Page 45 of Breaking Rules

“She already knows at least part of it,” I ventured. “She knows you helped her, but that I said the answers weren’t correct. If I was to guess, she’s more upset because she can’t figure out what happened than she is about the marks themselves. There are far too many possibilities about why so many things were wrong, and she doesn’t know how to ask, or who to ask.”

“Shite.”

“You need to come clean with her, and I’ll take some time tomorrow to have her go over some problems with me to make sure she understands what she’s doing.”

He nodded and closed his eyes for a moment. “I fucked up.”

I decided that silence was better than agreeing with him because he might not have been thinking of all the same things I was. Just because he realized he’d been an ass about Evanne’s homework didn’t mean he thought us taking a break had been a bad idea.

He opened his eyes again and stood, the space between us instantly charging. “There are no words to describe how much I regret speaking to you the way I did a few minutes ago. I am truly sorry for everything I said.”

“Thank you.” The words sounded stiff, but it wasn’t because I didn’t want to accept his apology. He wasn’t the only one who didn’t know how to put his feelings into words.

He came a step closer, his tone softening. “And I regret ending things between us. A week with Keli around was more than enough to show me that I’d made a terrible mistake.”

I swallowed hard and told the hope inside me to stay inside that little box. Just because he regretted it didn’t change a damn thing.

Yet.

“I told you that my mother died when I was young, and Theresa is my stepmother, but I didn’t tell you how difficult it was for me to accept her. I love her, and we’re family now, but a part of me will always wonder how different things could have been if my mother hadn’t died.”

I thought I knew where he was going with this, but I didn’t interrupt. Assumptions had done enough damage already.

“When Keli came back from Italy after the shooting, she told me that she wanted the three of us to be a family. I didn’t agree because I wanted her back. I agreed to try because I thought that would be best for Evanne. That the best interest of my daughter would be served by having her parents together again.”

Any child psychologist could have told him that staying together for the kids – or getting back together, in this case – would not end well for anyone involved. For Evanne’s sake more than anyone else’s, I hoped Alec was about to tell me that he and Keli had figured that out already.

“I should have told Keli that we were still as incompatible as we had been eight years ago.” He shook his head. “The image I’ve had in my head of what a perfect family should be is a child’s fantasy that I thought I had outgrown years ago.”

He reached out and brushed back some hair that had fallen into my eyes. It was all I could do not to lean into his touch. Despite it all, I wanted him. Physically, I could have justified it. The man was smoking hot, and the sex was amazing. But it wasn’t only the physical I wanted.

“I’ve missed you,mo nighean bhan.”

My heart gave a leap at his words, at the endearment, but I couldn’t just fall into his arms. Not when there was something I still needed him to explain.

I’d intended to let it go, but now he was here, in my apartment, telling me that breaking up with me had been a mistake and that he missed me. I wanted so badly to believe him, and I could forgive accusations driven by a combination of an overprotective father’s love and the secret he considered shameful, but I couldn’t move past one particular thing without an explanation.

“Why did you tell the school that I worked in a massage parlor?”

His eyebrows shot up, the surprise on his face genuine as far as I could tell. “What?”

“I was called into the principal’s office last Thursday and asked why I’d lied on my resumé about my previous place of employment. I didn’t, but they’d assumed it was a gym rather than doing their own research.” I watched his face closely, looking for any sign of deception. “Someone called the school and told them that I used to give massages at a massage parlor, and we both know the sort of assumptions that come from a statement like that.”

“Shite.”

My heart fell as recognition came into his eyes.

“It wasn’t me, lass.” He looked torn. “The other night, at dinner, Keli said something about how I probably wasn’t the only parent you hit on at parent-teacher conferences–”

“She saidwhat?”

“I told her that wasn’t what happened,” he said quickly. “I said we’d met before school started, and she wanted to know how. I wasn’t going to tell her, but then she said she’d ask you and I didn’t want to put you in that situation. I just told her that I’d been looking for a massage for sore muscles, and then I’d seen you again at MacLeans. I swear, I dinnae say anything else. Keli must’ve called the school and told them that bit.”

I wasn’t thrilled that he’d told Keli, but it sounded like he hadn’t given her the full story. Since it would’ve shown him in a worse light than me, it made sense. It wasn’t his fault that she’d tried to screw me over at work with it. I’d already had the impression that she wasn’t fond of me. This just solidified it.

“I’ll talk to her. She’ll leave you be,” he promised. “Are you in trouble?”

“No. I hadn’t lied about it, and I told them if they called, Lihua would vouch for the respectability of the business.”