Page 36

“Shit. I didn’t mean to call you Blondie. It just slipped out.” Panicking, I pull back to meet Ellie’s eyes and am relieved to see she’s smiling.

Hell, she’s not smiling, she’s laughing at me.

Her body shakes with laughter and I pull her back into me.

“Keep laughing at me and I’m gonna make you pay for it later,” I say, teasing this gorgeous woman in my arms.

“Don’t tease me with a good time,” she says before turning her head and planting a kiss on my chest.

How is this even real life?

Ellie isn’t the only one surprised by this situation.

Have I always found her attractive?

Absolutely.

But this is more than that.

The way her body fits with mine, and the feeling I have right now, having her in my arms, is so much more than lust.

I want to know everything there is to know about this woman.

It’s that realization that has me asking my next question.

“Stay the night with me?”

Ellie pulls back so she’s staring at me, and I think she’s about to bail.

I can see the hesitancy in her eyes.

Before she can say no, I cut her off.

“We can order Chinese, go for round two, watch a movie. Whatever you want. Just…stay? ”

She surprises me next by leaning in and giving me a slow, lingering kiss on the lips.

She pulls back just enough so our lips are barely touching.

“Look who’s begging now?”

I roll her over onto her back and start tickling her sides until she’s completely out of breath.

“Okay, okay! Stop, Lincoln! I’ll stay!”

My body hovers over her perfect, naked figure and I swear there’s so much tension in the air, it’s almost tangible.

I can feel myself growing as the seconds tick by and I sit suspended above her, neither of us daring to move an inch.

Slowly, I lean in and kiss the lips that are begging for my touch.

She opens her mouth as an invitation but we’re interrupted by her stomach growling something fierce.

I pull back and look down at her stomach at the same time her hand flies up to cover her mouth in embarrassment.

“Oh my god, that is so embarrassing,” she says behind her hand.

“I didn’t eat much at Niko’s. I was so busy getting to know everyone’s families, I forgot to get up for seconds. And I’m pretty sure we just burned whatever calories I consumed this afternoon.”

I give her a quick kiss before hopping off the bed.

Our clothes are strewn all over my bedroom and it takes me a second to find her panties, which somehow ended up on the top of my mirror that sits on my dresser.

I toss them her way.

“Let’s get dressed and order some food. We’re going to need energy for what I have planned for you tonight.”

Ellie’s lace panties are halfway up her legs when she pauses to look at me.

“Oh yeah? You think you can last all night?” she asks as she continues to slide her panties up the rest of the way.

I track the movements and am lost in dirty thoughts when I’m pelted in the face by my undershirt.

Snagging the shirt and pulling it over my head I apologize for missing her insult.

“I was too busy imagining those legs wrapped around me. What did you say?”

She abandons her leggings and walks toward me wearing only her panties.

I’m stunned silent and my dick is the hardest it’s ever been.

Her tits bounce as she stops in front of me and places a hand on my chest.

Round two already?

Hell yeah!

Ellie leans in and her hand starts sliding down my body.

My dick is at full attention, ready and waiting.

She reaches down, but instead of grabbing my cock, she grabs my button-down off the floor.

Oblivious to the hardest erection of my life, she pulls my shirt on and buttons it up just enough that I can see the swell of her breasts peeking out.

Then, without a word, she pats my chest and leaves the room.

An hour later we’re back in my bed.

Unfortunately, we aren’t going for round two.

Yet.

I did get to enjoy a nice appetizer of her spread out for me on my kitchen counter, though.

If I had any say, I would’ve feasted on her all night.

We’re sitting in my bed, with far too many boxes of Chinese food for two people, talking about everything under the sun.

It’s like we’ve jam packed dates one through five in the past hour.

We’ve learned each other’s favorite colors, foods, movies, etc.

You name it, we’ve probably talked about it.

It’s surface level stuff, but I can’t remember the last time I had this much fun.

“You’re telling me you’d rather have Black Panther on your team than Iron Man? No frickin way, Scott,” Ellie says as she grabs another crab rangoon from the container in the middle of the bed.

Shaking my head and swallowing down the rest of my eggroll, I give her my rebuttal.

“Black Panther has vibranium! And in an enclosed space or hand-to-hand combat, Black Panther is kicking his ass every time. ”

“Okay, but in literally any other scenario, Iron Man is kicking ass. He has more advanced technology and fire power. It’s no contest, Scott. You’re wrong. I’m right. End of story.”

This woman.

I put my hands up in defeat.

“Okay, okay. You win. This time.”

We both smirk at each other and continue to eat in comfortable silence.

I don’t usually do sleepovers with women.

Okay, if we’re being honest, I haven’t done anything with a woman in a very long time.

And when I did, sleepovers were a hard no.

It felt far too intimate for me and I’d much rather keep things casual.

After a while, even that lost its appeal, which is why I chose to put my head down and focus on work.

But sitting here with Ellie…

I don’t hate it.

No, I don’t hate it at all.

Well, I didn’t hate it until Ellie asks her next question.

“Whatever happened to your dad?” She asks the question in such a soft tone, I know she’s trying to be gentle with me.

It still doesn’t stop the hairs on the back of my neck from rising.

Just the thought of that man makes me feel uneasy.

Ellie must sense my trepidation, because she reaches over and covers my hand with hers.

“You don’t have to tell me, Lincoln. I just thought… Since we talked about it earlier, you might want to talk a little more?”

She doesn’t remove her hand from mine as she waits for my answer.

I turn my hand and give hers a little squeeze before leaning back against my headboard.

“I want to tell you. I just don’t know where to start.”

Ellie moves all of the food to the opposite end of the bed before crawling over to me and resting her head in my lap.

She doesn’t say anything, she just lays there drawing circles on my legs as she waits.

It’s such a simple thing, but she’s giving me the space and time to work this out in my head and go at my own pace.

She’ll never know how grateful I am for her kindness.

I’ve never really told anyone much about my father.

My cousin Katie is the only one who knows the whole story.

Well, I guess Hunter knows some of it now too.

I may not be ready to give Ellie all of it, but I can let her in and give her something.

I want her to know every piece of me because I want to know every piece of her.

Leaning down and looking at this beautiful woman in my lap, I make the decision to take the leap.

“I don’t really have any good memories of my father. I wish I could say he wasn’t always a monster but I’d be lying. Even when I was a little kid learning how to skate, he would berate me and shame me for every slip and fall. He’d keep me outside on our pond for hours until I skated so many laps without falling. Hell, I think I was only four at the time. My mother would scream at him to give me a break, but he’d ignore her or backhand her and crack open another beer.”

Ellie stops the circles on my leg for a beat.

I can tell she wants to say something, but doesn’t.

I start playing with the strands of her hair to let her know I’m okay, and she continues drawing circles on my leg.

I take a deep breath and continue.

“My mom did her best to protect me from it. She’d tell me to go in my room and put on my headphones. He never laid a hand on me. Until he did. Until I was old enough to step in and try to stop it. Well, at least I thought I was old enough. I think I was only nine the first time I jumped in front of my mom to stop his assault. At that point, she had become a shell of the woman she once was. She no longer checked in on me after a particularly horrible night. No more bedtime stories. No more breakfast waiting for me in the morning. She just kind of…disappeared before my eyes. Then, a week after my tenth birthday, she really did disappear.”

Ellie turns over in my lap so she’s looking up at me.

She puts her hand on my face, but still, she doesn’t say a word .

Her silence in this moment is a gift.

There’s nothing she could say that could possibly make this any easier to relive and she seems to get that.

But this simple gesture, her hand on my cheek, she’s letting me know she’s here.

She’s letting me know I’m not alone.

I reach down and cup her cheek with my own hand and we stare at each other.

We simply exist in this heavy moment.

Together.

Rubbing my thumb in a small circle on her cheek, I continue.

“After my mom left, my dad got angrier. Or drunk. Well, he got both. He’d sometimes disappear for days at a time and there would be no food in the house. I was too young to even get a part-time job so I was thankful for the meals provided at school. The days he did come home, he’d make sure to rough me up a little bit before disappearing again. I did my best to hide the worst of it from my cousin. Clearly, I couldn’t fool her because she started bringing extra food to school and insisting I come to her house every day. I started spending more time at her house with my aunt and uncle. They’d take me to my hockey practices. My dad would show up to my games—most of the time drunk—and then disappear again. It’s like he couldn’t stand being around me, but he still wanted the opportunity to make me feel shitty about myself. He used hockey as his weapon and I used it as my sanctuary. I was never good enough in his eyes, but out there on the rink, I was safe. I had a purpose.”

Ellie sits up and climbs into my lap.

She leans her forehead against mine and then wraps me in a tight hug.

She stays silent and holds me for a minute.

When she lets go, she stays in my lap with her head in the crook of my neck.

Her fingers start to play with my chest hair.

“How did you get out? What happened?”

I realize with everything I said, I never answered her question .

“When I was sixteen, he knocked me out cold and Katie found me. She called the cops, even though I told her not to bother. He disappeared for a while but the cops finally found him a few towns over in some bar. He was arrested. It was his only offense on record so he got out after only like two years, I think. At least that’s what Katie told me. I haven’t heard from him since.”

Ellie’s hand stops moving and she flattens her palm against my heart.

She looks up at me with a look I can’t quite place.

It’s not pity in her eyes.

It looks more like…

remorse.

“Lincoln, I had no idea. I was so horrible to you and you were—” She shakes her head before meeting my eyes again.

“You were just surviving. I’m so sorry.”

This woman hears my story and thinks it's her job to apologize to me. This thoughtful, selfless, beautiful woman.

I give her a quick kiss on the forehead. “It’s not you who should be apologizing. It’s my parents. Hell, I should be apologizing to you. I took it all out on you at the rink. I blamed you.”

She’s shocked by my confession and truthfully, I’m a bit shocked too. I didn’t want to go there tonight, but I appear to be baring my soul, so what’s one more secret?

“My dad used to compare me to you. After every game, or if we’d see you at the rink. He’d say things like How could you let some girl beat you like that? How does it feel to be weaker than her? I guess I should have had a daughter since my son is so embarrassing out there. I know now, after years of therapy, that it wasn’t your fault. But back then, I hated you. I used to think, if it wasn’t for you, maybe my dad would love me more. It’s stupid. But, yeah, that’s why I hated you so much. That’s why it was so difficult when I found out you were my assistant coach. It brought back a lot of trauma and I’m not proud that I let it control me again. I’m sorry for how I treated you at the beginning of the year, Ellie. I have no excuse. I’m just so sorry. ”

I’m not sure what I expect, but I don’t expect Ellie to yank my head down to kiss me. But I’m not mad about it.

Ellie’s lips are on mine, and my worries immediately wash away. She should hate me. She should be angry that I took everything out on her. Instead, she’s kissing me and bringing me back to life.

Ellie pulls back but keeps her hand wrapped around my neck. “I forgive you.”