Page 114 of Arranged Control
“You’re going to fix this,” I tell him, my hands shaking with rage. “From now on, you’re going to own what happened and you’re going to do everything you can to make it right.”
“What do you want from me?”
“Catch Molchanie.”
“Your mother.”
“No, she’s not my mother. She wasn’t the day she walked out on me. That’s something you never learned.”
He lets out a soft breath, his hands curling into tight fists, knuckles white. “I’ll do what I can.”
“You’ll do more than that, because now the Whelans really are going to know everything, and I can guarantee they’ll be pissed.”
He nods miserably. “That’s probably what I deserve.”
“It’s so much less.”
“I’ll do everything in my power to stop her.” I turn my back on him and stride to the door. But he calls out and makes me stop. “You remind me of her right now, you know. Darya back before she became what she is now.”
“Stop it,” I whisper, gritting my teeth.
“It’s true. You have her look. You have her poise and strength. My Darya was so smart and beautiful. She was the cleverest woman I’ve ever met.”
“Fuck you, Papa. I’m nothing like her.”
I leave the hospital room, shaking all over.
My mind is caught between Taras and my father. I can’t help but think that so much suffering could’ve been avoided if Papa had only told us everything he knew. And poor, stupid Taras: he rushed out to take on Molchanie all alone, probably because he hated her so much when he was young.
This is what my family did. They were both too proud and too stupid to communicate with everyone around them. Now Taras is nearly dead and Papa looks like he’s aging ten years every five minutes.
“Alina.”
I look up sharply. Seamus is leaning against the wall beside the door. He’s looking at me with pure sympathy in his eyes. I nearly walked right past him; I’m so caught up in my own misery.
He pulls me into his arms and hugs me tight. I let myself sink into his touch. I release one ugly sob and keep myself buried against his chest. I listen to his steady heart and the slow rhythm of his breath, and I think this is what family should be. A man who pulls me into his arms, not a man who pushes me away and treats me like I owe him something.
This is where I belong.
“What happened with the police?” I ask when I’m finally under control.
“Don’t worry about that. It’s more complicated than usual, but we’ll take care of it.”
“That’s good. I don’t want anyone to get in trouble.”
He squeezes me tighter. “I’m sorry, princess. I tried to get there as fast as I could. I tried to tell him to wait for backup, but he wouldn’t listen.”
“It isn’t your fault. Taras has always let his pride push him into making stupid decisions.”
“Still, I didn’t want this.”
“What about your family? Nobody’s hurt yet? Molchanie said she was going to strike.”
“So far they’re all fine. I’m hoping she’s rattled now that she doesn’t have her main safe house anymore.”
I lean back to look into his eyes. Seamus stares back and his attention is completely on me. Ever since all of this started, I’ve been his main priority. Even when we were barely more than strangers, he cared about me more than my own family did.
And ever since then, I’ve started to understand him. The way he acts like everything rolls off his back. How he pretends to bend with the wind. While really, he’s as anchored to his family as I’ve always been.
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