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I slowly made my way up the hill, which was harder than it looked, especially on these bloody crutches. I looked towards the familiar house, one that I’d spoken about buying many years ago.

Ten years ago…

“What kind of house would you want?” I asked Emily as she sat beside me in the library.

“Something I could do up and make how I want, you know?” She turned to face me, her smile reaching her eyes. “That house up on the hill would be an absolute dream.”

“But it’s practically falling apart,” I joked, turning the page in my science book. The same one I was supposed to be reading but couldn’t focus on.

“Precisely. That’s what I want.”

I never knew how much a house could mean to someone, but seeing Emily’s eyes light up when she spoke about what she’d do to it warmed my heart.

“Where would the pool go?” I teased.

“There wouldn’t be a pool, just a beautiful garden full of flowers.”

“Sounds like the perfect peaceful place.” My hand brushed hers as she grabbed her pencil.

“What’s going on here?” Harry interrupted the moment, his figure appearing next to the table Emily and I sat at. Mike tailed him, coming up next to him as his gaze bounced between Emily and me.

“Nothing. I was studying for my science exam when I saw your sister, so we decided to keep each other company.”

“Hmm, alright.” I didn’t know if Harry believed anything that came out of my mouth when it came to Emily but fuck it.

“Beckett, we need to get to practice.” Mike smiled, but it was directed towards Emily.

“Alright, coming.” I shoved my books into my bag before facing Em and saying, “I love the idea.”

Harry raised a brow. “What idea?”

“Don’t you have practice to get to?” Emily scoffed as she turned her attention back to her English notes and gave her brother the cold shoulder.

Harry cleared his throat but then covered it up with a laugh, clearly not wanting to push her further. “We’ll see you after practice at the car.”

I smiled softly, playfully rolling my eyes at Harry, as Emily peeked up at me between her dark lashes.

Present day…

It may have been her dream once, but as time passed it was ours. There were days we’d sneak up here and talk about what we’d do to the property. But now it was occupied, and it looked the complete opposite of what we’d planned. Flowers adorned the front garden, an array of brightly coloured petals front and centre. Something I knew Emily would have approved of. It had a certain homey feel to it, making me think how I used to dream of something like this with the girl I loved.

I approached the door and knocked , waiting for someone to answer. When no one did, I knocked louder.

A woman’s voice sang from the other side of the door. “Coming!, One second.”

I took a second to view my surroundings and the one thing I couldn’t help but notice was the porch swing that hung beside the door. Something Emily used to express how much she’d love one.

The second the door swung open, all the air left my lungs.

Emily.

There she stood after nearly nine years on the threshold of what we dreamed would become our family home. Her auburn hair was bundled up on top of her head, dark rimmed glasses framed her emerald eyes, and remnants of icing sugar dusted her cheeks.

“Emily?” the words tumbled out of my mouth, barely a whisper, as if they’d been lodged somewhere deep in my chest for the past nine years and had finally found their way to the surface. But the shock of seeing her again, the rush of recognition, the overwhelming swirl of emotions left me stumbling for air, my heart thumping too loud in my ears.

I wasn’t ready for this. Hell, I hadn’t even known I could be ready for this.

“Hi.” Her response was distant and the complete opposite of the sweet, loving one she once had.

“Sorry, I must have the wrong house. I’m actually looking for the home of one of the kids on the team.”

“No, you got the right one.” She breathed.

“Wait… You’re Liam’s mum?” I almost choked on my own words, my face a picture of shock and confusion.

“Yes, Beckett. He’s my son. I’m his mum. He’s not here. Now, please go if you have nothing else to say.” Wow… I was Beckett to her again. The last time she called me that was when we first met. Before we got to know each other. After that, I was always Beck to her.

I had nothing else to say, or I did, but I couldn’t find the damn words. I stood there frozen and silent, amazed that the woman I loved was standing right in front of me.

She didn’t say another word. She just shut the door on my face.

Ten years ago…

“So, how many kids can we fill this house with?” I asked, a smile playing on my lips.

“Kids?!” Her mouth dropped open as she briefly looked back at me.

“Mhm, I want a whole football team.” I wrapped my arms around her waist from behind. I couldn’t hide my grin.

“I can hear you smiling.” She jabbed my ribs with her elbow, but I only tightened my hold on her.

“What, you wouldn’t want a whole football team with me?” I chuckled.

“I would. I want a whole life with you,”she murmured as she spun around to face me, her eyes shining with adoration. Something I only saw when she was looking at me.

“Then I plan to build that life for you.” Craning my neck, I kissed the tip of her nose. “I plan to create our family in that house.”

Present day…

I knew this was wrong. I knew I shouldn’t have been in the football club’s office with the tablet in my hand. I knew it, but I had no other choice. I needed something solid to go off of. Something I knew she wouldn’t be able to deny.

I found Liam’s registration details on the tablet. My finger trembled over his name: Liam Ryton.

Fuck it.

I clicked the screen, and there it was—his information.

Name: Liam George Ryton

Age: Seven years old

Date of birth: 22nd April 2017

Mother: Emily Elizabeth Ryton

Address: 1 Ullswater Hill

Team: Richmond Sharks U8s

Coach: Daniel James Hanson

I must have reread his birthday a thousand times. Going over the dates one hundred times in my head.

“What are you doing on the tablet, Beckett?” Daniel appeared at the door, startling me.

“Did you know?” I asked.

“Know what?” His brows furrowed in confusion.

“Nothing. I need to go.” My voice shook, and then, like a punch to the gut, it hit me.

Liam was my son.

The revelation crashed into me like a tidal wave. The sheer force of it left me unable to move, unable to breathe, unable to comprehend the weight of my thoughts.

I grabbed my crutches and hobbled as fast as I could to leave the office as the walls felt as though they were closing in on me, making it hard to breathe.

“Where are you going?” He gripped my arm, trying to stop me as if he already knew.

“To get the answers I need.” I snatched my arm away, not even bothering to call a taxi. I couldn’t wait any fucking longer.

I wanted answers, and I intended to get them.

Knocking on the door for a second time today, I let out a steady breath, trying to calm myself down before Emily answered.

When the door opened, I was taken aback to see Liam. The smile he wore was now replaced with a scowl.

“You again?” He groaned.

The more I observed, the more I noticed the striking similarities between us. His hair, tousled and wild just like mine used to be, framed his face perfectly. The shape of his nose mirrored my own. It was almost eerie how he looked like a carbon copy of me as a child. The only difference was his eyes. They were Emily’s through and through. How hadn’t I noticed before?

“Hello?” He waved his arm in front of my face, pulling me out of my thoughts. “What do you want?”

“I just want to chat, that’s all.” I smiled.

“About?” He asked, crossing his arms across his chest defensively.

“Did you know I went to school with your mum and uncle?”

“Am I supposed to care?” He scoffed.

“I just want to help you, that’s all.”

“Liam! What did I tell you about opening the door!” Emily suddenly appeared behind him, the panic vanishing when she saw it was me.

“Sorry, Mummy.” He turned to face her with an apologetic smile. “Beckett said he wants to help me.” There was a hint of attitude hidden in that sentence. Probably because his mother was present.

“Oh, he did, did he?” She glanced at me.

“Listen, I want you to play tomorrow. Your team needs you, and you’re one of the best players I’ve seen.”

“And for that I need to say sorry, right?” He rolled his eyes, directing his attitude at me. Apparently, it was back.

“Ideally, yes. Otherwise, Coach could bench you for a lot longer than one match, and I know nobody wants that.” I looked at him for a second longer than I should have, especially after seeing his information at the club. I couldn’t stop wondering if this little boy was truly mine.

He laughed, folding his arms across his chest. “No, thanks.”

“Look, mate?—”

“I’m not your mate,” he snapped, his eyes narrowing slightly.

“No, I know that but I just want to help.” I sighed, hoping to get through to him.

“I don’t need your help.”

“Liam,” Emily captured his attention, crouching on the balls of her feet to look him in the eye, “you love football more than anything else in the world.”

“I love you more than football, Mummy.” He smiled, his eyes glistening with love for her.

“Just as I love you, but I know for a fact this attitude isn’t you, so I am asking as your mummy for you to apologise to Mr. Ashmore so I can stand on the sidelines tomorrow and cheer on my boy.” She cupped his cheek as his face lit up like a Christmas tree. I couldn’t lie. Hearing her call me Mr. Ashmore struck a nerve. It was as if we were strangers.

He took a deep breath before turning to face me, his eyes softening with every passing second “I’m sorry for my attitude.”

“Okay, apology accepted.” I nodded. “I will speak to Coach and see you at ten thirty tomorrow for the warm up.”

He nodded his head once before turning away and running up the stairs that I could see from my stance at the door. When Emily started to close the door, my shoe darted out to stop it. She wasn’t even trying to hide the fact that she wanted me gone.

“Wait, Em, can we talk?”

“No, we can’t,” she breathed out, unable to look at me.

“Em—”

“Not now, Beckett. My son is here, and I don’t want him to witness whatever it is you have to say.”

For the second time in one day, the door was closed on my face. But not before I saw the hurt on hers.

Fuck!

Hours ticked by, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to leave. I didn’t know why but I sat on the bench on the decking beside her front door.

What the fuck am I supposed to do?!

I pulled out my phone, dialling Daniel’s number.

“You alright, mate?”

“Liam is playing tomorrow.” I breathed out, still trying to work out what was going on in my head.

“Well, shit, he apologised?”

“He did. It was mainly for his mum, though, but we’ll take the wins where we can.” A small smile played on my lips.

“Ah, Emily. He’d do anything for her.” I could hear Daniel mirroring my smile over the phone.

“I could see that. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know so it wasn't a surprise in the morning.”

“Cheers, mate. Wait, where are you?” He asked.

“Just out.” Looking towards Emily’s front door, my heart tightened.

“Do you need a ride home?” He offered. “I can drive to where you are and get you.”

“No, I’m good. I’ll see you in the morning.” I jabbed the end call button, not wanting him to insist. I just needed this time to think about my next move.

After another hour of sitting in the cold, I heard the front door open as Emily stepped outside, not noticing me for the first few seconds. I breathed in her familiar scent, every memory and emotion we shared flooding back in. They hung suspended in the air between us.

“Em?” I whispered, catching her off guard.

“When did you get back?” She questioned, her brows furrowing as she spoke.

“I never left. I-I couldn’t.”

I stood, towering over her as I had always done while I leaned on my crutches for support.

I couldn’t tell if she was pissed off with me, but right then, I didn’t care. She’d already shut me out twice, and I wasn’t going to let it happen again.

“Beckett, Liam has only just gone to sleep.” Her words were short and to the point, sounding irritated over the fact that I was still there. She glanced over her shoulder towards the closed door.

“But he’s asleep, so that means we can talk?”

She sighed. “What’s there to talk about?”

“I want answers, Em.” I ran my hand through my hair, unsure of where this conversation was going or if, in fact, it would go anywhere. “I fucking need them.”

Her slender fingers tightened on the door handle before pushing it open just enough to invite me inside.

She led me through to the kitchen. It was as I imagined it would be. All warm tones and baking equipment. The dim lighting casted long shadows across the countertops. The light had a golden glow, almost amber, as it touched the edges of everything from the worn oak cabinets to her ‘best mummy’ mug sitting by the sink.

I glanced over at the fridge, seeing Liam’s life in all its vibrant chaos being held together with magnets. A few certificates stared back at me: MVP of the Junior Football League, Player of the Year, Champion of the Year Three Math Olympics. The awards were as endless as the photos. One of Liam and Emily caught my eye. He was holding up a pumpkin they’d carved together. Emily looked happy, her smile wider than ever as she wrapped her arms around our son.

It’s all there. Baking, football, and family. It’s everything we planned together, only I wasn’t a part of it.

“So, what is it that you think you need answers to?” Her voice warmed and all that remained was an eerie calmness that settled over me.

“Liam.”

“I don’t know what you need to know regarding him.” She folded her arms across her chest before leaning against the kitchen door frame. “To be quite frank, he’s none of your business.”

That’s what she said, but it didn’t feel right. It felt like it was my business to know what Liam was up to.

Fuck it, just come out and say it.

“Is he mine, Em?” I whispered, the words slipping out like a confession I wasn’t ready to make. My stomach clenched, a cold, uneasy feeling curling inside me like a fist tightening around my insides. It was the kind of discomfort you got when you were waiting for something you couldn’t control, the sharp edge of anticipation cutting through every thought. I felt dizzy, light-headed, as if the ground beneath me might give way at any moment and I wouldn’t even see it coming.

My chest was tight, like I couldn’t quite get enough air. The silence between us stretched out, heavy and thick, wrapping around me like a suffocating fog.

The seconds morphed into what felt like fucking hours as I stood there with my heart in my hands.

“What makes you ask that?”

“I saw his birthday, Em, the dates add up, so unless you were with someone else when we were together, before I left, he has to be mine.”

“You’ve got some nerve to even suggest something like that!” Her calmness was replaced with irritation as she spoke through gritted teeth.

“Me? I’m the one who’s got some nerve?! How did you work that one out?”

“Because you come around here acting as though you’re clueless. Was that your plan?” She demanded.

“Well, actually, I’m not actually acting clueless, I just want to know if Liam is my son.”

“You know he is!” She spat, and in that moment, the rug that had always been securely underneath me was ripped away. My chest pinched, and I couldn’t breathe.

I lowered myself onto the stool at the breakfast bar, her eyes still burning holes into me.

“Why are you acting innocent? You already knew we were having a child. You didn’t want to fucking know, Beckett! You tossed us aside like we were nothing to you.”

I was taken aback at her words. She never told me, not even over voicemail. “I didn’t fucking know! If I did, do you really think I’d let you do it all alone?!”

“It’s easy to stand there and claim you never knew, but how am I supposed to believe that?” She whispered.

“Because I’m telling you the truth!”

“After everything you did, trust is the last thing that exists between us?” She threw her arms up in disbelief.

“Because you know me. You were the only one that ever truly did!” I sighed.

A stray tear rolled down her cheek, and my heart straight up broke into a million pieces.

“I want you to leave, Beckett.” I reached out to her, but for the first time, she backed away. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her as tears collected in her beautiful eyes.

“We need to talk about this,” I told her.

“I can’t talk about this anymore. Not tonight.” She walked into the hall as I followed her. She held the front door open for me. “I don’t know how you expect me to believe you after everything.”

“Em—” My voice was nothing more than a whisper.

“Please just go, Beckett,” she pleaded, fighting back the sob that I knew she wanted to let out.

As much as I hated the idea of leaving her alone, I respected what she was asking of me.

“I’m not giving up on this, just know that.” I promised.

I turned back to face her after I walked through the threshold. The familiar click of the shutting door graced my ears when all I wanted was to see her face one last time.

I had a son.

Why did nobody tell me? Why did my parents not tell me?!

Why did everyone in my life lie to me?!