Page 130 of By A Thread

“Hang on there, big guy. I think these heels have a weight limit,” Ally said, propping me against the doorframe. She slipped off her stilettos and managed to wrestle me and the food into the vestibule before shutting and locking the door.

There was a ruckus on the other side of the main door to my house.

“Brownie!” I had temporarily forgotten I had a dog. This was an excellent reminder. I yanked the door open, and a brown blur of fur hurled himself at me. “Hi, buddy! Hi! Did you miss me?”

I miscalculated the wind speed of an excited chocolate lab and ended up on my ass as Brownie devoured my face.

“Ouch! What did we say about stepping on my balls?”

Ally made a choking noise, and I looked up. “Are you okay?” I asked, closing one eye to bring her into focus.

She cleared her throat and looked everywhere but me and Brownie. “Stay strong, Ally,” she was chanting.

Brownie, sensing a human being who wasn’t currently giving him all of her love, danced over to her and plopped his ass on the floor.

“Who’s the most handsome boy?” Ally crooned, ruffling his ears.

“I am,” I insisted. “But Brownie’s okay too.”

My dog shot me a “hehe” look and went back to seducing my girl with his big, dumb brown eyes.

“Get your own girl, dog.”

“Don’t you listen to your daddy,” she said, smushing Brownie’s ecstatic face between her hands.

I had the sudden, intense urge to tell all the women in my life how much I appreciated them putting up with me.

“What are you doing, Dom?” Ally asked when I wrestled my phone out of my pants pocket.

“First, I’m going to email Shayla—the one who hates me—to tell her she does a really great job. Then I’m going to record a song for my mom and send it to her.” My phone’s screen seemed unusually small and out of focus.

“Okay. Let’s put that on hold before you damage a retina,” Ally said, taking my phone from me. “Here’s a free Ted Talk. Drunk texting never does what you want it to.”

“But I need to say good job!”

“You need to get to bed,” she countered.

Bed sounded really good. Especially with Ally. But I was still the aforementioned super drunk and wasn’t too confident in my performance abilities.

“I might need a few minutes and some tea and maybe a shower before I can… you know…”

Both Allys were staring at me like I’d started speaking Swahili.

“We’re not having sex, Dominic. I’m putting you to bed so you can sleep this off.”

“Will you sleep it off with me?” I tried to wink and show her my underused flirtatious side.

“Are your eyes bothering you?” she asked.

I tried the wink again. “No.”

“You’re blinking weird.”

“I’m not blinking. I’m winking.”

Brownie drew our attention with a whimpery noise. “Hafta to go out, boy?” I climbed to my feet and grandly opened the door for dog and woman.

“I can take him for a walk,” Ally volunteered.