Page 67

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I give her an incredulous look before going to my wardrobe and grabbing my satchel. The staff can take my clothes—they’re not really mine anyway. Most of what’s precious to me is in the desk.

“I saw it.” She stops all movement. “You destroyed my card before it could reverse.”

I hum, really not wanting to deal with this right now. “I think I used two Aces and the Five of Coins.”

“Do you think me stupid? I know what Coins magic looks like. I know the cadence of the cards.” Alor’s proper veneer is cracking. “And the Five, even combined with an Ace or two, isn’t nearly strong enough to do what you did.”

“I think you’ve had a long day. Which…sorry about your hand,” I say gently and continue putting things from my desk into my satchel—though I remain poised to summon a card from the deck at my thigh. “It’s easy to get—”

“Don’t insult me!” The weapon quivers in her grip. Cards are scattered on the bed next to her. The woman is armed and ready. “I saw it. Just like I’ve tracked every night you have sneaked from this room.”

“I didn’t know I had a curfew,” I say dryly.

“Tell me where you’re going. Is it some kind of secret training? How can you do all that you’re able to do?” she demands again.

“I didn’t know you cared so much about me.” I unlock the drawer of my desk and try to shove the very cards in question into my satchel without her noticing.

“I didn’t, until you decided to involve yourself in my business.”

“Is this because of the tokens?” She and Eza had made it clear the Swords spots were theirs. And since that’s the only house I can now bid for…we’re in direct contest. Three of us for two slots.

“It’s because you clearly have some kind of advantage.” She’s now outright pointing the dagger at me. The only reason I haven’t drawn a card is she has yet to leave her bed. “Is it because of the prince you can use more advanced magics? Did he take you back to the Chalice in secret?”

“I’d expect a noble of all people to know that the Chalice isn’t the only way to access greater powers. It is difficult but possible to train oneself. Some Arcanists are simply more innately gifted—like how some can naturally run faster or jump higher.” I keep my tone level.

She clearly takes it as me speaking down to her because a flush darkens her cheeks. “I know how magic works. I know Arcanists made the pilgrimage to the Chalice before this place was even a notion in Kaelis’s mind.”

“Good, then you know that some Arcanists never needed the Chalice at all. Glad we could have this talk.” I know what the nobles are taught, what they believe.

And it’s hard not to, with the crown’s laws stifling the natural growth of Arcanists and because the Chalice does work to expand an Arcanist’s powers.

“How dare you—”

I sigh heavily, interrupting her. “Maybe I’m one of those extremely gifted Arcanists and I became the prince’s consort because I’m that good.”

With a snarl she stabs the dagger into her desk. It stands perfectly upright. Her eyes are ablaze, her forced nonchalance abandoned.

“Damn you, tell me how you do it!”

“There’s really no trick, Alor. I can just use the cards I use. Despite what you’ve been told your whole life, there isn’t just one way to use tarot, or gain its powers.”

For a moment, she deflates. But then anger and disbelief win out.

“No.” Alor is on her feet. “No. I counted all the cards you used today. Others might have lost it in the chaos, but I didn’t.

I’ve watched you before then, even. Not even my sister can wield as many cards as you can in a single day.

Not even the best of the third years the academy has ever seen.

” She thrusts a finger in my face, and only the fact that it’s not the dagger keeps her alive.

But she’s really testing my nerves. “There’s something you’re not telling me.

You have secrets you’re keeping from everyone. ”

I open my mouth, but this isn’t about what I have to say, not any longer.

“And then you give one of your tokens to Luren, of all people.”

Defensiveness for my friend rises within me. “What I do with my resources, awards, and talents is none of your business.”

“Is that so?” Her lips curl into an almost sardonic smile. “It is my business when you so clearly want to make me your enemy.”

“I don’t care about you!” I whirl on her, the exhaustion of the day finally snapping something in me.

Alor seems stunned, and her shocked expression is worth repeating it again, just to make the words linger.

“I. Don’t. Care. About. You. I have so many other things that areso much more important than this petty academy and its stupid houses and tokens and tests. ”

“Take that back,” she whispers.

“What?” What, there, out of everything, turned her rage to a frozenfury?

“Take it back!” Alor lunges for me. I dodge, but she expected me to and hooks my arm. We fall, landing hard.

Tumbling, I roll on top of her, pinning her down before she can strike me. “What in the Twenty is wrong with you tonight?”

The only thing stopping me from doing more—doing worse—is that if she wanted to really attack me, she would’ve. She could’ve grabbed her dagger. Could’ve cast a card. Still could. But she didn’t…hasn’t.

This isn’t about me.

“This school is the only thing that matters,” she almost shouts.

“Why?”

“Because it’s the only way he’s going to ever look my way.”

“ He? ” I ease away. Even though her chest is heaving with ragged breaths and barely contained rage, I don’t think she’s going to lunge again. She’s turning this pain back inward. “Eza?” I certainly hope it’s not Kaelis she’s pining for.

She barks laughter and sits as I slide off to the side. “Twenty, no. Eza is a means to an end. I promised him I’d help him get into House Swords in exchange for information.”

“What kind of information?”

“It’s personal.” She draws her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them.

“Who is ‘he,’ then? Or is that ‘personal,’ too?”

“It is, but…” A sigh. She mutters a string of foul words under her breath that ultimately end in “My father. His attention has always been elsewhere. On people and things better than me—more important. My whole life, he’s been gone.

” I know how that feels…“ And when he’s there, he might as well be a world away. ”

“Emilia’s his favorite?” I venture, thinking of the man in plate leading the group of Clan Tower knights earlier today that Emilia joined. I didn’t pay him too much mind in the chaos.

“Between her and me? Yes. But his true favorite is his duty. The secret agendas given to him by the king. Long missions and longer times away. There are always so many people and places vying for his attention that I’ve never been able to live up to.

” She looks away as her voice grows soft.

“When Emilia began doing well here—when she became the King of Swords—it was as if she finally became worthy in his eyes.

Every time she came home, he would talk with her about all his plans in his study.

She was finally taken beyond his wall of silence.

“And I don’t resent my sister for it,” she adds hastily. Her panic at that possible misconception betrays her sincerity. “I’m happy she has his love and attention. She deserves it. I just want it, too. I want to earnit.”

“But you know you’ll be accepted into House Swords. Your sister has made that clear. As soon as the year is over, you’ll return home triumphant.”

“From what he saw in my showing today, nothing about me is triumphant.” She wears a bitter smile underneath tired eyes. “And if you get into House Swords, too, you will become King in our third year. Not me.”

I can’t even argue. If it’s a competition between us, I know I’d win. But I have an unfair advantage, I want to say. I want to tell her she’s right. It’s the secrecy of the Majors and my mission that keeps me silent.

Sympathy blooms in my chest. I piece together that, maybe, this was the source of her coldness toward me from the beginning.

She probably heard from Emilia about my performance in the Arcanum Chalice.

I can almost hear myself being described as “a natural” or “a gem in the rough.” And now that she caught me using a Ten card…

“All right,” I relent. “I’ll help you as best I can.” How did I end up being the one to make sure all these other initiates do well?

“What?” Her gaze had drifted out the window, but now it’s back solely on me.

“I’ll try to teach you what I can about inking and wielding—what I know beyond what they’re teaching in classes. Don’t ask me for a reading, though, I’m genuinely mediocre there.”

“Can you do that? I thought you said it was innate talent.”

“Talent is having your starting line placed closer to the finish. Sure, those with it get to the goal faster. But with hard work and diligence, you can cover the same distance. Even without the Chalice’s rituals,” I reassure her.

I know the notion is oversimplified at best, and a bit naive to how the world works.

But sometimes, we need reckless optimism to survive.

It’s what I always told Arina. And she shined.

Every hope I would’ve ever held for my sister—the wishes I feel like I carried from before I could even say her name—came true.

Maybe they’ll come true for Alor, too.

“You’d really do that? For me?” Her skepticism is understandable. This is the first time we’ve really talked to each other meaningfully, and I’m offering to help her in a major way.

“Yes,” I say, as much to myself as to her.

“Why? I haven’t exactly been nice to you.”

“You haven’t been that bad.” Especially now that I know she and Eza aren’t actually cozy.

Thank goodness. Now that I’m looking back on all our interactions with a new lens, I realize that I’d been assuming a lot.

“I know the importance of family. It’s basically the only thing worth fighting for in this messed-up world. ”