Page 5 of Brutal Reign (Shadowed Heirs #5)

5

I think part of me always knew I’d wind up here.

Forgoing the squad wasn’t an easy decision, but after training camp was postponed and I spent the bulk of the summer honing my skills with a tattoo gun instead, it felt right. Every decent artist has an apprenticeship under their belt. My dad’s the best in the six-pack territory, and learning under his tutelage is an opportunity not many get. His bookings are always full at The Muse. The sentimental bastard named his shop after my mom– she’s his muse, and I’m their first born. I’ve yet to claim a muse of my own.

Art has always called to me, so I was looking forward to the apprenticeship. Still, I knew I’d abandon those plans if Seb needed me. I already had a bag packed just in case. What I didn’t expect was that I’d find myself waiting by the phone, hoping for his call. It only took one day to realize I’ve come to rely on Seb just as much as he relies on me. It was too quiet without him, and when it’s quiet, my thoughts wander to dark places.

It feels good to be needed. It gives me a purpose; a reason to get out of bed every day. Sometimes I wonder if my brain’s just wired differently than most other people’s. My own happiness seems to be dependent on that of those around me. I borrow their light when I can’t find my own.

Micah was all too eager to give up his spot when I told him I was coming to training camp. Seb’s a miserable asshole most days, but when he’s rattled, he’s ten times worse. River’s presence has him rattled. I could tell from the moment I laid eyes on him this morning that I was in for some serious damage control, so here I am, reporting for duty.

Whenever Seb gets like this, it’s my job to steer him back on track. Always has been. He does the same for me when I’m slipping too close to the edge, and the way we’ve come to depend on one another goes far beyond our future pack rank. We balance each other out; keep each other sane. Our demons dance to the same macabre tune.

“So that’s her crew?” I murmur quietly to Seb as I track River’s movements across the dining hall. I’ve been painfully aware of every step she’s taken since I got here. I’m an observer, and she’s far too compelling of a subject. One I’ve avoided up till now for that very reason.

“Yeah,” he grunts in response, lifting his gaze to follow my own. River and a purple-haired girl are taking seats at a table, joining up with a few other recruits. “The girl’s from her pack. Think they just met those other guys yesterday.”

“And Jake?” I ask, watching him approach with his plate and slide onto the bench next to River.

Seb makes a scoffing sound in his throat, pointedly averting his gaze. “He’s been pandering to her since they got here.”

“Never liked that guy,” I mutter. Something’s off about the way Jake has been trailing after River all day like a lost puppy, begging for scraps of her attention. Doubt she’s even noticed.

“Me neither,” Seb agrees, pushing the spaghetti noodles around his plate with his fork. Dinner tonight is chicken parmesan- one of Seb’s favorites- but he’s barely touched it. He needs to get out of his own head.

“Look who we found,” Eli comments conspiratorially, and I crane my neck over a shoulder to see him and Beau approaching with their dinner plates piled high, Ares Raines grinning between them.

“This seat taken?” Ares asks, not waiting for Seb to respond before dropping his plate onto the table beside his and kicking a leg over the bench.

Ares is only a couple years older than us, so we’ve been running in the same circles for a long time. All three of the Raines siblings hung around the packhouse a lot while we were growing up since their mom is tight with Seb’s dad. We haven’t seen much of Ares since he joined squad leadership, but whenever we do, it’s like no time has passed. He’s always a welcome addition to our group.

Seb’s lips spread into a grin of his own as Ares sinks down beside him. “You sure you wanna slum it with the recruits?” he taunts, leaning over to knock his shoulder into Ares’.

“Not sure if you’ve noticed, but the squad leader table is getting pretty light these days,” Ares mumbles as he tips his head toward the conspicuously vacant table across the dining hall.

“Yeah, what’s with that?” Beau asks, him and Eli rounding the table to take seats across from us on the opposite side.

Ares heaves a sigh, carding his fingers through his flame-red hair. “Everyone’s getting mated up, bro. Or taking over Alpha rank for their packs. They’ve all moved out of the complex except me and Andie, but she and Nash are always off doing their own thing. Glad you guys are finally here so I don’t have to fly solo.” He picks up his fork, stabbing it into the mound of spaghetti on his plate and winding the noodles around the tines. “At least there’s a bunch of hot new girls in your recruit class so I won’t die of boredom.”

“Who’ve you got your eye on?” Beau asks as he tucks into his own dinner. He and Ares have always been engaged in some unspoken competition for who can get the most hookups under their belt.

Ares shoves a forkful of spaghetti in his mouth, considering as he chews, then swallowing before responding. “Well River Jacobsen, obviously, but I don’t have a death wish. Her friend’s cute, though. I dig the purple hair.” He shrugs a shoulder nonchalantly, going in for another forkful of spaghetti while Seb slides me a glance.

It’s not surprising that Ares has the hots for River. He’s not exactly known for being picky when it comes to his conquests, and Riv is sexy as fuck. Guess it’s a good thing that her dad’s a psycho who issues death threats to anyone who ever looks at her sideways.

“That’s Hayden Price,” Eli provides between bites of chicken. “Beau’s tryin’ to hit.”

Ares’ eyes spark in challenge. “Hope you like my sloppy seconds then,” he drawls, smirking at Beau.

Beau rolls his eyes as he winds spaghetti around his fork. “Good luck, bro. She’s attached at River’s fucking hip.”

“Then maybe we’ll just have to make it a threesome,” Ares suggests with a wink.

Seb’s knuckles whiten around the handle of his fork, and I bump my knee into his beneath the table. I’m thinking the same thing he is-–that just because we can’t have her, it doesn’t mean we want anyone else to– but we can’t react. We don’t have the same control over Ares as we do the others. He’d see any threat we issued as a challenge, and that’s the last fucking thing we need to deal with right now.

“Heard you had to pull laps this morning,” Ares comments, nudging Seb with an elbow.

He lifts his head, opening his mouth to respond, but Chandler beats him to it.

“That wasn’t Sebastian’s fault,” she quips as she steps up to our table and helps herself to the seat beside Eli.

I feel Seb stiffen beside me. He hates being called by his full name; even his parents only use it when he’s in trouble.

“River was being a bitch, I saw the whole thing go down,” Chandler continues, arranging her plate in front of her before lifting her gaze to Seb. “You shouldn’t let her get away with embarrassing you like that. You’re an Alpha.”

“So’s she, apparently,” Eli murmurs around a mouthful of chicken.

“C’mon, we all know that’s not gonna happen,” Chandler scoffs. She picks up her fork, spearing a piece of lettuce off her plate. “No pack is gonna accept a female Alpha.”

“Did we say you could sit here?” Seb growls, cutting her a glare.

She blanches, pausing with her fork halfway to her mouth before swiftly regaining her composure and lowering the utensil back to her plate. “Lines are being drawn amongst the recruits after that little tussle today,” she deadpans. “Do you want me on your side or not?”

“If it gets her to leave training camp, then sure,” he grumbles, pushing up to his feet and stabbing his fingers through his hair. “Ace, you ready?”

I ease off the bench in response, swiping my plate up from the table. “See you guys in the lounge,” I tell Beau and Eli, completely ignoring Chandler’s presence as I turn to Ares. “Wanna come hang out for a while?”

“Nah, it’s bar night for the squad leaders every Thursday, so I’m heading over after this,” he replies, shoveling another forkful of pasta into his mouth. “You guys should come.”

I glance Seb’s way, who gives a little shake of his head.

“Don’t think Seb’s in the mood to play nice with Madd,” I chuckle, turning back to Ares. “Maybe next time.”

Ares offers each of us parting fist-bump before we turn to head across the dining hall, dumping our plates in the wash bin on our way to the exit.

“You do realize you just called open season on River, right?” I murmur as the two of us start for the barracks.

Seb swings his gaze on me, brows knitting together. “No I didn’t.”

I heave a sigh, scrubbing a hand down my face. Seb’s my best friend in the world, but his mouth has a tendency to move faster than his brain. He doesn’t even realize the dumb shit he says half the time.

“You said you want her gone from training camp, how do you think that Chandler girl is gonna interpret that?”

Seb rolls his eyes, pushing into the barracks and heading for the staircase at the rear. “She’s dumb, but she’s not stupid. She wouldn’t try to go up against an Alpha.”

“She already said she doesn’t think of Riv as an Alpha,” I point out.

Seb pauses at the base of the stairs, pivoting to face me. His gaze shutters as he chews on the inside of his cheek. “Well if she runs her off, she’ll be doing us a favor,” he grumbles. “Don’t even try to tell me that you’re not all fucked up being around her. I can see it in your eyes every time you look at her.”

He’s not wrong.

“Chandler’s harmless, let her do her worst,” he continues, turning away and starting up the stairs. “It won’t be half as bad as what I’ll do if she sticks around.”

“You really think her leaving is the answer?” I mumble, ascending the stairs after him.

He flicks me a glance over his shoulder. “Wasn’t it before?”

No.

I won’t tell him that, because the stubborn asshole still thinks we did the right thing by cutting her out of our lives three years ago. His reaction now only proves that solution was the equivalent of putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. This time, I’m not sure how we’re going to stop the bleed.

I grunt in response, following Seb into the lounge where a couple of other recruits are already hanging out. One look from him has them scrambling away from the sofas in front of the TV, and he flops down onto the one in the middle, reaching forward to snatch the gaming controllers off the glass-top coffee table and tossing one toward me.

I sink down onto the opposite side of the couch, kicking my legs out in front of me and getting comfortable as Seb queues up a familiar racing game on the Playstation. We don’t game as much as we used to anymore, but we’ve played this particular one so many times that it’s easy to fall back into. As soon as we choose our cars and the first race starts, muscle memory kicks in, my fingers working the buttons of the controller effortlessly.

Beau and Eli find their way up to the lounge when we’re a few races in, but Seb and I are too in the zone to pay them much attention. Then River and her friends wander in. The moment they do, our focus goes out the window, both of us instantly distracted by her presence alone.

It shouldn’t affect me as much as it does. I’ve seen Riv plenty of times since our friendship ended, and ignoring her got a little easier each time. At one point I even convinced myself I was over my stupid crush. It’s been a while, though, and somehow, she’s even more beautiful now than I remember.

I burned every sketch of her, but I never quite forgot.

“You play?” I hear one of the guys with River ask her, and I swear I can hear the smile on her face as she replies, “sometimes”.

That’s an understatement. Back in the day, the three of us spent countless rainy afternoons perched on Seb’s bed playing this exact game. She wasn’t half bad at the time, but I doubt she’s played much since.

“I’ll show you a thing or two if those guys ever stop hogging the console,” River adds loudly, and I dart Seb a sideways glance just in time to see the vein in the side of his neck protruding, his jaw tightening.

“If you wanna play, you’ve gotta beat the winner,” he snaps, still staring at the TV screen as he mashes the buttons of his controller. “Think you can do that?”

“I know I can,” River scoffs, the soft pad of her footsteps advancing closer behind us.

Seb uses my obvious distraction to seize the lead in our race, narrowly passing me on the last curve of the track before crossing the finish line.

He doesn’t even spare a second to gloat about his victory, instead turning his stony glare on me. “Give her your controller and let’s see what she’s got,” he directs, and a ripple of understanding passes between us.

She won’t do it. She’s never been able to beat Seb in a race, especially if he picks the track he always does.

I turn to glance over the back of the couch, finding River standing there with her arms folded and her brow cocked. My lips slide into a smirk. “Dare you,” I tease, dangling the controller in the air between us.

She lunges forward to snatch it out of my hand, hopping over the back of the couch to plop down in the space between me and Seb. We simultaneously stiffen on either side of her as she settles in. The moment her thigh brushes mine, I edge away, pressing in closer against the arm of the sofa.

As expected, Seb queues up the track that’s always been River’s kryptonite, grinning to himself as the countdown begins. He’s expecting a reaction out of her, but he doesn’t get it. She doesn’t back out, either. River just clutches the controller in her hands, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees and focusing on the screen.

For a second, I wonder if we miscalculated. Then the countdown ends, and they both mash the buttons of their respective controllers, peeling away from the starting line and taking off down the track.

We used to poke fun at River for sliding off the track on the first curve every time, but it quickly becomes apparent that she’s gotten better at this game. She glides around it seamlessly, staying right on Seb’s bumper as they navigate the digital Tokyo cityscape.

Fuck. She’s good.

Not even I can keep up with Seb on this track, but she’s giving him a run for his money. As the race goes on, he gets more and more irritated, making a series of dumb mistakes that allow her to slide into the lead. By the final lap, he’s practically got steam pouring from his ears.

River squeals in victory when she crosses the finish line, and Seb immediately shoots to his feet, tossing his controller down onto the coffee table with a loud clatter. “We were done anyways,” he grumbles, pushing a hand through his hair. “Once a nerd, always a nerd, right Ace?”

“Right,” I agree, snorting a laugh as I rise to stand.

The look in her eyes makes me feel like a complete tool, but Seb’s right. It’s better for her to hate us.

If she doesn’t, we’ll only wind up hating each other.