Page 92

I leave the dormitories with a thick coat pulled tightly over the tiny dress. The chill creeps underneath, caressing my bare legs. With every shift of hidden silk, I’m aware of how little I wear. Of the implications he sent with a few pieces of fabric and lace and a single short note.

I emerge into his closet, knocking softly on the door to his bedroom. Silence is my response. Cracking the door, I’d almost been hoping to catch him mid-dressing. But the room is empty. One of the side doors is invitingly ajar, and I step into a long sitting room that adjoins the dining room.

Kaelis is mid-movement as I enter, and he finishes setting out the silverware he was placing as I shut the heavy door behind me. The clicking of my heels fills the silence that, somehow, isn’t oppressive. There’s a familiar warmth to our solitude now, especially here.

“Did you do all this yourself?” I ask as I approach the chair opposite where Kaelis set out his place. For once, he’s not at the head of the table.

“I did.”

“Is Rewina taking the night off?”

“I gave it to her.” He crosses to me and holds out his hands for my coat. “I do hope what I told you to wear is underneath this.”

“Keep demanding things and I might not be inclined to give them to you.” I keep my arms folded, arching my brows.

Amusement rumbles up his chest. It makes my toes curl. Kaelis leans forward slightly, tilting his head, messy waves of dark hair shadowing his eyes. “I accept the challenge.”

My throat has gone dry, and it only gets worse as he slides the heavy velvet off my shoulders. I’m aware of how alone we are. My nipples perk to attention, and I know they’re visible through the silk. I intentionally wore nothing underneath…a fact that Kaelis seems to take a moment to appreciate.

“There is no light or shadow that doesn’t complement your form,” he murmurs softly, pulling out my seat. I take the hint and slip into it, the chair meeting the backs of my knees.

Kaelis serves both of us from dome-topped platters.

I suspect the kitchen didn’t get the night off as well.

The food is good, as always, but I only pick at it.

My focus is elsewhere. Like how his fingers close around the bottle of wine.

How sharp his eyes still are—parts of him that are abrasive and cutting—even when his smile can be so gentle.

“Are you ready for the Feast of Cups?” he asks.

“I think so. I’ll go to my crew tomorrow night to make sure everything is as it should be.” The Feast of Cups is the night after.

“Good.” We each take a long sip of wine, the implication of what the celebration will bring giving weight to the moment.

“Clara…if something goes wrong at the feast—”

“Don’t weep for an empty coffin,” I interrupt him.

He’s understandably confused. “What?”

“It’s something we—the club says. Don’t give in to despair until you know the coffin is full.

Yes, it applies to literal life-and-death situations.

But it is more than that. Don’t exhaust yourself over something that might not come to pass.

” I run my finger along the edge of the wineglass, eyes darting to him.

“Tonight, I don’t want to worry about what the day after tomorrow will bring.

I didn’t come here to plot, or plan. We’ve done all that.

And, frankly, if it’s not good enough by now, it never will be. ”

“Then what did you come here for?” His voice is heavy. He nearly consumes me with a look that makes my heart stutter.

“Don’t you know? After all, I wore the dress and nothing underneath.” I slowly uncross and recross my legs.

“I want to hear you say it.”

“So demanding.” My voice has dropped to little more than a whisper.

“You like me that way.” Kaelis rests his elbow on the table, chin on the back of his hand, leaning forward slightly. “Tell me, what did you come here for?”

Those eyes… I could spend forever being lost in them and thank him for the time.

“You.”

Kaelis stands, rounding the table. I shift myself and my chair to face him. Kaelis holds my stare, and the air is electrified. It’s not the wine that’s buzzing under our skin. His presence alone steals my senses.

He leans forward, his face stopping a breath from mine. I can feel the heat of his body. The warmth of his lips that begs to be met.

He’s so frustratingly, achingly attractive. Even when my mind says, Don’t do this. My senses abandon me. I want to be putty in his hands. Even though I fancy myself a logical, capable woman…sometimes I just want to be fucked by someone who’s very, very good at it.

“There is no world in which you do not consume my very being.” His voice is low and husky. My body clenches with anticipation.

This time, I wait for him to close the gap, and the immediate, skin-tingling sensation of his lips on mine nearly has me whimpering into his mouth. With a thumb, he presses gently on the side of my face. I open to him, and he readily deepens the kiss.

Kaelis straightens away, and I rise rather than breaking the kiss.

Shifting his body, he guides me over to the other half of the table without food or dishes.

Its surface meets my back, and I’m pinned between him and it.

Kaelis leans forward, hands gliding down my body, grabbing my ass underneath the dress and pulling me up.

I move to his whims and my own needs. Leaning back. Half seated on the table.

“You…you really do have nothing on underneath,” he rasps against my ear as his hands glide up the hem of the slip.

“I thought it’d be easier access.”

I tilt my head as an invitation. With a low growl in the back of his throat, Kaelis kisses down my neck. His hand slides all the way up my dress to grab my breast. He continues moving. The heat of his mouth draws a moan from me as his lips encircle my nipple over the silk.

His other hand glides along my left thigh. The world narrows onto my core as his fingers dance at the edges. Teasing me. Eliciting soft, short moans. I grip his shoulder as if in a silent plea, trying to convey the urgency for him to move. One finger slips in. Then another. I clutch him tighter.

His fingers move in and out of me at the same time as his thumb traces circles around my clit.

Waves of pleasure that border on euphoria shiver across my bare skin.

I tilt my head back with a gasp and Kaelis sucks, skillfully using his teeth, before he moves to the next breast. I want him to leave marks all over me.

I want him to go slow and be gentle and I want him to annihilate me.

“Come for me,” he demands with a growl, moving faster. The man knows—has learned so quickly exactly what to do. My insides clench, obeying him.

Kaelis once more has full control of my body.

Slow, timed movements have me shuddering uncontrollably but not yet over the edge.

He has me at a never-ending peak, and just when I’m about to push him away, he stops.

I inhale a deep gasp. As I’m finally about to catch my breath, he claims my mouth again and enters me, meeting no resistance.

A low moan rises in the back of his throat.

I hardly recall him opening his pants. There’s something mind-numbingly erotic about being fucked while he’s still completely dressed and I’m naked, save for a whisper of silk that’s pushed up over my chest. It’s primal. A bit filthy. And I fucking love it.

Already overly sensitive, every nerve in my body explodes as he sets an aggressive pace. My moans fill the air, echoing off every edge of the room. Never has the candlelight been so gorgeous than when it is gilding the edges of his face.

“You’re so fucking perfect. It’s infuriating,” he rasps, every word punctuated by a thrust or a kiss so hungry that it’s as if he’s trying to consume me whole.

His hand covers the bruises he left, wrapping around my throat for only a second.

The motion feels more dangerous than it ever was as his voice takes on an angry edge.

I grin wildly, nails digging into his shoulders as I hold on. I want to frustrate him. To drive him mad in every way possible with my existence.

Without warning, he pulls himself from me and steps back.

Without his counterbalance, I slide off the table and onto my feet.

Kaelis turns me, hands gripping my hips so hard they leave indents.

He pushes me down, and I brace myself against the tabletop.

Another moan escapes my mouth as he enters me again.

“Why…” he growls as he slams into me.

The question is never finished with words. But every slap of his hips against my ass asks everything that’s unsaid between us:

Why can I not stop thinking of you? Why do I want you so badly? Why does everything with you straddle the line of pleasure and pain? Why is it that it’s never enough?

I want to dissolve into him. My mind goes blank.

Every thought is hammered from it. There’s nothing but ecstasy.

Nothing but him and me and the line between us blurring.

Melting into each other until he releases himself into me.

The sound of his moan, cut short with a shuddering gasp, nearly sends me over the edge once more.

We’re left breathless in the aftermath. Sweetly aching and sweat-slicked.

Eventually, he pulls himself from me, and I push myself upright.

My muscles tremble, and I’m forced to lean against the table—half sitting on it once more—for support.

A weary and oh-so-satisfied smile eases its way onto my mouth.

But the bliss evaporates as I see my satisfaction isn’t quite shared.

Kaelis’s brow is furrowed. Eyes conflicted.

“What?” I ask. The look has alarm bells ringing.

He places his hands on either side of me, leaning in. His forehead presses against mine and his eyes close, as if he’s wincing. Desire has been replaced with desperation. With a need for more than the carnal.

“Stay with me tonight,” he whispers.

“What are you afraid of?” My hands glide up his chest to wrap around the back of his neck.