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I nnvy

Brunch with Neo wasn’t going as expected. She admitted to telling Bully where we lived, and I didn’t fault her for that. I was sure he and Merc hadn’t taken it easy on my girl. Learning that he’d taken a week to get his professional affairs in order so he could devote all of his attention to me and Innah was kind of sweet. I wasn’t expecting to break down in tears last night but what I’d said to him was true. Unfortunately, I didn’t trust him anymore. I knew he was a man of his word, but there was a part of me that was waiting for the day he’d disappear again.

Maybe it was my ego or an unhealthy, dependent version of love, but I couldn’t understand how he’d been able to go nine months without talking to me. I’d just said that to Neo, and she carefully considered my words before responding.

“Well… men aren’t wired like us. We use time to detach and communication to gain clarity. Men use solitude to find clarity. The less they have us, the more they want us. I would imagine not a day went by that didn’t make Bully want you more. While you, on the other hand, spent that time trying to want him less.”

There was no denying that, so I didn’t even bother to. Instead, I took a sip of my mimosa.

“If it makes you feel better, Merc said he spent their guys’ night last night pouting and looking at pictures of you and Innah.”

That did make me blush. “He did?”

“Yep. They stayed out for like an hour before they all went home to their women. Bully was pissed because he didn’t want to hang with the wild ass single men after they left.”

I could only imagine. Karrington and Eyela had a new baby boy and Aspen and Malaysia had a little girl. Beethoven wanted to have a second baby with Whiskee but now that he was working in Memphis with Karrington, they decided to hold off on expanding their family. Asylum and Dauterive were content with True and Shiloh for now, and Neo was ready to get the rest of her babies with Merc out of the way. That had been my plan too—to have my babies with Bully back to back so they could grow up together and so I could enjoy traveling and living my life without having to take so many breaks because I was pregnant.

Now, I wasn’t sure what the future held for us. I heard Bully when he said he wanted me and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want him too, but I didn’t want to feel like I made it too easy for him to come back. I didn’t want him to think he could do something like this again and I’d take him back. If there was no fear of losing me, what reason would he have to treat me right?

“I wonder why he didn’t call me. Well, I guess because I never texted him back.”

“Any why didn’t you?”

I shrugged and fought my smile. “Just… not trying to fall back into that habit with him.”

Neo sucked her teeth as she sat back in her seat. “Girl, bye. You know you want that man. Ain’t no point in you playing hard to get.”

“I’m not trying to play hard to get,” I said through my light laughter. “I just don’t want him to think what he did was okay. I don’t want him to think he can treat me any kind of way and there will be no consequence. That I will just accept it.”

“Have you told him that?”

“No. Last night was the first time we really talked about anything other than Innah. Usually when he pops up she’s all we talk about.”

“So maybe you should tell him that. There’s no point in punishing yourself if you want to be with him just to prove a point.”

“Who said I want to be with him? What makes you think not talking to him is me punishing myself?” The skeptical look she gave me made us both burst into a fit of laughter. “Okay, okay, so maybe I do want to be with him. But I can’t make it easy, Neo. I just can’t.”

“Then don’t but be mature and communicate. Make him work for you but actually let him work for you. He can’t apply pressure if you keep him at arm’s length.”

“Trust me, he’ll find a way,” was what I said, but that didn’t stop me from pulling my phone out and finally responding to his text. All I did was heart it and not even a full two minutes passed before he called.

“Hello?” I answered, biting back my smile.

“Where you at?”

“Having brunch with Neo.”

“Where? I’ma pull up.”

“Uh… no. This is girl time.”

He chuckled. “Neo talk to you every day and see you almost every weekend. Let me reclaim my time.”

“How about you just stay over after you pick Innah up?”

“Ugh,” he groaned, making me laugh. “Fine. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Okay, Bully.”

I disconnected the call because I didn’t want him to hear the smile in my voice. Because the truth was, I wanted to see him just as much as he wanted to see me. Maybe even more.

Neo and I continued our brunch, taking some time to plan her upcoming trip with Merc. They would be kid free, and I was sure they’d start working on baby number three. By the time we were done, we both were tipsy and feeling the mimosa tower we’d gotten to share. I was glad we didn’t drive, because though I wasn’t drunk, I was sleepy as hell and didn’t trust myself behind the wheel.

Our arms were linked as we walked to the town car Merc reserved for us. As soon as we were buckled up, we cuddled against each other. I wanted to call and check on Innah but decided to do so when I got home so I could take a nap. If I was going to see Bully tonight, I needed to sober up.

* * *

The sound of Innah’s laughter was like a balm for my soul. She and Bully had been home for about an hour and she was having the time of her life playing with him. Innah was a friendly baby, but she didn’t take to people quickly. She was shy until she felt comfortable, then she got attached. From the first time she saw her daddy, she’d been attached to him. I could leave them alone for any length of time and she never cried like she did with other people.

A part of me felt she remembered his voice from how much he talked to her while she was in my belly. And maybe it was his love that made her feel like she was safe with him. Either way, I was glad they were getting along so well. I let them play for about an hour longer before it was time to start her nighttime routine. Bully wanted to handle it, so I let him. I told him what he needed to do but kept my distance unless he asked a question or needed me. Seeing him be so present brought tears to my eyes.

Since he popped up at the spa, this man hadn’t taken a single day away from us. Every morning he showed up that first week, and now, he was here every night as well. It was getting harder and harder for me to not touch him, kiss him, treat him like the man I’d prepared to spend the rest of my life with.

After Innah went to sleep, we went to the living room and watched sports recaps silently. I felt shy with him and that had never been the case. From the first day me and Neo met him and Merc at that bar on Valentine’s Day, me and Bully talked and got along like best friends. I didn’t know how long it would take for us to get back to that, but I was sure we would.

“Did you start your skincare line?” he checked, and knowing that he remembered made me smile.

“Not yet. I had to increase my staff because I went viral on social media, so balancing my schedule and getting everyone into a groove has been my focus. It’s going to launch this summer.”

“That’s great, Angel. I’m really proud of you, and I was hoping I hadn’t missed it.”

“Thank you,” I muttered before twisting my mouth to the side and looking away.

Bully covered my hand with his on my thigh. “Hey…” Slowly, I looked over at him. “We’re still us. Nothing has changed that.”

“Can I be honest?”

“Always,” he agreed, sitting closer to me. I flipped my hand and linked my fingers with his.

“I want to be with you. I’m just scared to let you in easily. I don’t want to act like you leaving and not telling me why was okay. I’ve never felt so abandoned, and for you to have been the one to do it…” I paused and pulled in a shaky breath. “Gabby’s truth wasn’t yours to tell, and I honor what you did for her, but that secret coupled with you leaving… Bae, I’ve spent the last nine months unsure of where you were, if you were okay, if you wanted me anymore. I didn’t know if you’d ever be here for Innah. That was a lot. So I wish I could just act normal around you but it’s hard.”

“I am sorry for not being there for you when you had Innah, and I hate I missed the first six months of my princess’s life. There’s nothing I can say to change that. All I can do is show you going forward that I will never leave the two of you again. If you can tell me what to do… how to fix us… I’ll do it. Other than that, I’m willing to put in the work myself. I just need a way in.”

My head shook as I pulled my hand from his. “So you want me to just turn my hurt and anger off and act like I don’t feel how I do?”

“Not at all,” he rejected, pulling my hand back into his. “I’m saying I want to love you and regain your trust so those feelings will go away. If you tell me we have a chance, I will build the bridge to get to you, baby. All I need is confirmation that we will be together in the end.” Bully lifted my hand and kissed it. “Just say yes, and I’ll earn you, Innvy. All over again.”

My heart raced. Pounded in my chest. Licking the corner of my mouth, I released a shaky breath. As hard as I wanted to be, as difficult as I wanted to make this, I couldn’t. I couldn’t deny how much I missed my man. How much I loved watching him and our baby girl build a bond. We had a second chance to get our happily ever after, and I didn’t want to stand in the way of that.

“Promise me you will communicate with me and never abandon us again. If you ever have to go on one of these mafia missions again—”

“I promise I will never keep a secret that effects our home and relationship again. I promise to always communicate and let you in. No one will ever come before you and Princess. And I will never, ever abandon y’all again.”

His declaration eased my nerves instantly. My heart rate steadied, and the slight tremble running up my spine ceased.

“Okay. Yes.”

“Yes?” he repeated with a smile as he sat up in his seat.

“Yes.”

“Innvy,” he muttered, pulling me in for a hug. I melted against him, allowing myself to relish his closeness. Squeezing my eyes shut, I inhaled a deep breath. Finally, it felt like I could rest. Like I could breathe again.