Page 11 of Bullied Alpha Bride (Wolfshade Brides-for-Hire #2)

The feel of Kit’s lips against mine sends a warm rush through my body, so powerful that I have to press my thighs together as goosebumps rise on my skin. My hands have a life of their own as my fingers dance up his arms to settle on his shoulders, giving me leverage to kiss him even harder.

Oh, my love! I’ve wanted this for so long. Did you miss me as much as I missed you?

The horrible thoughts and suspicions bubble up inside me, but I run from it. I run from the pain into the sweet release of Kit’s kiss.

I kissed him.

I grip his shoulders a little tighter, trying to deny the fact. It would be a lot easier if he seduced me, then I could lay all the blame on him. Just like last time.

I can’t deny it. This time, it’s all my fault.

And I can’t stop.

The run up the mountain freed me, separated my body from my mind, and released me from the torture of my thoughts.

I hadn’t shifted much while I was my father’s prisoner—he forbade it—and the last time I shifted was to take to the woods, relying on my wolf to take me far from Grace’s Falls and hopefully into safety.

I did… my wolf whispers.

Is this safe? Really?

Yes…

I struggle against the truth of my wolf, not daring to let go of Kit. His touch is addictive, and the hot press of his mouth has cleared my mind and turned me into a creature of pure sensation.

It’s been so long since I felt this good! It’s been so long since I let my wolf run for joy alone.

I can’t deny the pleasure racing through me, like golden sunlight rushing through my blood. It hums through my muscles and into my skin, a vibration that makes my body sing.

More.

I lean in harder, feeling the heat intensifying between my legs, begging to be satisfied. I’m about to climb into his lap when the full force of what I’m doing hits me like a truck.

This is how I felt when…

When he took me.

I let go of Kit, shoving him away from me now instead of pulling him closer. I scrabble back a little, putting distance between our bodies. For a moment, I just stare at the ground, panting to get my breath back.

My body throbs, a horrible, fierce ache that mingles with the betrayed cry of my wolf. Both demand satisfaction, but I refuse with every fiber of my being, willing my desire to die and my wolf to be at peace.

Kit doesn’t say anything; he just sits on the outcrop, watching me. Again, I get the feeling that there are secrets lurking in his beautiful, bright blue eyes, hidden truths that flash beneath the surface, gone before I can be sure I even saw them.

Maybe I’m just suspicious of everyone. Kit may have nothing to hide, and I just see betrayal and abuse everywhere I look.

I take a deep breath and let it out as a sigh, feeling my body finally release. My muscles tremble a little as the tension drains out of me, the effect of dropping from such a high point of adrenaline to nothing, leaving me shaken and fragile.

“Do you want to go back?” Kit asks.

I nod, not looking up at his face.

He shifts and takes a few steps towards the trees. I call up my wolf, and it’s not as easy as I’d like it to be. The second she takes over, desire lights up again, running through my body with the unbridled passion born of a wild thing.

Kit flicks his tail and runs into the forest, and I follow in hot pursuit.

I can’t hold back the wolf’s needs, so I surrender my mind to her again as we run down the mountain.

I find myself coming even with Kit and playfully nudging at his shoulder, barking and wagging my tail wildly as we chase each other.

I’m so, so tired of fighting… of being in pain. I have to stop. I have to…

The last of my resolve disappears, and my human mind vanishes. There is nothing but love and joy, a connection to the land and to Kit that transcends the complications of human reasoning.

I never thought I could be so happy.

The run down the mountain doesn’t take very long, and we get back to the graveyard sooner than I’d like.

Can’t we just stay out there, wild and free, forever? I don’t want to come back here, to a world of pain, doubt, and loss…

As my human shape takes over, my wolf gives me control, and the second my thoughts return to me, I’m full of conflict again.

I get dressed, keeping one eye on Kit the whole time. He doesn’t try to sneak glances at me, which I appreciate.

If he really was using me, surely he’d use his gaze like a weapon, just like Vince would. It’s one thing to have a guy look at you, and quite another for him to look at you with intent to harm.

Vince could make me feel like I’d been violated by just looking me up and down. It didn’t matter if I was naked or not—his eyes carried the weight of his intent, and I know there are plenty of men in the world who can make a woman feel that dirty, just with a glance.

And Kit’s not one of them.

“Are you ready?” he asks, startling me just a little.

Nodding, I follow him down the path to the gates, where I see his truck parked in front of the cemetery.

Kit opens the door for me, and I climb into the passenger seat, feeling the silence growing thicker around us. If Kit was respecting my need for quiet, that would be a good thing, but I’m sensing tension in him that means he’s holding back as well.

But how do I even start a conversation like that? “Hey, it totally sucked how you dumped me right after I gave my heart and soul to you. Then I got kidnapped and abused by my dad for years.

“Oh, by the way, did you kill my mom?”

As Kit starts up the truck, I let out a long sigh. He looks over at me with concern.

“Are you alright?” he asks. “We could go to town and grab some food if you like?”

“No, thanks,” I answer. “I just need a shower and bed for now. It’s been a long day.”

“It sure has,” he agrees. “Would you like to talk about it?”

Yes.

“No,” I reply. “At least, not now. I know there’s a lot of ground to cover between us, Kit. But we’re just going to have to take it slow.”

I notice that his fingers are gripping the steering wheel, and his jaw looks tight, as if he’s holding back a whole ton of words. I’m curious, but I’m also afraid of what he might say.

Not now, for the love of God. I can’t deal with any more fear tonight.

When we get back to Kit’s townhouse, I follow him up the path. As soon as we get inside, I tell him I’m going for a shower and hurry up the stairs. Slamming the door behind me, I lock it and brace myself against it with my arms wrapped around myself.

What the fuck am I doing?

To my frustration, tears leak down my cheeks again, and I wipe my nose angrily. Hurrying to get my clothes off, I turn on the shower and get in to wash the tears from my cheeks with the rush of hot water.

I kissed him.

Even with all the ugly shit circling around in my brain, this thought has the most impact. I start to tremble, and it gets worse when my body throbs. My nipples harden as I wonder where that kiss might have led us.

I lean against the wall, letting the rush of water flow over my chest as I run my hand across my breasts. I don’t want to let Kit in again, but I’ve suffered for so long, I forgot what it was like to feel good.

And Kit makes me feel very good.

Sniffing to get my tears under control, I wash myself over quickly, not daring to linger in case I awaken my lust again. I rub myself dry with a towel and put on a robe that’s hanging on the back of the door. It’s way too big for me, so it has to be Kit’s.

Just a hint of his scent rises from the fabric. I close my eyes, savoring it.

How am I supposed to go to sleep, completely wrapped in his scent, with his body right next to mine, close enough to touch?

When I get to the bedroom, Kit has his back turned to the door, the blanket wrapped around his body. His breathing is slow and even, so I assume he’s asleep.

I’m touched to see the cookies and cocoa on the nightstand, just like the night before. It’s such a small gesture, but it really makes me feel cared for. I eat the cookies slowly, washing them down with the rich cocoa.

Even though I was worried about being able to sleep, the second I curl up under the covers, a wave of exhaustion flows through me, loosening my muscles and clouding my thoughts.

Stress and conflict fade, leaving only the imprint of Kit’s mouth on mine.

Fantasies of what comes next drift through my mind.

I’m surprised when I wake to a bright, sun-filled room. Even with the curtains drawn, I can tell it’s at least mid-morning. I can’t remember the last time I slept this late, or this well.

Father would never let me sleep in, and I was lucky if I got four hours a night.

Even better, I don’t remember having a single nightmare. I haven’t had a night free of bad dreams since the day I saw my mother’s body and Father dragged me to Grace’s Fall.

I can hear Kit downstairs. I get up to join him, wrapping the robe around me a bit more tightly.

I can’t put on yesterday’s clothes—they’re filthy. I’ll have to take up Kit’s offer about breaking his credit card.

Kit’s money and status never meant anything to me. For the first time in my life, I realize what it means to have a rich husband, and how different my life is really going to be.

I used pots and pans without handles because we couldn’t afford to buy new ones! Forget things like appliances or new mattresses and pillows—you just get used to the bed bugs.

I’m still thinking about going down in my robe—and wondering if I have the self-control to not flash Kit at least once—when I notice the bags by the door. A quick inspection shows me they’re full of clothes.

Kit probably had them delivered. Express post. By helicopter.

I giggle to myself and find a pair of jeans and a dark red sweater, looking in the mirror and liking what I see. Even though I still have so much uncertainty inside me, I feel better today than I have in years. And I look it, too.

I bounce down the stairs, and Kit waves to me as I come through the door. He gestures to the table, and I see he’s put out a few bowls of berries and yogurt as well as muesli and toast.

“Thank you,” I say, reaching for the coffee. “And good morning.”

“Good morning to you, too,” he says, turning away from the stove to put a stack of pancakes on the table. “I see you found the clothes.”

“I did, thank you. How did you organize that?”

He shrugs as he sits down. “It wasn’t hard. When I borrowed some old clothes from Betty yesterday, she said she’d be happy to go out and get a few things. She dropped them off this morning.”

“She sounds nice,” I answer, filling my bowl with berries.

“She is. You should meet her.”

Even though Kit has just said an extremely normal, everyday thing, my blood freezes in my veins.

I’m going to have to meet a lot of people. I’m the alpha’s mate!

In high school, I was quite happily off the radar. I had my friends and didn’t look for popularity. I preferred it if most people didn’t notice me.

Then, for years with Father, I was kept in his cabin like a prisoner, only let out a few times a week to work at the factory. There were other workers there, but we weren’t allowed to socialize. All of us were slaves.

I’m about to be the center of the spotlight, with the whole pack focused on me… and I have to help rule them.

I feel like there should be a part of me that’s looking forward to having power over people who wronged me. But instead of feeling triumphant, I just feel scared.

“You okay?” Kit asks. “You’ve gone a bit pale.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I say, taking a sip of coffee and starting on my yogurt. “Just thinking.”

The look in his eye changes, just slightly, but it’s gone before I can say anything. The ugly questions rise in my mind, but I push them away.

I’m having so much fun right now, just eating breakfast that I didn’t have to make, relaxing in a nice, clean place where I’m safe…

Well… relatively safe.

“Ah, Lexa?” Kit says.

“What?” I ask abruptly. My heart trembles a little as I wonder if this is it, the moment when all this goes to hell.

“There’s a meeting today, and you need to go with me.”

My guts twist, then sink. I put my bowl down on the table, taking a sip of coffee to settle the sudden bubble of nerves.

“What?” I blurt. “Why?”

“I told you yesterday—you’re expected to be part of things from now on. That’s the main reason the council wanted me to get a mate, so we could lead the pack as a team.”

Wrapping my hands around my cup, I let out a sigh, trying not to show how freaked out I am.

Standing up in front of a bunch of people who never liked me, who probably want to get rid of me, and may have been involved in my mother’s death?

Sounds like a fucking picnic.

“After we finish breakfast, we’ll go, okay?”

“Okay,” I agree reluctantly.

As I finish my coffee, I wonder exactly what I’ve gotten myself into. And how much Iris Porter really knows.