Page 20

Chapter 20

Piper

“Y ou’re up early,” Quinn said as she shuffled into the kitchen, her blonde hair tangled and her sleep shirt hanging off one shoulder.

More like I’d just gotten home from spending the night at Zeke’s place and had gone straight to the kitchen to make some much needed coffee.

Pouring Quinn a cup, I slid it over to her, debating on how to respond.

“Wait.” She stopped the mug before it reached her lips. “Why are you wearing the same clothes you had on yesterday?”

I bit my lip.

Her eyes went wide, and her brows almost hit her hairline. “Did you just get home? You stayed the night? Oh, my gosh, what does this mean?” Her questions came in rapid fire.

“Calm down.” I pulled out another mug for myself. “Yes, I just got home. Yes, I stayed the night, but nothing happened.” I grabbed the pot of coffee, pausing before I poured. “Mostly.”

“Mostly?” she shouted. “What does that mean?”

“I didn’t sleep with him, if that’s what you’re thinking,” I said, filling up my mug. “Well, I did sleep with him,” I added, setting the pot back down. “But not like sleep with him sleep with him.” I hurried to amend.

She held up a hand to stop me. “Hold on. Start from the beginning.”

And so, I did. I told her about making dinner together, about the conversations we’d had, how sweet and vulnerable he’d been, how we’d cuddled and teased each other throughout the movie, and how I’d accidentally fallen asleep on him sometime during the night.

“I think you’re leaving something out.” She moved her hand around the general area of my hair.

I patted the back of my hair, realizing it was a tangled mess too. I hadn’t thought to look in a mirror before coming home.

“There might have been some kissing involved,” I admitted. I could still feel his fingers in my hair as he’d kissed me, like he couldn’t get enough of the feel of me. My cheeks warmed at the memory.

She arched her brow. “ Some kissing?”

“Okay, fine,” I relented. “There was a lot of kissing. But that was it. He was a perfect gentleman, and kissing was as far as things went.”

“You haven’t answered my last question,” she said. “What does this mean? Are you two a couple for real now?”

I almost choked on my sip of coffee. “What? No! Just because we shared a nice evening and some kisses doesn’t mean we’re a couple. Neither of us believes in relationships, so I’m not really sure what it all means or where we stand.” I shrugged, taking another sip, not wanting to think about all the details of what was going on between Zeke and me.

She eyed me over her mug. “After your night together, it sure seems like you believe in relationships.”

“Quinn,” I sighed. “You know how I feel about relationships. Especially with a hockey player. And especially a hockey player who is on the team I work for. I don’t want another repeat of what happened with Jordan.”

Even if my actions last night contradicted my words this morning, my thoughts about getting into a relationship with a hockey player were the same. I just couldn’t seem to remember them when I was with Zeke. I blamed him and how he smelled so good, how he made me smile, how he seemed to open up just for me, how I seemed to be the one person who could make him happy, to make that hidden raincloud of his that followed him around disappear.

But nothing good would come of us getting together. It wasn’t smart. And it definitely wasn’t safe for my heart. Now that we were a few miles apart, I could think straight. As much as I liked Zeke, it wouldn’t be right to keep going the way we were. Between our anti-relationship feelings and working together, it would eventually end up in a disaster.

Although I was pretty sure the next time I saw him, I was going to want to throw my arms around him and kiss him. Gosh, I was such a mess. Again, I blamed Zeke.

Last night had possibly been one of the best nights of my life. It had almost felt like a dream, like I was living someone else’s life. Or maybe living out a scene from a romance movie. It had all felt too perfect, too right. And usually when things were too good to be true, they were.

Quinn’s eyes softened. “Zeke isn’t Jordan.”

“I know.” Or at least, I thought I knew.

Yes, Zeke and Jordan were very different, but the bottom line was they were both professional athletes for a team I worked for. And though I couldn’t picture Zeke ever cheating, I could see him breaking my heart if I let him in. That was the biggest—and possibly scariest— difference between Zeke and Jordan.

Jordan had broken my trust and my belief in love, but not my heart. Looking back now, I could see that I had never truly been in love with him—I’d been more in love with the idea of having found someone to be with.

Zeke, on the other hand, was the kind of guy who you would fall head over heels for, that when things ended you’d never be able to fully recover. And I didn’t know if I was willing to give my heart to someone who could break it so thoroughly that there was a high likelihood it would never heal.

Zeke was still figuring out his own path. Soon, whether it was this year or in the next couple of years, he would experiencing a huge life change, one he felt lost in how to navigate, and I wasn’t sure I would still be the person he wanted by his side once he passed through the storm.

Yeah, right now things were great between us. Everything was new and exciting. Everything was easy because we lived in the same city and worked at the same place. But what about if he got traded again? Or retired? What would that mean for our future? I didn’t think I was strong enough to risk something like that with someone who was currently trying to decide what was next in his life. He needed to figure out himself and his life first before we could entertain the idea of anything more than a fun night together.

“Well,” Quinn said, dragging me out of my thoughts. “Whatever you decide, I’ll be here to support you.”

That was something I did know. Quinn and I would always be there for each other, no matter what happened in our lives.

I gave her a side hug, squeezing her to me. “I know. And I’m so grateful for that.”

I didn’t know what I would do without Quinn. She was my only family, and I would feel lost and alone without her.

I thought about Zeke and how he didn’t have any family he could turn to. A small pang in my heart had me forgetting all about being smart and safe. I wanted to be the person he could turn to, and in a way last night, I felt like I had been.

I finished my coffee and set my mug in the sink. “I’d better go get ready for work.”

“Yeah, me too,” she said, taking the last sip of her coffee.

I headed to the bathroom.

“Oh, and good luck trying to not make out with Zeke!” she yelled after me, and I could hear the teasing in her voice.

I rolled my eyes even though she couldn’t see me, but I was going to need all the luck I could get to not throw myself into Zeke’s arms when I saw him today.

By the time I walked into the arena, my nerves were at an all-time high. How were things going to be between us? I’d had all morning at home getting ready to relive our night together, plus remind myself all the reasons why we shouldn’t take things any farther. Including how it was almost February and there were still plenty of months of hockey season left to try to combat these feelings for him. I was a jumbled mess. Somehow, I wanted to both see him and not see him. It was all very confusing.

As I walked past the entrance to the ice rink, I could see the team was already practicing. I tried not to look for Zeke, but my eyes found number twenty-seven all on their own. My traitorous heart leapt at the sight of him. I never got tired of watching the way he glided across the ice, his movements both quick and graceful. And embarrassingly enough, I had watched him play a lot during his career. My silly crush on him over the years had been just that—silly. Now that I knew the man under the helmet and jersey, knew that he was kind, protective, funny, sweet, charming, down-to-earth—okay, you get the idea. He was impossible not to like.

I shook my head, trying to clear out my feelings for Zeke. Tearing my eyes from him, I hurried off to my office, needing to get some paperwork done before the players were done with practice.

Zeke was always the last to see me after practice, almost like he wanted everyone else to be gone so we could be alone. I didn’t mind and secretly liked how we could have the therapy room to ourselves. Now I was both excited and anxious about being alone with him. I didn’t know if I could trust myself. One look at him on the ice, and heat flooded through me. What was I going to do when we were together in an enclosed room and he was no longer covered by hockey pads, showcasing that muscled body in a fitted t-shirt and sweats? Oh, and with my hands on him. Couldn’t forget that part.

Yeah, I was in big trouble when it came to Zeke Lawson.