“Amusing how walking among your student body is considered ‘drastic.’?” I lean against the center of a table, two chairs flanking me.

Kaelis furrows his brow. “Why have you been avoiding me?”

“I haven’t been avoiding you.” Now my arms are folded as well.

He snorts loudly. “You are usually an exceptional liar. Which goes to say that you know that claim is ridiculous as well.”

I avoid his eyes, doubling down on my bad lies. “Things have been busy. I’ve been preparing for the Three of Swords Trials.” The excuse worked on Silas, maybe it’ll work on him…

“We both know that you have been preparing from the moment you got a hot meal and could train your body to recover from Halazar. You’ll be fine in the Three of Swords Trials.

Inking and wielding are second nature to you, and you only have to pass two of the three trials.

” His words are surprisingly warm, fond even.

Gentle enough that I can’t bring myself to look at him.

“It never hurts to be prepared,” I say defensively. “Which, speaking of, I should meet my friends to study and train.” I try to step around him, but Kaelis pushes off the door and blocks me.

“We both know what this is really about.”

“Do we?”

He looks down at me. “You blame me for her death.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” I look away. The mention of Arina rakes against a part of me that is still too fresh, too raw.

If only it were just her death clouding my thoughts when it came to him.

But Bristara’s words and warnings have stuck with me, too.

She had more to say that night, I know it, but I wasn’t ready to hear it.

Am I now? I’m not sure. Part of why I’ve yet to return.

“Is it, though?” Kaelis takes a step toward me.

“Of course I know it’s not your fault.” My hands drop to my sides, and I grip the table, fingers trembling.

Do you really believe him? I hear in Bristara’s voice.

I don’t know if what I say is for myself or for him.

It’s all too murky still. But I know I might completely snap for good if he keeps bringing her up.

“I know how she got there—she even told me herself she was pushing deeper into the academy, that she had ‘something big.’ She was the one who went there and took the risk.”

Arina was a woman who made her own choices. Bristara’s words, true or not, are of no comfort to me, no matter how many times I repeat them.

“She must’ve been miraculous to have made it even that far.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” My eyes swing back to his, and something in them makes Kaelis flinch.

“No.” His tone relays that he knows how ridiculous that’d be. “Even with all that being true, I know…I am a part of the world— this world —that pushed her to her death.”

I wonder if he managed to eavesdrop on Bristara’s and my conversation.

“That’s why I want to build a new world—a better one. I want to make things better for all those like Arina, like you and your Starcrossed Club,” he continues, oblivious to my suspicions.

“Is Arina alive in your new world?” I whisper.

“Clara…”

I silence him with a ferocious glare. With all the hurt and pain I’ve carried for weeks. “Will you bring her back?”

“The world I want to build is bigger than the people we’ve lost.”

“Nothing is bigger than them.”

“There are countless others like you.” His tone is torn between frustration and understanding. “We will have one wish. You cannot sacrifice the good of countless others for your own benefit.”

“Of course you don’t understand. It’s not as if you have close family or friends,” I mutter.

Kaelis doesn’t flinch. Instead, emotion drains from him, as if he’s retreating within himself for safety. I focus on the corner of the room rather than bringing myself to look at him.

When he speaks next, it’s with forced calmness. “The World has the power to change everything, for everyone.”

My chin jerks toward him. I meet his eyes with a silent challenge. “Then change it for me—bring them back.”

“I can’t.”

“Then what good is it?” I snap. “Why have that power if we can’t save the people we love?”

“Because the wish is complicated.”

“It doesn’t have to be!” Don’t make me your enemy again, part of me begs. Give me a reason to trust you, forever.

“I know a lot more about this than you.” Even though it’s clear he tries to sound otherwise with his tone, he comes off as if he’s speaking down to me.

Kaelis continues hastily before my offense can grow.

“The World gives one wish. You have one chance to speak your will, only one command. The more complicated it is, the less likely the outcome you hope for. Too vague and you run into the same problem. We must be perfect . Then, the deck is shuffled once more. Everything changes—including who the Majors are.”

“I could lose my power?” I whisper, not realizing until this second how much I have come to appreciate it. Even if I’ve yet to use my Major again since Eza, there are so many other benefits to being the Wheel of Fortune.

“Nothing is guaranteed when everything is remade from the ground up,” he says solemnly.

“You might keep it, you might not. I might not be an Arcanist at all. It all depends on how the wish is phrased and how the World interprets it. Which is why I must be as careful as possible in crafting the wording, focusing on what will do the most good.”

I. Not we. His wish. His world.

Maybe he’s right; it probably is better to focus on the greatest good for the greatest number of people. More noble, at least. And who would’ve thought I would say that about Kaelis, ever?

But what has the “greatest good” ever given to me? I grip the table tighter and relax my fingers. This world, the next…it’s not worth it without the people I love. Maybe I’m the horrible one between us now. This world has made me selfish and cruel.

“Kaelis, you don’t have to convince me any more than you already have,” I concede to keep the conversation moving—to avoid his suspicion.

“I know we need to work. I know that the Three of Swords Trials are coming up and then it’s merely seventy-five days until the Feast of Cups, where I must not only have my forgeries but also figure out how to get the cards from your father.

” The weight of it all, in this moment, is nearly crushing.

“But my hands won’t move. I’ve inked precious few cards as it is. ”

“Let me help you.” He takes another step closer.

“I don’t need help; I’ve lost people before and know this process,” I say softly. “But it never gets easier. So let me ride the wave and I will find you when it passes. It will pass.”

“I also know the ocean you’re adrift in.” The words seem almost painful for him to speak as he closes the gap between us. “I know these currents.”

“How?” I don’t think Kaelis would lie about something like this, not right now. But Bristara’s cautions are stuck in my mind like barbs.

“My mother.”

“The queen?” I’ve heard mention of her only as a reclusive individual—one who keeps mostly to her castle, doting on the youngest prince.

“ Not the queen,” he all but snarls. “That woman is not my mother.” I blink at the revelation. I’ve never heard any mention of Kaelis being born of a union from anyone but the king and queen. The portrait I found flashes in my mind. “My father killed my blood mother.”

“Kaelis…” I can’t form any word but his name. Shock gives way to the dull ache of a sympathy I never expected to give him. And a shared understanding I never would have guessed I’d find with him: the pain of losing one’s mother.

It’s happened yet again: Just when I think I’m ready to hate him and pull away for good…he draws me back in. He does something I’m not expecting, and suddenly I’m not sure which way is up anymore. My heart is in knots.

Kaelis pulls out a chair, but rather than sit in it, he uses the space to lean on the table next to me.

“I’ve spent my life as a prisoner in my own home.

I spent my childhood enduring the madness of memories that carried no explanation—of a woman’s smile in unfamiliar halls.

I was told that the woman who I knew in my blood was my real mother did not exist. I’ve suffered a lifetime of knowing that I am only alive because of the power my father thinks I wield. ”

“That you can wield reversed cards?” I clarify.

“Exactly.” Kaelis laughs darkly. “If I could, don’t you think I would truly be a force to be reckoned with, and my father wouldn’t be able to push me around?

But, as it is, I am nothing more than a blade he can hold to the throats of those he hates.

Sharp enough to be deadly to others, but not strong enough to be a threat to him.

“In his cruelty, he’s had me kill and sacrifice. He took from me the only person who would have stood up for me—my mother. Every day, I’ve had to endure his brutality. Had to look into the eyes of the man who would end me if it wouldn’t be inconvenient for him to do so.”

“Did you really destroy Clan Hermit?” The question is little more than a whisper.

The stories tell of a night when the clan was gathered—a night when a magic poison was introduced to the High Lord and through him flowed to everyone related to him by blood and by name, near andfar.

A magic so powerful and wicked that it even rotted the very ground the clan stood upon, causing the Archives of the Hermit to collapse into the earth.

“Clara.” My name is a caution.

“Was it on your father’s orders, as they say? Were they really plotting against the crown?”

“Clara.” He pushes away from the table, shifting to face me.

“Will you use the World to bring them back?” I demand to know. “Will you bring back your mother?”

A shadow passes over his pained and haunted expression. The anger that the mere mention of Clan Hermit elicits simmers at the edges of his eyes. Kaelis draws a slow breath and exhales. “No.”

“You…” I don’t even have words. To have all that power and not seek to right those wrongs.

His throat tightens as he swallows hard.

He forces himself to repeat, “No. I’m focused on the future, Clara, not the past. Oricalis destroyed my home, so I will destroy it.

I’ll dismantle everything, so that way there is an opportunity to begin anew and make something good.

A world where King Naethor will never hurt anyone ever again. ”

The room goes still, the air heavy. For the first time since I’ve known him, I wonder if I’m seeing the real prince behind it all, behind the stories and the reputation. If I’m seeing the hidden hurt that defines everything about him, his goals, and the world he’s trying to build.

However mistaken I still believe him to be.

“I’m sorry,” I murmur, unsure of what else to say. “For your mother.”

“I’m sorry, too. For everything you gave up—I gave up…for all ofit.”

I search his face and cannot find the hint of a lie. He means it. Which…makes it worse that I still don’t think I can forgive him for not being willing to bring them back.

My hand grips his, and I clutch his fingers tightly. “We’re going to do it. We will get the World. We’ll remake it all.”

“Thank you,” Kaelis whispers.

He means it…And that will make it all the harder for me to deceive him. His world means nothing to me if the people I love aren’t in it.