick shots. One of me, looking relaxed and unbothered. A few of him, for my private enjoyment. Then I go to his Instagram and hit the follow button from my real account.

I smile to myself, swirling my straw in my drink. I feel like a million bucks.

Then I notice something.

There’s a shark in the water in the form of a homely bitch. She looks spicy white, but it’s hard to tell. She’s been swimming past him for the last five minutes, real casual-like, pretending she’s just doing laps. But I see what’s going on. She’s orbiting him. Testing the waters.

It’s not overly crowded here, four families at most, so she has plenty of pool to swim in. It’s definitely deliberate.

Ace ain’t even paying her no mind, because bae is loyal like that, but she better watch herself. I’m on high fucking alert, bitch.

I sit up, adjusting my sunglasses, blood rushing in my head.

Here this bitch goes again.

This time, she bumps into him.

Ace comes up from underwater, wiping a hand down his face, blinking the water out of his eyes.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry, hon!” she gushes, smiling like the cat who ate the canary.

He shrugs, already moving past her. “You’re good.”

There it is. She eyefucks my man. The bitch with the bad spray tan and a bikini that’s a little too small for the body she thinks she has.

I take a slow sip of my drink, watching through my shades as she keeps pushing.

“Are you visiting?” she asks.

None of your fucking business, hoe.

“Yeah. With my girlfriend,” he says, gesturing to me.

I pretend I’m still on my phone, but I’m clocking everything. She sees me. She knows I’m right here. And yet, she rolls her eyes and keeps talking like I don’t exist.

“I’m here with my girls,” she says. “I actually saw you yesterday on the beach.”

Ace nods, already disengaging. “Cool. Hope y’all are having fun. It’s beautiful here.”

He’s too polite.

“It is!” she agrees, then she lowers her voice. “She’s not getting in?”

My jaw clenches.

He glances back at me. “Probably not.”

“Why?” she snickers. “Doesn’t wanna get her hair wet?”

I set my phone down and prepare to crash out on this hoe, but Ace beats me to it.

He makes a ‘what the fuck is wrong with you’ type of face and says, “Nah. She’s good right where she is. Sugar melts in the water.”

I try my best not to smile, I really do, but inside, I’m dying. It’s so corny and sweet.

I love him.

I’m so in love with him.

He swims over to me, leaving her right where she belongs—alone. I hope she drowns, but I’ll leave that up to the lord.

“Hey,” he says, swimming up between my legs. “You good?”

“I’m great,” I say, running my fingers over his damp waves. “I just don’t wanna leave.”

He rests his forearms on my thighs. “I know, baby. I wish we could stay. We’ll do a longer trip next time, I promise.”

I believe him.

Ace keeps his promises.

I move around the bathroom, gathering my things, my stomach twisting at the thought of going back to reality. To our separate homes. Back to text messages and dates.

I wanna live with him. Wake up to him. I’m ready to start our life together and live forever like we did this weekend.

Back home…there are obstacles.

Secrets.

Things I might not be able to hide if this keeps going like it has been.

I need to lock this down asap.

One last check of the counter, and I’m ready. Then I spot Ace’s cologne. A midnight blue bottle with Arabic writing on the front. I pick it up and put the nozzle to my nose, inhaling deeply, stifling a moan. It’s him .

Behind me, the shower runs. Steam curls through the air as Ace washes the chlorine off of him. He can’t see me. Probably can’t hear me, either.

I grab the bottle and walk it out to the room. There’s not much in my suitcase, but what’s there gets two to three sprays of Ace. I even spray my panties.

I put it back in its place, my gaze flickering over the rest of his things. A razor. A hairbrush. His durag. Deodorant.

His toothbrush.

An idea blooms in my head.

I remember Ace making that joke about spaghetti. His mama must be old-school southern like mine for him to be hip to that trick.

But this one?

I just conceived it.

The water’s still cascading, and Ace’s indecipherable hums fill my ears. I don’t know how long I have, so I swallow hard and bite the bullet before I’m caught.

It’s in my hand. With the other hand, I pull my panties to the side. A breath, then a quick flick of my wrist, and it’s inside of me, in the place that belongs only to him.

I check it for visual evidence before I return it to the counter. Satisfied, I finish packing, content with the fact that I know, and he never will.

The drive back is quiet, but cozy.

Ace keeps one hand on the wheel and the other resting on my thigh. His thumb rubs lazy circles into my skin, his grip firm and warm.

I steal glances at him whenever I can. Moderation is key; I don’t wanna freak him out. Because the truth is, I adore him. I would climb inside his skin and live as him just to know what it’s like to walk around being that amazing, all day every day.

But that would be a disaster. I wouldn’t get shit done. I’d be too busy pleasuring myself.

“Can I tell you something?” I say, angling my body toward his.

He takes his hand off of my thigh to turn the radio down. I wait until it’s back in its rightful place before I start.

“My mom basically…abandoned me,” I begin, swallowing hard. I hate that I have to give him this part of me, but it’s necessary. Deep breath.

“What I mean is…” I trail off, because this is hard for me, for many reasons.

Ace grabs my hand and squeezes.

“My parents didn’t have a good marriage,” I say, underselling the shit out of that. “Maybe abandon is the wrong word. I don’t know.” I take another deep breath. “She left because she wasn’t happy, and she didn’t take me with her. Or my brother.”

Ace’s brows knit together. “You have a brother.”

“Yeah. He’s in New York. We don’t speak.”

Another understatement.

“I told you my parents were separated,” I continue, “but really, they’re divorced.”

The corners of his mouth turn down, his grip on my hand loosening considerably.

“So you lied again.”

“I’m sorry. I just…you don’t understand how intimidated I was by your family,” I whine. “I was ashamed.”

“Of a divorce?” He looks appropriately skeptical of that, so I pivot.

“Of being abandoned by my mother. Your family is so close and loving.”

I’m lying my ass off now, but he looks like he’s buying it. He puts the squeeze on my hand again, and I sigh in relief.

“So y’all don’t talk at all?”

I conjure up some tears, even managing to sound choked up.

“I used to call her all the time, but she never answered. She was busy with her new family, so…” I trail off, adding a sniffle.

“Damn.” He shakes his head. “Alright, so we hate her, then?”

I hide my smile.

This man gets it. Bae fucking gets it .

It’s us against the world. My mama. His mama. We can hate them all as long as we got each other.

Here’s the truth, though. I stopped being mad at my mama a long time ago. She’s a selfish bitch, but she imparted a priceless lesson in self-preservation.

If you’re not happy, if you’re backed into a corner, if you’re in danger, you can stand your ground and fight. But you can also run. Leave the whole fucking world behind and start over. Her ass moved to Ohio and met some weak beta bitch named Larry, got him to marry her, and popped out two more crotch goblins to keep him on the hook.

Smart woman.

Do I like the fact that she treated me like a liability? Of course not. But I made my peace with it. Probably would have done the same thing if I had to. I can’t even hate the player, because that ruthless bitch taught me the game.

He glances over at me. “I appreciate you sharing that with me.”

I nod pitifully.

He goes to speak again, then stops. I think he’s unsure of what to say to me about this. I know what I wanna hear— I’ll never leave you, baby. I’ll die before I ever let you go —but I have to accept that it might be a while before he says it to me.

His phone buzzes.

Right in front of me, the name ‘Pop’ appears on the screen. For some reason, Ace disconnects bluetooth and lifts the phone to his ear.

Risking a ticket.

For what?

Now I’m irritated.

“Hey, Pop. What’s goin’ on?”

I keep my face neutral, staring straight ahead, but my ears are wide open. To no avail, of course, because I can only hear one side. But what I hear is enough.

“Okay…yeah. Hilton Head…”

This is about me.

Ace’s nostrils flare. “I don’t know…so?…well what did Mama say?”

His face falls.

“Look, I’m driving…I know. I heard you…we’ll talk about it when I get back…alright.”

Silence.

The orcas are circling.

But they won’t find my blood in the water.

“Your family doesn’t like me, right?”

He frowns. “Nah, they just—“ He stops, adjusting his grip on the wheel. “They don’t know you.”

I exhale sharply. “Now do you see why I didn’t wanna share anything about my family?”

He doesn’t respond. That’s probably not even why they don’t like me, but that’s neither here nor there. I just need him to let me off the hook for lying.

“I kinda felt it from your mom and your sister,” I say. “But what did I do to your dad?”

Besides being so fine he couldn’t stop staring. Typical man, so it’s whatever, but he didn’t even try to be discreet. Then again, if I was married to that stiff cunt, I’d be looking elsewhere, too. Bitch probably has a woodchipper for a pussy.

I cross my arms, my nails digging into my skin. “This is a problem, babe.”

A huge fucking problem.

“I don’t have much family, Ace.” I glance at him, making my voice smaller. “We’re still getting to know each other. Trying to build something. If your people don’t like me…I’m scared it’ll affect how you feel about me.”

There it is.

The hook.

And he bites.

He grabs my hand in his again, where it belongs. “That ain’t gonna happen.”

“But—“

“I’m a grown ass man, Raya. I do what I want.”

He says it so forcefully, I have no choice but to believe it.

For now.

I let my body go still, closing my eyes, resting my head against the seat. Pretending to be asleep. But inside, I’m boiling.

And resolved.

I took my eye off the ball. This little vacation was nice, but it’s for the best that it’s over. I have things I have to do.

If his family won’t make room for me, I’ll make sure there’s no room left for them.