Page 27

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Gabriel

I put my suitcase down, thoroughly exhausted, and stare at the bed. The one bed.

“Yeah, about that…” Storm begins, stopping beside me. He’s as tired as I am, by the looks of him.

I shake my head. “I’m too tired to care.”

Shuffling over to the bed, I sit to take my shoes off. It takes much longer than normal because I don’t have the strength to move quickly.

“You forgot to mention we were coming to Hawaii,” I add.

“You didn’t ask.” Storm smirks, putting his bag in the corner before sitting on the bed and taking his shoes off, then getting down to his briefs. I dig out my pajamas and go into the bathroom to change.

The place is clean, very nice, very high end. I’m sure everything on this island is expensive.

“Do I want to know how much this place costs?” I ask as I walk back into the bedroom. Normally, I’d feel weird sharing a bed with someone. But I really am too tired to care. I’ll deal with the weird feelings in the morning. Or maybe they won’t come because this is Storm and we’ve done more personal things than sharing a bed.

“Not much,” he answers.

“Really? I thought it would be expensive. It’s very nice.” I pull the blankets down and slide in. The mattress and sheets are so soft.

“Not much in comparison, I should say,” he adds.

I turn on my side to face him. “Just tell me.”

“Don’t remember.”

“Liar. Tell me.”

“Thirteen hundred.”

“For the weekend? That’s not—”

“A night.”

“What?” I bark. “That’s insane!”

“It’s really not. Stop worrying about it and go to sleep. It’s going to be light out soon.”

I huff out a sigh and get comfortable, which isn’t difficult. This bed is the softest thing I have ever laid on, and it smells so fresh.

“Thank you for taking me,” I mutter, half asleep.

“I’m glad you came,” he responds, which makes me smile.

Then I fall asleep.

“What time are we meeting your friends?” I ask, stabbing a chunk of scrambled eggs.

“I’m not sure. They haven’t gotten back to me yet.”

“Are there others coming to the wedding?”

“Yes, but only a few. They’re keeping it small.”

“Oh—I hope I’m not imposing.”

Small weddings are usually done that way on purpose. They don’t know me, and I don’t want to ruin their intimate ceremony. The last thing I need is to be the guy who oversteps…

“They said it was fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course.”

I eat the rest of my breakfast, not sure if I enjoy this Portuguese sausage. It’s good, but a little too spicy for me.

“How small is small?” I ask, picking up my mug of coffee.

Storm leans back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest, and making the muscles in his forearms bulge. He gives me a bright smile. “Can you ever let anything go?”

“No.”

He chuckles. “They invited five people.”

“That is rather small.” I frown, staring at Storm.

“I promise it isn’t an issue. And they’re really cool.” His phone vibrates in a rhythmic pattern, and he answers the call. “Hey, I was just talking about you. Having breakfast. Yeah, of course. Yes, he is. That’ll work. Okay, see you then.”

I raise a brow, waiting for him to tell me what that was all about. He holds my gaze without saying anything for far too long, and I know he’s doing it on purpose.

“They want us to meet them for lunch at 12:30. They’re still in bed.”

“What time is the ceremony?”

“We have to be there at six.”

“And we leave tomorrow night?”

Storm smiles, and again… just stares for far too long before saying, “Yes.” Then he adds, “The next time we travel together, I’ll make sure to have an itinerary for you.”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you.”

When we finish breakfast, we go for a walk. I’ve never been to any of the islands and it’s beautiful here. We make our way down to the beach, walking along Maha'ulepu heritage trail.

“The beach here is so different from what I’m used to,” I say more to myself, but that doesn’t stop Storm from commenting.

“These islands are gorgeous.” Storm stretches, raising his arms high above his head. “I love it here.”

“You’ve been before?”

“Not to Kauai. I’ve been to the big island.”

“I traveled a lot when I was young, but not in over ten years.”

“That must have been nice, though? I’m guessing you went on family trips?”

I huff out a laugh. “Yeah, I used to think they were nice. Now I feel like everything was a lie.”

“It wasn’t a lie.”

“Feels that way.”

“Just because you see things with new eyes, doesn’t mean what you felt before was wrong.”

“Doesn’t it though? If it’s not real, if it’s not true, what’s the point?”

We fall into silence for a little as we walk, the loud crashing waves like a balm to my aching heart. My family has rankled me for a long time, and maybe for the last time. I’ve never fit in and they made it known that I didn’t. They never did a thing to make me feel like part of the family. I was a burden. But I still wanted to be part of them because they are my family, and they are all I have. But something changed that day at my parents’ when my mother went off about the anniversary party and how I better not ruin it and she expects me to be there with a date. The only thing I can say is that I was like a volcano that finally had too much, and I erupted.

They’re my family, and deep down somewhere I love them, I guess, but I’m hurt. Out of the billions of people in this world, they are the ones who are supposed to accept me for who I am. I guess I always hoped they would at some point, and the fact that it was all for nothing is what hurts the most. Now it’s just me. I’m alone. Because I’m not good enough for anyone to make a priority.

“So, hypothetically—”

“I hate hypothetical questions,” I say with a shake of my head.

“Humor me, Gabe. You’ve come this far. You’re here, you got on a plane and left in the middle of the night, you stood up to your family, what’s a little more, hm?”

I huff, running a hand over my face. “I guess you have a point.”

“Good. Now listen up. Say you marry the person of your dreams, right? You live a long, happy life. You have the best, most perfect marriage with no stress. Bills are paid. Kids are well-behaved. You go on these amazing trips every year. You have romantic date nights. Truly, you live a dream life. You following so far?”

“Hard to believe, but yes, I’m following.”

“Okay, so amazing life. So in love, right? Then one day, your partner dies. You’re devastated because your life was so perfect, but also, you’re grateful to have had such an amazing life with them. You can look back and say that you don’t regret anything, that your life was absolutely perfect.”

“Okay…”

We slow our steps, going single file to let a group of people pass by us, and when we’re side by side again, he continues to talk.

“But then you find out your partner had a secret life. A life you knew nothing about. Like maybe they were cheating.” I frown, because that sucks. Everything was just so good, and now he ruined it. “Does that take away from the life you shared together?” he asks seriously.

“Yes,” I answer quickly. There is no reason to think about that. Yes, it takes it all away. It ruins it all.

“No, think about it, Gabe. Think about everything I just said, then think about the question again.”

“I don’t need—”

“Gabe, please.”

I do as he says, knowing he won’t let it go if I don’t. I imagine a perfect life with a faceless and nameless person. I try to imagine all the things that make me happy, and wonder what that life would even look like. There’s a point I’m even smiling to myself. Could life actually be that good? But then I think about his question and that perfect image shatters.

“I’m sticking with my answer,” I say.

“Okay. Why?” he asks, not accusingly or mad. It’s pure curiosity.

“Because it was all a lie.”

“But it had been a lie the entire time. Why does the knowledge of it change the way you look at your life?”

“Because it wasn’t real. It’s like I was being tricked the whole time. It wasn’t genuine.”

“But the feelings they had for you, the things they did with you, that was all real. They loved you and showed you.”

“If they loved me, they wouldn’t have had a secret life.”

He nods and says, “I can understand that.”

“You don’t agree with me?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Then what’s your answer?”

“I don’t really have one.”

“You’re kidding?” I shake my head. “You give me a hard time about—”

“I did not give you a hard time. And honestly, it’s not that I don’t have an answer, it’s just that I don’t know how to answer that question. Sometimes I agree with you, other times it wouldn’t matter. I guess it’s all circumstantial. But I was trying to make you feel better, and I don’t think I did.”

“You didn’t, but I appreciate you trying.”

“I’ll always try to cheer you up.” He gives me a goofy grin, and I smile as I duck my head.

We walk for a while in silence, the breeze cutting the humidity and the heat that’s already rolling in. We’re out early, only having got a few hours of sleep.

“We should head back. It looks like it’s going to rain,” Storm says, looking out at the ocean.

I look up, catching the dark clouds coming in.

“Probably a good idea.”

We turn to walk back to the hotel, but we’re not even close to making it before the sky opens up and it downpours. We start to run, him moving ahead of me. When he realizes I’m falling behind, he slows and takes my hand. We run together, trying to shield ourselves, but there’s no point. Nothing we do can stop us from getting drenched. Even if we had umbrellas or ponchos, the rain is too heavy and too fast. I’m already soaked to the bone. People around us are running for cover, but they’re as wet as we are and with as far to run. Maybe farther.

Storm is laughing as he leads me, the sound muffled by the rain. I start laughing too, because how ridiculous is this?

“I think we’re going the wrong way!” he calls, coming to a stop and looking around.

The rain is so heavy I can hardly see, but I look around too, trying to see the road we came down from the hotel. All I see is ocean on one side and trees on the other. People scattering, trying to find cover. Finally, I throw my hands up.

Storm laughs even harder, then pulls me down the trail where there are fewer people running about. There is a couple on the beach, about halfway from us to the ocean. They’re colorful blobs through the downpour. The man is holding her hand as she twirls in the rain, face upwards. I imagine him smiling at her and she’s laughing. It’s beautiful that they’re embracing the chaos of the rain rather than running and hiding from it.

“I’m sorry!” Storm shouts close to my ear, and I pull my gaze from the couple to look at him. Raindrops drip down his face, small ones stuck to his lashes. His hair is soaked, stuck to his forehead. And that smile…

I shake my head, smiling. “Don’t be!”

I raise my hands up and step away from the slight cover of the trees and into the rain, lifting my face up and letting the cool rain cover me.

“What are you doing?” Storm shouts. He’s only a few feet from me, but I hardly hear him.

“I have no idea!” I laugh, getting rain in my mouth, but it feels good. It feels so free. I’ve never just… stood in the rain before. But it’s time I live a new life. One where I make the decisions and choose what is right for me.

I spin in a circle and stop to face Storm who is watching me with a curious smile. I take his hand and pull him away from the trail and the trees. He crashes into me, and we’re chest to chest. Rain drips down his face, cascading down his nose and landing on the crease of his lips before moving down his chin. He’s beautiful up close, here in the rain, drenched in rain. Flawless skin, beautiful blue eyes, full lips.

His hands go to my waist while his eyes stay on mine. I slide my hands up his arms and let them rest around his neck. I have no idea what I’m doing—what we’re doing, but it just… feels right. He isn’t pushing me away. He doesn’t look angry.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

He shakes his head slightly, eyes dipping to my mouth. “Don’t know.”

“Keep doing it,” I say.

His gaze darts back to mine, eyes slightly darker.

“I plan to.”