Page 45

Sadie picks me up this morning from Lincoln’s house in record time.

I’m starting to wonder if she wasn’t at our apartment when I called, because there’s no way she could’ve made it to his house in ten minutes.

I plan to question her as soon as I have some caffeine in my system.

Once we get home, we’re both too tired to cook breakfast, so we pull up DoorDash.

We order some coffee and egg sandwiches which are delivered within ten minutes.

Now we’re sitting on the living room floor, waiting for the other to speak first as we unwrap our sandwiches.

Sadie hands me a napkin from the to-go bag and finally breaks the silence.

“So you wanna tell me why I had to rescue you before nine this morning?”

I grab the napkin from her and place it on the coffee table next to my breakfast.

Do I want to tell her what happened?

She probably already knows because she’s freakishly good at figuring things out before I even tell her.

Her intuition is truly scary sometimes.

Rather than diving into my morning, I answer her question with a question.

“Do you want to tell me where you were this morning before nine? Because there’s no way you came from our apartment. It takes at least fifteen minutes to get to Lincoln’s from here, and that’s without morning rush hour traffic. You made it there in ten.”

Sadie looks completely unaffected by my question as she takes a sip of her tea.

“I had a sunrise yoga session this morning.”

Bullshit.

It’s freaking freezing outside.

“It’s December. You’re telling me you were outside enjoying the sunrise?” I take a bite of my egg sandwich and it’s so good I can’t help but moan while I chew.

Sadie takes a bite of her sandwich and she echoes my moan with her own.

“Damn. These are delicious.” She finishes chewing her food and wipes her mouth before answering my question.

“I never said I was outside. There’s a place downtown that has this awesome greenhouse contraption on their roof, but only half of it is actually filled with plants. A yoga instructor booked the space for a sunrise session and I was lucky enough to sign up before it sold out. It was pretty awesome actually.”

It’s not lost on me that Sadie is still struggling to find her place here in Green Bay.

We haven’t actually talked about what her next steps are, but I can tell the lack of a job is starting to weigh on her.

Which is why I don’t pester her with questions.

She’s free to stay here until she figures out her next move and she knows that.

She sets her food down and leans back onto her hands.

There’s a small smirk on her mouth and a slight lift of her eyebrows.

“Now, are you gonna spill? Or am I going to have to guess what happened? You know I will.”

Instead of prolonging the inevitable, I decide to just fill her in on everything.

She already knew my plans to show up completely naked under my coat, so I spare her the details of that.

I tell her a little bit about Lincoln’s nightmare, but keep the details down to a minimum because I respect his privacy.

Finally I get to the drama of the morning with his cousin showing up, and Sadie instantly springs forward with her mouth gaping.

“Oh my god! You almost got caught in the act! The secret relationship trope is such a good one. So many close calls and stolen touches. I am truly living vicariously through you two.”

Gathering all of our garbage, I put it in the brown paper bag it was delivered in and stand to throw it away.

“This is not one of our raunchy romance novels, Sadie. It’s not all that exciting.”

Sadie follows me into the kitchen and leans her hip against the counter, eyeing my every move.

Once I get everything thrown away, I still feel her eyes on me.

I turn to her and throw my arms out wide.

“What is it? Say what you need to say, Sadie. Just quit staring at me, you creep.”

Her arms are crossed over her chest and she’s wearing a look on her face that I can’t quite decipher.

“You’re scared.”

The statement slams against me with the force of a freight train.

I take a step back, physically affected by her accusation.

“I’m not scared.” It comes out a bit sharper than I intend, but luckily Sadie doesn’t take it personally.

She raises her eyebrow and I know she doesn’t believe me.

Hell, I don’t know if I believe me.

Was I scared that his cousin almost caught us together this morning?

I don’t know if scared is the right word.

Worried?

Nervous?

Maybe.

I don’t think his cousin would sell the story to the tabloids, but the thought of one wrong person finding out has me apprehensive as hell.

I tell her exactly that and she shakes her head at me.

“No, I didn’t mean you were scared of his cousin finding out. You’re scared you’re falling for him.”

This sixth sense bullshit she pulls is really starting to grate my nerves.

I don’t even bother denying it.

“Maybe. What the hell are we going to do if we want this to be more? Are we supposed to date in between games? Is that even allowed?” According to Lincoln, there’s nothing in the rules that states we aren’t allowed to, but still.

“The press will have a field day if we date in public. Every internet troll would be screaming, ‘I told you so’ from the rooftops. It’s exactly the type of thing they said would happen with a female coach in the league.”

I realize I’m pacing back and forth in the kitchen, my anxiety and emotions keying me up and causing me to move.

What the hell was I even thinking, starting this up with him in the first place?

“Ellie—” Sadie’s phone dings from the coffee table, interrupting her before she can continue.

She holds up one finger and runs into the living room to grab her phone.

A smile splits across her face but she doesn’t say a word.

I’m still pacing but I see her fingers moving fast across her screen.

“Who has you smiling like an idiot over there?”

She types something else on her phone then puts it in the tiny side pocket of her yoga pants.

I continue my pacing as she takes a seat on one of the stools at the island.

“It’s just Hunter. Don’t try to change the subject. Ellie, there will always be idiots on the internet who think they have the right to put down others. There is no escaping that. And no, you are not doing what they said you’d do. You’re not peeking into the locker room to watch the guys change or falling in love with one of the players. You’re kicking ass at rebuilding this team and you’re having a life outside of work. Hell, you guys are second in your division after being dead last the previous season, and that’s all thanks to you, Lincoln, and Hunter. Fuck what everyone else says. You’re not doing anything wrong.”

My pacing slows, and I turn to look at my best friend.

Sadie loves me something fierce and the serious look on her face says she’s ready to go to war against anyone who says otherwise.

I lean my arms onto the island and rest my face in my hands.

“I just don’t want to screw anything up. The team. Things with me and Lincoln. Everything is just so good right now.”

Sadie reaches across the counter and she pulls my hand away from my face.

“You’re not screwing anything up. Stop worrying about things that haven’t happened yet. Keep kicking ass behind the bench and keep seeing Lincoln behind the scenes. Nothing has to change. But Ellie, you have to be honest with yourself about how you feel. And you should probably be honest with Lincoln too.”

She holds my hands as I let her words sink in.

I know I need to admit to myself that what I’m feeling goes well beyond anything physical.

I’ve never felt like this about anyone in my life before.

It’s hard for me to come to terms with it all.

Life has a way of keeping us on our toes.

One minute I’m dreading showing up to work with Lincoln, and the next I’m counting down the minutes until I see him again.

It’s absolutely terrifying.

What if he doesn’t feel the same way I do?

Sadie’s right, though.

I’m falling for him and I’m afraid he won’t be there to catch me.

“What if he doesn’t feel the same way about me?” It sounds even more pathetic when I say it out loud, but I do feel lighter now that I’ve said it.

Sadie gets up from her stool and walks around the island.

Her arms are around me before I can even fully turn my body toward her.

“If he doesn’t feel the same way, then he’s an idiot.” She pulls her head back to look at me but keeps her arms wrapped around me.

“But you’ll never know if you’re too afraid to say anything. You could miss out on something amazing. The Ellie Montgomery I know doesn’t back down because she’s scared. She runs head first into the unknown with her head held high.”

I grab my best friend and hug her as hard as I can.

She may not know how truly scary my life has been at times.

My mom’s accident.

The pressure that comes with playing in the Olympics and PWHL.

Showing up to work in a man’s world.

But she’s right about one thing—fear has never stood in my way before.

And I sure as hell am not going to let it now.