Page 8 of Avenging Azalea (California Made Men #2)

Chapter

Seven

TITUS

T: xo

What the hell was I thinking sending that?

I stared at the two letters, which meant something far more significant when placed together, and shook my head in disgust. My feelings were getting out of hand, and reeling them in was becoming nearly impossible.

The bigger issue was that I didn’t want to stop myself.

Too many times, I’d almost reached out to run my fingers through Fawn’s hair or said something wildly inappropriate, like she was stunning and made my heart race.

I wasn’t immune to the way she looked at me or how the tension between us had grown over the last six months.

It was easy to see that her feelings had grown into more, as had mine, but we danced around the topic, never actually saying anything and yet saying it all.

Fawn was an addiction that grew more insistent with each passing day. But we would never work. Yes, I could fuck her and get it out of both of our systems, but to what end? It would destroy what we had currently, which I didn’t want. Sex wasn’t worth that. Fawn meant far too much to me.

“Shit.” Locking my phone, I placed it down on the desk as my assistant walked into my office.

“Is there anything else you’d like done before I head home, sir,” Levi asked.

“No, but if you can take care of this pile tomorrow.” I pointed to the items I’d already signed.

“Of course, sir. Are you sure you’re alright?”

Giving him a weak smile, I nodded. “Yes, I will be. Just need to get through another family dinner without a war breaking out.”

“I’m sorry, sir. I wish your family was on better terms.”

“So do I, Levi. So do I.” I said, standing and locking my desk and cabinets before grabbing my coat.

“Don’t forget the flowers on my desk for your mother,” he said, stepping out of my office.

“Thank you, and have a good night.”

“Good night, sir.”

Watching Levi leave, I remembered the uproar hiring a male personal assistant caused with my father and Ronan.

They were pissed that I hadn’t hired someone they could sleep with, which meant I’d made the perfect choice.

Nathaniel had a few tricks up his sleeve that I loved.

He was a master at the subtle ‘Fuck you’ as he bucked against the system. I envied him and his tenacity.

With my employees gone for the night, the office was quiet.

I secured my door and grabbed the bouquet as I left.

Glancing out the window, the sky was a bright pink and orange.

It would have been a great night to take Fawn out on the boat, beautiful and calm.

She loved being out on the water, and I knew she would adore her birthday gift.

Slipping my hand into my pocket, I caressed the long velvet box, picturing the necklace designed especially for her. The wings encrusted with diamonds and emeralds would look stunning on my Little Bird.

The elevator dinged as the doors opened. I stepped inside, held my security card over the scanner, and pushed the button for the underground parking. Only family members were granted access to the heavily guarded garage.

A guard pulled my car around as I stepped out.

“Sir,” Rob said as he exited the driver’s seat. “No girls this evening,” he asked, looking around.

“No, it was bath day. Hence the sports car.”

“Oh…well, I’ll have to give them their cookies next shift.” Rob smiled.

“Thanks, Rob. You might as well lock up and head home early. My father left already and won’t be back this evening.”

“Thank you, sir. Have a good night.”

“You as well.”

I got into the Lamborghini Sian, which was custom-painted in Fawn’s favorite color.

The green was one of a kind and sparkled in the sun.

I could clearly remember the look on her face when I first brought it home.

She didn’t know it yet, but I got her a matching one for her twentieth birthday.

I had planned and purchased all her gifts for the next five years, which was insane.

Who was I trying to fool? She’d already made me lose my mind. I just didn’t want to admit it.

Pulling into my parent’s driveway, I noted that I was the last to arrive. Grabbing the flowers, I got out and greeted the guards as I passed. The closed dining room doors did nothing to mask the raised voices. Great, another typical Mikhailov family dinner.

It sounded like a gun went off when I purposely banged the doors against the wall.

Father, Ronan, and Nathaniel were on their feet, quiet and alert, as they stared at me in the doorway.

“Can we at least have a nice meal before we tear the house down? Just once, I would like to enjoy one of the wonderful dinners that Mother has planned without an argument,” I said calmly while fuming inside.

“I think we can manage that,” Father said as he sat down.

My brothers followed his lead as I stepped inside. I should start buying black and white striped suits since I spent most of my time acting as a referee.

“Thank you,” my mother whispered when she stood to hug me. She smiled, and I held her a little tighter.

“These are for you.” I held out the bouquet of her favorites.

“You’re always such a doll,” Mother said as she handed them off to one of the staff. “Please put these in a vase, and let’s set them on the table,” she said, pointing and taking her seat.

“Always the fucking suck up,” Ronan growled.

“It’s called being considerate, brother. Try thinking of someone other than yourself for a change. You may find it refreshing.”

“Fuck….” Ronan stopped as my mother smacked her hand down on the table.

“No swearing at the dinner table. Titus is right. Can we please get through one meal?”

“Where’s Aaron,” I asked, quickly changing the subject.

“He had business in New York,” Father said. I knew that but wanted to change the subject. “He secured the land for our new office building.”

The anger dissipated when the food was served. We ate and made small talk, but I was waiting for the next explosion. You could always count on at least two per family meal.

“Nathaniel, have you looked over the options I sent you,” Father asked as we finished dessert.

“If you’re referring to the women you keep trying to pawn off on me…then, no. I’m not interested,” Nathaniel said.

Father’s face darkened. Here we go.

“What the hell is wrong with you? I send you suitable princesses to choose from, and you turn your nose up like they’re garbage. This better not have anything to do with that FBI agent you’ve been pining after. You should’ve killed her instead of making a deal.”

Nathaniel growled, and his hands curled into fists on the table.

As hard as he tried, it was impossible to hide the fact that he was still in love with the woman he parted ways with four years ago.

As far as I knew, they hadn’t spoken since, but I’d seen the picture on his phone and watched how he’d thrown himself into the business.

I didn’t bother him about it. Who the hell was I to talk?

My heart was also tied to someone that I could never have.

“Keep Savannah out of this. It’s my choice whether I get married or not, and I’m not letting you push me into some marriage I don’t want,” Nathaniel said. “I don’t know why you keep thrusting this on me anyway. It’s not like I’m the next in line to take over. Why aren’t you hounding Ronan?”

“Hey! What the hell? Why are you throwing me under the bus?” Ronan glared at Nathaniel.

“Because it’s true. You’re thirty-three, not married, and no heir. Why aren’t you in the hot seat?”

My mother sagged in her chair and rubbed at her temples. All this arguing bothered her despite how hard she tried not to show it.

“I already chose for Ronan. She arrives tomorrow,” Father said, and Ronan’s mouth dropped.

“What? When were you planning on telling me?”

“I wasn’t until she got here and the paperwork was signed. You never chose, even though you said you would three years ago. So I did. As I am the head of this house and you are my successor, I have the right.”

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” Ronan yelled. His fist slammed on the table, and the silverware jumped. I was sure the dishes were as sick of this as the rest of us.

My mother shook her head but didn’t say anything about the profanity.

I placed my hand on hers, and she gripped my fingers.

She was a good woman, a great mother, and deserved so much more respect than what my father showed her.

Her children were the bright spot in her life, and when we fought, it bothered her more than all my father’s indiscretions.

Then again, seeing my father in action had made me never want to be anything like him.

“Ronan, you will marry Vera Vilanova. It’s an excellent match. She’s beautiful, comes from a powerful family, brings in multiple revenue streams, and is only twenty-three. The perfect age to produce a large family.”

Ronan jumped up so fast that his chair skidded back and fell over with a bang.

“No, I will not marry her.”

My father stood. It was extremely rare to see the two of them square off against each other. That was normally Nathaniel’s role. He looked happier than a pig in shit watching the show. He even slid further away to give them room. I shook my head.

“Yes, you will. That is an order.”

“No, I refuse. I’d rather walk away and join Uncle Vadin’s business in Russia. I’m sure he would love to have my expertise.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Father snarled while his hand slid closer to his gun. Ronan caught the movement and matched him.

“Please don’t fight,” mother said, trying to calm the situation by placing her hand on Fathers. He jerked away from her with a glare.

“Don’t interfere, woman. Know your place.”

Nathaniel was on his feet in a blink.

“Don’t talk to my mother like that,” Nathaniel yelled as he pulled his gun.

This was getting out of hand.

“I will talk to my wife however I choose. She is my property.”

“She isn’t property!”

Nathaniel was volatile at the best of times. But riled up like this, someone was likely to die. The guards clearly agreed. They entered the dining room and took sides.

No one noticed when I wiped my mouth and stood. That was about to change. With a roar that could wake the dead, I slammed my fists on the table. The pretty vase fell over, spilling water and flowers onto the floor. All eyes turned to me.

“Shut up! All of you shut the fuck up! I’ll do it. I’ll marry Vera and keep the deal in place.”

“What?” Ronan looked at me and blinked, his face the epitome of shock. “You’d do that for me?”

“Yes, because I respect family and value loyalty. I’d rather marry her than have you all killing one another.”

With every word, I bricked up my heart behind an impenetrable wall.

I would never be free to be with Fawn. It hurt far more than it should, but it was for the best. I loved Fawn and never wanted her kindness and beauty touched by the darkness of my family or this world.

I had to keep her safe from the threats that came with the Mikhailov name.

Now, the temptation to go against my better judgment was solved.

I would take the hit. It was better and safer for everyone this way.

Father relaxed his posture and faced me.

“I’m proud of you, son. She’ll be here tomorrow.

I’ve set up a meet and greet with her and her family the day after to give them time to get settled.

Oh, and Valentine’s Day is in two weeks.

We can do something special to celebrate your engagement then,” he said, smiling like his greatest plans were coming together while my world closed in on me.

“Great, just let me know the time and place,” I said and marched to the door.

“Where are you going? We have plans to discuss,” Father asked.

“I’ll sign and do whatever you want, but I need some fresh air and a day to myself,” I said and left without looking back.

Slipping into my car, I sat there staring out the windshield and tried to wrap my head around this new arrangement. What the hell had I done? Lacking any sort of answer to that question, I started the engine and drove home on autopilot.

“Boss, are you okay,” Naji asked when he greeted me at the front door.

“I will be…I think.” I gripped his shoulder and walked inside. I didn’t stop until I stood outside Fawn’s room.

The door was mostly closed, and I should’ve let her be.

Instead, I knocked softly. There was no answer, but when I pushed it open, my dogs were lying on the bed, staring at me.

My Little Bird was in the middle, surrounded like she was part of the pack.

Fawn was sound asleep, her arm wrapped around Sheba while Bella was curled up behind her.

Day by day, she’d chipped away at my resolve until I woke up and realized that I loved her. I shouldn’t, but I did.

Bending over, I took off her shoes and set them aside.

“Off,” I whispered, and the dogs moved so I could fold back the blankets.

My eyes were locked on her sleeping face as I tucked her under the covers. Pain gripped my heart as I ran a piece of her soft hair through my fingers. For the first time since I was a child, I felt like crying. Caressing her cheek, I savored this fleeting moment.

Before I could pull away, Fawn grabbed my hand. She cuddled it as if it were one of the dogs. I held perfectly still and let the seconds tick by, but the longer I stayed, the harder it was going to be to let go forever. Gently prying my fingers from hers was like cutting my heart from my chest.

“I love you,” she mumbled groggily and then sighed in her sleep.

Brushing her temple with my lips, I whispered, “I love you too, Little Bird.”

Forcing myself to step back, I signaled to the dogs, and they happily jumped up to rejoin Fawn as I slipped out her door and closed it. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Marching down the hall, I changed into my workout clothes and then, at the last second, grabbed two bottles of whiskey to take with me. Why the fuck not?