Page 6 of Caelum

FIVE

EVE

“Is something wrong?” I turned back to look at the boys, but they shut up the second I caught their eye. Instead, Eren tossed a shirt at Stefan. It had been tucked into his waistband, flapping down behind him, but I watched as Stefan, frowning at the others, grabbed a hold of the fabric then tugged it over his head.

“It doesn’t matter,” Nestor said, his smile tight. “Are you going to be okay now?”

Stefan argued, “No, we need to explain things to her.”

Eren shook his head. “We really don’t. Nicholas will handle that.”

“I don’t want him to,” Stefan growled, and his features tautened with an anger that had Nestor and Eren raising their hands in surrender.

The other boys looked surprised at Stefan’s aggression, and they looked even more surprised that I wasn’t cowering in the corner.

I wanted to snort at that. If Stefan’s growling was considered a temper, then they’d never have survived at the compound.

Some days, when my father was angry, I thought he’d burst the blood vessel that ticked on his temple. His rages were renowned among the congregation, and it was something Father Bryan made him repent and atone over repeatedly. It was also why we were stuck at the back of the church—punishment for his inability to control himself.

Self-control was, in Father Bryan’s creed, the epitome of Godliness.

The thought had my knees buckling, and I almost sank to the floor when relief hit me hard.

I no longer had to listen to that nonsense. No longer had to live my life like I was contained in a block of ice.

I was free.

Free to feel, free to live.

Until they learned the truth, of course, but until then, I’d have more of an existence than just the confined space of the compound.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Stefan rasped, grabbing me and helping me sit on the seat that was tucked under the large window. “I’m sorry I got mad, I?—”

I shook my head at him then, as he crouched down in front of me, grabbed both his hands and whispered, “They won’t make me go back, will they?”

His eyes softened. Those beautiful blue gemstones gentled as he looked at me. “Never. This is where you belong now.”

I believed him.

I belonged here.

Even if I was replacing one cell with another, I could deal with that for the freedom I’d have in the interim.

I squeezed his fingers. “I didn’t know what a plane was. Had never been in a car. Those TVs are new to me, and I’m not even sure what a phone is.” I released a shaky breath. “How am I going to live in this new world?”

I had no idea why I was telling him this. Had no idea why I was sharing my weaknesses with a boy I’d only just met, one who looked like he belonged in a really good dream rather than existing for real. There were two more in here, two other dream boys whom I didn’t know, but I had no one to trust, no one to share this with and they were here, and perhaps they’d be my friends if I just asked them to be?

Friends weren’t something I’d ever allowed myself before. But these boys were like me. They’d endured the same as I had, and Stefan looked at me in a way that made me feel safe.

I had never felt the luxury of that before, and if it made my tongue loosen up, then I wasn’t about to hold it back. Surely, I was allowed some break in my control, some small freedom?

“You take it day by day,” Stefan told me, his hands tight on mine. I could feel some calluses on his palm, and they rubbed against my skin in a delicious way. “We’ll help you. Won’t we, guys?”

I looked at the others and saw from their frowns that his words troubled them, but they nodded. I wasn’t sure why I did it. Whether it was me or the soul who was in charge, but I freed one hand from Stefan’s and held it out to them. Eren shot Nestor a look, one that spoke of their shared unease, but they stepped closer. Nestor took a seat beside me on the chair and cautiously accepted my hand.

As our fingers entwined, something settled deep inside me. Again, that feeling of safety swarmed me, and then Eren squatted down next to Stefan, breaking the thought process but making me feel better with his proximity as he rested his palm on the edge of my knee.

Surrounded by them, I released a shaky breath. “Will you tell me what we are?”

Stefan’s shoulders drooped slightly, Eren’s too as they both sat back on their butts. With their knees raised in front of them, they looked so large, so muscular that I kept on staring at parts that were definitely inappropriate to look at. If I’d been caught looking at a boy’s legs back home, I’d have been whipped.

The thought made my throat tighten up, but equally, inside, I let loose a joyous cry.

I was free.

When no one spoke, I bit my lip and shot them pleading looks. I didn’t mean to manipulate them, but waiting until tomorrow for Nicholas to share this information with me would be pure torture.

Caving first, Nestor cleared his throat and, squeezing my fingers, said, “There are seven of them. It’s difficult to say why one becomes dominant and another doesn’t.” He shrugged. “No one has ever really figured it out before, mostly because it doesn’t matter. We are what we are, and we embrace that.”

“I can handle that.” I shot him a small smile. “I’ve never allowed myself to just be, so that will be a luxury.”

His brow puckered and his fingers tightened to the point of pain around mine, but he simply stated, “Girls are different than boys. We usually know what we are when we hit eighteen. There might be some discrepancy that has us unsure, but mostly we know.”

“Why don’t girls?”

He shrugged. “Why is the sky blue?”

I gnawed on my bottom lip. “Okay. I get that. It’s unfair, but most things are, I think.”

The three of them snorted at that, and I was rather pleased that I’d amused them, even if it was only in a small way.

“The unfairness gets worse. Boys come here when they’re fourteen. Girls at thirteen. You usually need more training than we do.”

“Why? ”

“You’re hotheads. Boys tend to be more controlled. Have things under a tighter wrap.”

I frowned at that. “Is a hothead someone with a temper?”

“Yes.” Eren grimaced. “Mostly, it’s someone who can’t control themselves. Who is weak-willed in some way.”

Well, that didn’t describe me, but then I was a product of my environment. If I’d been weak-willed, I wouldn’t have survived until my seventeenth year on the compound.

Survival forged us, made us weak or strong. In my instance, I wasn’t weak. I knew that like I knew my name was Eve.

“Are women like us born hot-headed?” I asked with a frown.

“Usually,” Nestor confirmed. “The books say that girl babies are fussier than boys.”

My lips pursed at that. “Well, isn’t that kind of them?”

Nestor laughed a little. “I’m only telling you what I know.”

“Why, though?”

“How long is a piece of string?” he countered with a shrug, and I stared at him.

“I don’t know. How long is a piece of string?”

He snorted. “That’s the point. We don’t know. Some things are just ingrained in us. Why does Stefan have blond hair and I don’t?” Another shrug. “It’s in our genetics.”

Genetics. I thought about that word, thought about the definition, and remembered that it had been blotted out with a black pen in the dictionary. Some words were. I’d never understood why, had never bothered to question it, but now it made me wonder if those words went against the New Order’s rules.

I made a mental note to find a dictionary and for that word to be the first one I looked up.

Eren patted my knee. “Your soul will probably reveal itself close to graduation.”

“You know what you are?”

“Yes.”

“How?” I tilted my head to the side. “Do you choose?”

“No. It’s selected for us.”

“By whom? God?” I queried, my brow puckering with disquiet.

“No. It’s just another one of those questions that we don’t have answers to. It seems to be completely random, but I’m sure there’s a pattern that we just haven’t seen yet,” Eren told me, his voice steady, his eyes calm. As I looked at him, I felt that calm down to my marrow .

“Okay,” I replied, knowing he had no reason to lie to me. Blinking at Stefan, I asked, “So, which are you then?”

“I’m either a Lorelei or an Incubus.”

Eren stated, “They’re similar. Both are emotional souls that can tempt and entice…” He hesitated. “Humans.”

“Okay, so what do they do? How do they tempt and entice?” I thought about the words and tried to fit them to the souls I’d been living with for over six years. Which was which?

“Don’t you know by now?” Nestor rasped, making me hesitate.

“I don’t know what either means so I can’t say. I can imagine, but I don’t know the difference. There’s one day when my voice can make men do whatever I want. Then the next, they look at me like I’m a large meal and they’re starving.”

The boys shot each other wry glances, but it was Eren who spoke, “You pinpointed the Succubus and the Lorelei. An Incubus is a boy; a Succubus is a girl. She’s the one that makes the men look at you that way. That’s the soul in control today, isn’t it?”

My cheeks heated. “Yes.”

His smile was teasing. “Don’t worry. We’re used to it.”

That didn’t make me feel better.

“Oh,” I croaked. “Good, I suppose.”

They snickered together, but it wasn’t meant to be cruel.

Nestor said, “The voice one, that’s the Lorelei. The difference between the two is that the Lorelei can use their voice to make a human do whatever they want. If they’re powerful enough, they can even make creatures move at their command.”

I thought about how Merinda had sung a song and the entire compound had fallen asleep.

That was the definition of power, I felt sure.

“The Incubi and Succubi are different. They call to humans and creatures alike with their bodies.”

“Why?”

“That’s how they feed.” Nestor hesitated. “You know what sex is, right?”

I cleared my throat. “Sort of. I read the dictionary when I was bored. You mean gender, yes?” Ironically enough, that hadn’t been blacked out.

Eren winced. “No.” He cleared his throat. “Sex is gender, but it’s also something men and women do to make babies.”

I wanted to pull my hands back to cover my face as mortification hit me that I didn’t know this, something that Lori, the housemistress, had talked about as easily as breathing.

The boys did too.

Had they done it?

“In some cultures, it’s what happens on the night of your wedding,” Stefan explained, and I realized that was what my mother had told my sister. Don’t fight it. Just let it happen.

I wasn’t sure what she’d meant, and I knew Angela hadn’t either. She’d blinked in confusion, and the next day when I’d seen her, she’d walked stiffly… did that mean sex hurt?

“O-Okay. What does sex have to do with being a Succubus or an Incubus?”

The three of them shot each other looks, but it was Stefan who, with a husky voice, eventually explained, “Sex can create powerful emotions. Those emotions nourish that particular soul.”

I had many questions, but I could tell they were uncomfortable. Perhaps there were answers in the books in the library… or perhaps this was some of the information they explained in the classes here. I hoped so. I wanted to understand, needed to, but I’d settle for small doses at the moment. They’d be easier to swallow.

“Okay, so what are the others?”

I could sense their relief that I was moving on and wondered at it. Was it for my benefit? I kind of hoped it was. At least it meant they were looking after me, even if it was only in a small way.

“I’m a gouille ,” Nestor explained. “Or a Gargoyle. We’re sentinels. We protect and watch over people.”

“What makes you a Gargoyle?”

“Even though I know what I am, I won’t be able to fully turn until I’m twenty-one and have graduated.”

“Why?”

“Because only upon graduation can we cross through the gates.”

“And that matters?”

“Yes. It’s a portal. Just like how you can speak in tongues , it will enable you to be your true self in all the ways that a creature is meant to be.”

There was so much there that I didn’t understand, but I decided to move on with the conversation and make mental notes for later. “And what will happen to you when you cross through the portal?”

“There are other races like me. The Hell Hound and the Were. We can all turn into another animal.”

My eyes widened, and I pulled back, but Stefan and Nestor’s hands never relinquished their hold on mine, and I found that I liked that. “You can change form?”

“Yes. A Were could be any animal on Earth. Just as the soul decides that’s the dominant creature, it will decide upon the animal too.”

“That’s…” Words failed me, and considering I thought of words as my only weapon, that irked me to no end. “Awesome.” Even that felt too weak an adjective, to be honest.

Nestor’s lips twitched like he knew I was bewildered by what he was saying and he was trying not to smile at me. “I’m different, though. They will have an animal. Me? Not so much. I will have hardened skin. It will be close to leather, very difficult to penetrate with a blade or a bullet. Gouilles are protectors, and they’re built to stand guard for days on end. That’s why they protect buildings. You can see them all over Caelum. They’re on roofs and on the stone moldings on the facade of an edifice.”

I remembered the stone monsters that decorated the front door of the Academy. “You’ll turn to stone?”

The curve of his mouth deepened. “No. My skin will just get tougher.”

“More like impenetrable,” Eren commented.

Nestor conceded that with a nod.

“What do the Hell Hounds do?”

“Well, they work with another creature—the Sin Eater.”

My eyes widened. “Do they eat sins?”

Stefan laughed. “You got that, huh?”

“Sins as in the acts that corrupt eternal souls? Or…?”

“They eat actual souls. Corrupted ones.” Stefan shot Eren a look before he cleared his throat. “They’re basically our cops. Hell Hounds work with them as a team.”

“There are days when I feel like my skin is too tight… which soul is that one?”

They frowned at me, but Stefan asked, “Do you feel angry on those days?”

“Sometimes.”

“When that happens and you’re angry, it’s a Hell Hound day. If you feel…” Nestor pursed his lips. “I guess, when you feel like you want to corral everyone you care about, make sure you can watch over them, that’s a gouille day.”

“And a Were day?” I inquired. “That the one where you want to just run and run?”

They all nodded, and it relieved me that even if I had an eighth soul, everything else was in working order. To a degree, at any rate .

I gnawed on my bottom lip. “Why do they change each day?”

“So that they can stretch their legs, basically,” Eren explained softly. “How will they know which is the strongest if they’re always contained?”

“Good point.” Pulling my hand from his so I could reach up and rub at my temple, I murmured, “Thank you so much for explaining.”

They smiled at me, and it felt like the sun had just burst out from behind a wall of clouds. It felt good to be encompassed by them and even better to be with them. They were strangers, and yet I felt safer amongst them than I had with my own family.

Stefan squeezed my fingers. “There’s a lot to learn, and you’re older than most new students so you’ll be behind for a while, but we’ll help out.”

“You will?”

He stared into my eyes like I was a pool of water that he wanted to dive into. “I’ll do anything for you, Eve.”

“Why?”

He reached up with his free hand and rubbed his chest. “I think you know.”

Did I?

My cheeks burned again. “Are we kin?”

Nestor snorted and Eren laughed, earning themselves glares from Stefan. Before he could snap at them, though, Eren clambered to his feet and stated, “You should get some rest. The days start early here, and you’ll need some time to get acquainted with things.”

Stefan squeezed my fingers again. “You’ll meet Alexandre soon. He’s one of our friends.” He pulled a face. “He got into a fight and…let’s just say it didn’t work out so well for him.”

“Is he okay?” I questioned, concerned.

“He’s fine.” He shot me a gentle smile then leaned over until he was in my space. He scented of fresh air, a salty sweat that wasn’t overwhelming like the men at the compound after they’d been doing heavy lifting, and a sweet smell that was like a perfume. The scent made me frown because it was delicious. Fresh and zingy, even though I’d seen the gleam on his body that spoke of his having been ‘training’ before he’d come to guide me around.

I looked up into his eyes as he hovered above me, but I wasn’t nervous like before. Stefan meant me no harm. When he’d touched his chest, I’d felt the pang in my own. Whatever we were, family or two people meant to be friends, he wouldn’t harm me.

He moved to press his lips to my temple after a moment’s hesitation. The gesture had me closing my eyes at the silken feel. When he backed away, it surprised and saddened me because he smelled so good.

I turned and saw Nestor standing there with my hand still in his. It surprised me when he did the same, kissed my other side, but I didn’t pull back. It was a gentle gesture. A soft one that made me feel, of all things, protected. Stupid, perhaps, but it did.

“Good night, Eve.”

“Night, Nestor.” To Eren, who was hovering over by the door to my room now, I whispered, “Night, Eren.”

His smile was taut, and I knew he was relieved to be getting out of there.

When the three boys, well, men —I discerned the difference now after feeling their touch on me—left my room, I sank back against the window. The cool glass felt good against my body, and I wished it were cooler. I felt like I had a fever. Like I was overheating from the inside out.

Gnawing on my bottom lip, I let my gaze drift around my new room. It was nothing like my other bedroom at the cabin. I’d shared that with my brother and sister until they’d both been of age and had married, leaving the cabin for ones of their own.

Was it terrible that I didn’t miss my parents? Not even my siblings?

We hadn’t been close because I’d never been able to be close to anyone. Not since I was eleven, anyway.

It saddened me that the only thing I felt was joy at being away from those who had purported to love me, even as they’d planned to marry me off to the leader of our people.

With a shaky sigh, I got to my feet and walked toward one of two doors. When I pulled open the first, I saw clothing. The fabrics were in bright colors with a strange stretch when I plucked at them. On the floor, there were shoes like the boys had been wearing. They were wide-toed, made from a material with holes in them, with a kind of spongy sole. The clothes made me blush because there weren’t many layers to them. I just hoped they fit.

It was a relief to close that particular door, and when I opened the next one, I gaped at what I saw.

The room was the size of my bedroom back at the cabin. Where the outhouses had always been at the property line to avoid the smell, relieving oneself had always been a grim chore.

Here?

This was a marvel.

I peered at the different facilities, pushing buttons here and turning handles there. I soon realized that one was for waste, while the other was for washing. Then there was a large one for bathing that I assumed was for me to stand beneath.

The water was cold, but if I turned it to the red part of the handle, it warmed up as if by magic.

It was silly, I supposed, to be frightened of this room. As much as I was amazed, I was also taken aback.

This room epitomized my new life.

This was the day to the night of before.

I had a steep learning curve coming my way, in more ways than just one.