Page 13

DAVINA

After my sister had forced me to get dressed and grocery shop with her, we decided to sit on the deck, with the string lights glowing.

It’d rained earlier, and the weather had dropped to a cool seventy degrees, which was a nice reprieve from the blazing-hot start of summer.

I cozied up on one of the upholstered outdoor seats with a glass of wine as I inhaled the fresh, damp air. We’d had dinner, and I helped myself to two glasses. Hell, I’d already guzzled down a whole bottle the night before. I didn’t see the point in stopping now. So much for that lifestyle change.

I mean, technically, we were celebrating Lewis’s birthday. We even bought cupcakes again, so that made it an occasion.

The reason I changed my drinking habits was because everything had changed after Lewis’s diagnosis. I’d been so strong for him when he cried, lost his hair, and lived in pain. But behind every strong person is an even stronger vice. Mine was wine.

I wouldn’t have considered myself an alcoholic, but whenever I’d needed to loosen up and kill the noise, I’d grabbed a bottle. I’d have a glass or two every night after work, but when life got harder, I’d tack on another glass.

There had been one night in particular, when I created my vow to slow down on drinking. Lew was feeling ill, so I helped him get into bed early. I thought he was asleep, so while I worked, I drank about two or three glasses of wine. Eventually, the work was put aside, and I fell asleep on the couch.

What I didn’t realize then was that Lew woke up in the middle of the night and vomited several times. Meanwhile, my sorry ass was passed out a room away and oblivious to it.

When he told me about it the next morning, I wanted to cry. I felt so guilty for not being there for him. He kept assuring me it was fine, that he was okay, but none of it was okay. I’d drunk myself into a damn coma while my husband had been suffering all night.

It was that day I had promised him and myself I’d cut back on drinking. I’d needed to change anyway ... but I suppose none of that really mattered anymore.

Octavia took the chair next to mine and spread a blanket over her legs.

“Hey,” I called as she held her glass in the air to adjust herself without spillage. When she looked up, I smiled. “Thank you for being here for me these last couple of days, Octavia—hell, the last couple of months . It means a lot.”

“Oh, girl. Stop. That’s what I’m here for.” She waved a dismissive hand at me, but I didn’t miss the proud grin on her face.

“No, I mean it. I wouldn’t even be functioning right now if it weren’t for you.”

“Well, you know Mama and Abe were here too. Did you call her?”

“Here we go. Just take the gratitude, Tavia.” I swirled my wine in the glass.

Yes, my mom and little brother had come down once they’d heard about Lew, and they’d been there for the funeral. But that’s what mothers were supposed to do, right? Be there for their daughters? Make sure they were okay?

I wasn’t sure why this feeling had come over me the last few years, but I’d developed a bitterness toward my mother that I couldn’t shake. It was stupid, because all I had to do was let it go and pretend nothing was wrong, like I had all those years ago, but that was hard to do when I realized how short life was.

The decisions she’d made when I was younger affected me even now. I bet my life could’ve been so much better had she stepped up to the plate, but she hadn’t until I was almost out of high school.

“I’m just saying!” My sister threw an innocent hand in the air. “If Abe didn’t have camp, she’d be here right now.”

I pursed my lips. I wanted to ignore Octavia, but when I met her eyes, I softened.

“I know.” I sighed, glancing at my little sister again. She gave me a you know what to do look. “I’ll call her tomorrow.”

“See? So easy, girl.”

My mouth twitched just as my doorbell rang.

“Who is that?” Octavia asked, eyeing me.

That was a good question, considering it was nearly eight o’clock at night.

I checked the security camera app on my phone, but when I saw who it was, I grimaced. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

I climbed out of my chair and went inside to open the front door. A woman stood on the other side, her snow-white skin flushed and her hair in a neat chestnut bun atop her head.

Her brows were so thin they may as well have been penciled in, and her eyes ... well, I couldn’t hate them, because they were just like Lew’s. Hazel and surrounded by thick lashes. It was my former mother-in-law, Gloria Roberts.

I leaned against the frame of the door and folded my arms. “Have you ever heard of a phone call, Gloria?”

Gloria turned her nose up at me. “It’s the first birthday of Lewis’s since he passed,” she stated.

“I’m well aware of that.”

“I was on this side of town and thought I’d visit his grave. That’s when I remembered the photo album with all his baby pictures in them. He asked to borrow it so he could show them to you .”

She looked me up and down in my sweats and hoodie, like she was searching for whatever it was about me that appealed to her son.

“Do you want your photo album back?” I asked, ready for her to get out of my face already.

“I do,” she replied curtly.

I stepped back to let her into the house, and she closed the door behind her. I retrieved the baby-blue photo album from the cabinet of the TV stand and carried it to her.

“None of the pictures have been removed, have they?”

“No, Gloria. I can assure you all the pictures are there.”

She narrowed her eyes at me, then pointed her attention over my shoulder. Octavia was walking inside, her lips pressed and her arms crossed as she looked my mother-in-law from head to toe.

“Is that all?” I asked, and Gloria put her focus on me.

“Yes, that’s all.”

“Good, because we were in the middle of enjoying wine and cupcakes to celebrate Lew’s birthday.”

Gloria’s eyes watered as she averted her attention to the box of cupcakes on the counter. Her throat bobbed, and she hugged the photo album to her chest. I felt sorry for her, and that was a rare thing to feel for a woman like her.

“Would you like to join us?”

She swallowed and swiftly shook her head. “No. I have a busy night. Goodbye, Davina.”

I watched her walk out the door and shook my head. Why couldn’t she be a normal person? Always with her dramatic entrances and judgment.

I hate saying it, but Gloria Roberts was a stuck-up bitch, and though I hated the stigma of daughters disliking their mothers-in-law, I truly did not like mine. She’d made it that way, though, and it’d only gotten worse after Lewis died. She kept telling me I should’ve tried harder for him—that I should’ve been awake when he died, as if I wasn’t carrying enough guilt about it.

When it came to Lew’s wake, Gloria had been the worst . It was common knowledge that she liked to be the center of attention, but that day she made everything about her.

She didn’t like the food, so she ordered a meal from DoorDash she could eat. She didn’t want to see images of me and Lew together inside my house, so she stayed outside the majority of the time, smoking her cigarettes and shit-talking.

She didn’t even say goodbye when she left, but she kept popping by for little things afterward, like Lew’s football jersey from college, or the fedora his dad had passed down to him. It was vintage, and she felt it was important to hold on to.

I had never minded giving her those things. The only thing that bugged me was that she never provided a heads-up. She just showed up at my doorstep like I was meant to be at her service. She’d blamed me for everything that went wrong in Lew’s life, even his cancer.

“You’re the one who’s killing him. You’re the reason he’s so sick!” I could still remember her shouting that in my face when Lew told her about the diagnosis.

“Why is that heffa always popping up?” Octavia grumbled when we were back in our seats on the deck.

“I don’t know, but I swear I might end up going off on her one day. She’s really been testing my patience.”

Octavia laughed as my phone vibrated. It was a notification for a new email, but I had to read who it was from twice, because I thought my mind was playing tricks on me.

Davina,

I hope you don’t mind me reaching out to you like this. I told Arnold to give me your email address. Just checking in with you. Hope you’re good. I know you’ve probably heard this a million times and are sick of it, but I’m truly sorry for your loss. If I’d known, I never would’ve brought your husband up at Silver Wolf.

Keep your head up.

Deke

I tugged on the string of my hoodie while reading the email again. First the flowers to my house and now this?

I probably shouldn’t have emailed him back so quickly—he was my colleague, after all—but he’d sent the tulips, which were pretty and thoughtful, and the man had carved time out of his schedule to type up a personal condolence letter.

I pressed Reply.

Hey Deke,

Thank you for reaching out and for checking on me. You didn’t have to do that. Seriously. But thank you. The flowers are gorgeous. I’m surprised you remembered tulips are my favorite. I am curious how you got my home address, though. Don’t tell me you’re stalking me now.

Also, very sorry the rebranding party got rescheduled but I hope you can make the new date!

P.S. Why an email this time instead of a DM?

Thanks again for checking in.

Talk soon,

Davina

I read the last question in my reply again, debating whether to keep or delete it. Deke wasn’t a man with a lot of time on his hands, and any other person would’ve just given condolences the next time they saw me or not brought it up at all.

Not Deke, though, and I wanted to know why.

I pressed Send and sipped red wine as I waited for his response.

“Who are you texting?” The blue light of Octavia’s phone highlighted her face.

“It’s the basketball player we signed to endorse Golden Oil. Deke Bishop. He emailed me.”

At that, Octavia lowered her phone and gave me her full attention. “How in the world did you manage that?”

“I didn’t manage anything.” I laughed. “He’s the one who sent the tulips. I guess he was making sure I got them.”

“He sent you flowers and a follow-up email? That’s dedication.”

“Dedication for what?”

She sucked her teeth. “To get in those panties, girl! Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about!”

“Octavia! No!” I waved a dismissive hand at her, fighting a laugh. “First of all, it’s too soon for any of that. Second of all, it’s not even like that with him. He’s pretty cool for a famous athlete.”

“Yeah. Okay.” She delivered a playful scoff and lifted her phone. “If that’s what you wanna tell yourself.”

As she scrolled, I couldn’t deny that Deke trying to get in my panties wasn’t a thought in the back of my mind. He’d made it perfectly clear at Silver Wolf that he was into me, that he wanted to get to know me, and that the only things stopping him from making a serious move were the rings on my finger.

But back then, he thought I was still married, and fortunately, he respected that. I didn’t know how to explain it, but after receiving the flowers and the email, I didn’t feel like it was an agenda or a scheme from him. Or maybe I was just being naive about it, and he really was doing this to catch me at my lowest and make his move.

That would’ve been extremely shallow of him, though, and a title like that didn’t suit a man like him.

Still, I had to be careful. I wasn’t looking to be serious with anyone right now.

I guzzled down the rest of my wine, climbed out of my chair, and said over my shoulder, “I’m getting a cupcake!”