Page 19

TREVOR

I don’t want to take Andy back to the hotel. I want to keep him all to myself. But Daddy keeps yawning. I’m not sure that he’s used to so much walking in the heat. The breeze is nice, but it’s still hot.

“You need a nap.” I nod towards the hotel in the distance.

We don’t talk much on the walk back. My mouth is dry from talking so much, but not in a bad way.

Andy yawns. “Not ready to let you go.” Another yawn and another.

“Come on Daddy, you needs a nappy nap.”

He chuckles and follows my lead. I grab Bandit at the front desk before taking Andy all the way back to his room. The fact he’s in room 69 makes me giggle when I think about it, but makes it easy to remember.

“Would you like to join me?” Andy says once he unlocks the door.

I stumble back. “I—I had a lot of fun. But?—”

“Just to sleep, sweetheart. Not sex.”

I blink back and swallow. “No sex?”

“No, sweetheart. I’m too tired for that. But I think there’s something you’re not telling me. Which is fine. I won’t pressure you into telling me. But I’d like to cuddle if you’re open to it.”

I lick my lips and look to the king sized bed. “I really do enjoy cuddling and I didn’t get enough cuddles with you.”

He guides me into the room and shuts the door behind us. “Shoes.” He kicks his off, then uses his heels to pull off his socks. I follow suit.

“You can borrow a pair of my gym shorts if you’d like.” He nods to my khakis, which aren’t exactly the most comfortable to sleep in.

“Yes, please.” My heart pounds so freaking hard.

Wearing his clothes, that’s intimate. So intimate.

He tosses me a black pair of shorts and offers me the bathroom.

I rush in and throw water on my face, washing away the sunscreen, dirt, and grime from the beach.

I change from my shorts to his and instantly feel tired.

“Thank you, Daddy,” I say with a yawn as I exit. He’s in a pair of green shorts that totally clash with a purple t-shirt he threw on.

The room is chilly, especially compared to the outside, and I shiver.

“Let’s get under the covers.” Andy climbs into the bed and lifts the sheets, waiting for me.

I crawl in, hands shaking. I know my breathing is weird. Brain freaking out that I’m in another person’s bed.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Andy opens his arms, waiting for me.

“This was a mistake.” I try to scramble back.

“Talk to me, please.”

“I’m asexual! Gray ace, I think. I don’t know! I don’t think about sex. But when I do, I panic. It’s why none of my relationships have ever continued. You’re extremely attractive, but I’ve never?—”

“Sweetheart, I don’t care if you’re asexual. Sex never has to play into our Daddy/Little dynamic. You said you don’t want sex in your Little space, anyway. We don’t have to have a romantic relationship if you’re aromantic too, though I’d love to date you, if you’re interested.”

“I’m not aromantic,” I whisper. “I dream about having someone that loves me, weirdness and all.”

“You’re not weird,” he says. “Well, being on the ace spectrum doesn’t make you weird. The raccoons might.” He gives me a smirk and I know he’s joking. I crawl the final few paces to bury my face in his chest.

When he wraps his arms around me, I sink into his hold. Andy feels safe. I know he is.

“Oh, sweetheart, I want to throat punch everyone that made you feel weird.”

“There was one guy I thought was safe, but he was manipulating me the entire time. My high school girlfriend wanted to try things, but when I said I wasn’t ready, she dumped me.” I lift my head. “We were in high school!”

Andy snorts as he rubs a hand down my back. “Teenagers are pretty horny.”

“I know and I was, but I took care of business in my bedroom with the door shut and a box of tissues.” So many tissues.

“And too many people hit on me at the carnival. It’s so gross.

I just want to get through my day without someone coming up to me asking for my number, or where’s the best place to wink wink have fun around here.

They all just want to do things behind the buildings and that’s so unsanitary!

Plus, there’s not exactly anyplace hidden from view unless it’s the trailers.

We keep the bathrooms clean, but I still wouldn’t want to fuck in them!

” I slam a hand over my mouth. “Sorry, I don’t normally curse. ”

Andy’s lips twitch. “It’s okay, sweetheart. This once.”

I nod. “In conclusion… No one has made me feel safe enough to be comfortable enough to attempt anything sexual.”

“That’s okay. And you’re not weird for it. You’re not broken.”

Tears well in my eyes. “I know, but other people make me feel broken because of it.”

“Don’t let them get into your head. If someone makes you feel bad, let me know. We’ve only just met again, but I know you deserve better. You deserve to feel good about yourself.”

Tears slip from my eyes and soak Andy’s t-shirt beneath me. “You know all the right things to say.” But will his actions reflect his pretty words or will he be like everyone else and expect sex?

“Sleep, sweetheart. Don’t let those mean people bother you ever again.”

We don’t set an alarm. As one, we settle in, with Andy holding me close. He smells like summer, sunscreen, sun, and ocean air, all my favorite scents. I fall asleep to Andy’s soft breathing.