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I decided to walk to collect Liam. I had time to kill and it took double the time to get there than it normally would have. And with the extra time on my hands came a lot of unwanted memories.

Almost nine years ago…

As I continued to search for my phone to try to call Em, my attention was captured by Mike as he wandered into the apartment I’d been put up in for my first season. He had a look on his face that I couldn’t quite work out. Well, at least until he opened his mouth.

“Mate, I have something to tell you.”

“What is it?”

“It’s Emily.” He sighed.

“What about Em? Is she alright?” I stood toe to toe with him, wondering what the fuck was going on.

“This is going to hurt you, mate, and I’m sorry that I’m the one that has to tell you but…”

“Just fucking spit it out,” I ordered, fisting his shirt.

“She met someone else.”

I released my grip, stumbling back slightly as if I’d just taken a blow to the chest. “What the fuck do you mean she’s met someone else?”

“She met someone else. I don’t know how else to spell it out for you.”

“She wouldn’t do that to me.” I knew my Em… Or at least I thought I did.

“I’m just telling you what she told me.”

“But why the hell would she tell you and not me directly?” I was livid. My heart damn near broke into a million pieces. “Help me find my damn phone to call her!”

“There’s no point. She said she doesn’t want you anymore, Beck. That she found someone else who doesn’t put the game before her like you did.”

Did I put the game before her? Is that how she truly felt?

“Besides, you moving away forced her to move on. She knew it wouldn’t work.” He frowned.

“It wasn’t like that with us. She isn’t like that!” I bellowed.

“Of course she is. She knows how fucking hot she is. You were just a toy to her. That sweetness and light is just an act, an act that you fell for.”

“Don’t… Don’t fucking speak about her like that!”

“Why not? It’s the truth, mate.” He rolled his eyes. “Look, just forget her. Look where you are. Look at who you are. You can find another woman like her in a heartbeat.”

But that was the thing. The organ in my chest wasn't pulsing out beats. Not since she broke it. .

I didn’t want anyone else. I wanted Emily.

Over the next few days, I called her more times than usual but all I got was her voicemail. I had to accept it was over, and that the girl didn’t want me anymore. That’s what cut the most.

Present day…

My parents confirmed it. They said she’d moved on, and that it was in my best interest to focus on my career and not someone like Emily. They never gave me a reason to doubt them before, so of course I believed them. And now, I saw it all for what it was, one big fucking game to Mike.

Those shitty memories faded the second I neared the house and saw Em and Liam waiting at the bottom of the hill. She held up her hand, waving in my direction.

“Hey, mate.” I smiled at Liam. “You joining us, Em?”

“Not today. I thought I’d bring him down here to wait rather than you struggling up the hill.”

I would have struggled a million times over if it meant I got to see them.

“Alright, well, we’ll come back straight after. Unless we can go for a burger?”

“Oh, can I, Mum?” Liam pleaded, giving her that puppy dog look. One he probably knew worked all too well.

“Alright.” She looked up at me and smiled. One that I remembered every single time I closed my eyes over the years we were apart. “On one condition.”

“Name it.” Liam responded.

“Bring me something back.”

“Of course.” I stepped closer to her as Liam practised his tricks with the ball.

“I’ll have—” she started to say.

“I remember what you like, Em.” I was close enough that I got hints of sweet vanilla cookies wrapped around the floral hues of her perfume. “Unless that’s changed?”

“N-no, it hasn’t.” She averted her eyes and let out a breath, small puffs of cold air leaving her perfectly shaped lips.

“Beckett, can we go already?” Liam called to me, breaking the connection that was trying to come back to life between Em and me.

“Yeah, one second, mate.”

I inched closer to Emily after checking Liam was still preoccupied, bringing my hand up towards her face.

“Beckett, what are you doing?” she questioned, hesitancy clear in her voice. She didn’t back away, though.

“You’ve got a little icing sugar right here.” I brushed the apple of her cheek with the pad of my thumb before bringing it to my mouth. “It always did taste better this way.” I couldn't help myself. And even if I could, would I want to?

No, no I wouldn’t.

“We’ll see you when we get back.” I looked over at Liam, who was still enjoying himself and kicking his ball around. “Ready when you are,” I called towards him.

“About time. It’s freezing.” He demonstrated just how cold he was by breathing like a dragon, his breath as clear as day in the early light of dawn. I looked back at Emily as we started to walk away, but she was trying her best to look anywhere else.

Call it cliché but I was like a moth to a flame when it came to her.

Always was.

Always would be.

I must have been getting a better handle on my crutches because we arrived at training earlier than anticipated.

“Do you want to chat for a bit or go and get warmed up?” I asked Liam, who seemed to be torn on what to do.

“I’ll chill for a bit. we’re mega early.” He laughed, flopping himself down onto the supporter’s chairs. “What’s it like?”

“What’s what like?”

“Being a footballer—what’s it like?”

“Honestly, the football part is the best. I love being on the pitch.” I beamed, giving him a smile but then a pang of disappointment sliced through me. My injury had become a constant thought and reminder as to why I wasn't playing the game.

“Do you think you’ll go back to Spain soon?” Liam asked.

“Yeah, kind of have to, mate. I’m contracted to them.” His face fell ever so slightly. “I just came home to have some time away and recover before heading back to the team for my medical in a few weeks.”

“A few weeks?!” He gasped.

“Yeah, I’m going to spend a little more time with Daniel and you guys first, but after that I need to go back.”

“Right… I’d better warm up.” He grabbed his ball and stomped off towards the pitch, not letting me get another word in. It was like the progress we’d made so far shot out into the distance, and I could barely see it.

“You two seem to be getting on better,” Daniel pointed out as he sat down beside me.

“Yeah, we are.” I sighed before looking over at Dan.

“How are you feeling about being a dad now?” He asked.

“Great. Pissed that I missed seven years of his life, but I have Mike to thank for that, the fucking prick.” I seethed as quietly as possible.

“Mike?”

“It’s a long story. Just know he messed with Emily and me. He ruined us for what I’m guessing was his own gain.”

He gently elbowed my arm. “He couldn’t have gained that much, she’s been single since I’ve known her.”

“And how long is that?”

“Since Liam was a baby.” He sipped his coffee. “I met her when my wife and I attended the same parenting education class.”

My stomach flipped, not with disappointment but this weird sense of comfort.

“Thanks.”

“She’s a real good person, Beck.” Daniel half smiled as he stood up. “She deserves the whole damn world.”

“I know she does. She always did.” I looked down at the worn concrete. “Her and Liam are coming along to my cast removal appointment. We’re going to that new mini golf course after.”

“I’ll stay away then. You just tell me what’s been said.” I was about to agree because to be honest, I’d rather it just be me, Em, and Liam, but he didn’t give me the chance to speak. “Looks like all the boys are here. Let’s get to it.”

“Right, boys. Warm up, one jogging lap around the pitch,” I called from behind Daniel who looked surprisingly impressed that I was the one who took charge of training today. “Sorry,” I muttered. “Hope you don’t mind?”

“Nah, mate, it’s nice to have some help. Do you want to handle the rest of the session? I've got some paperwork to sort out.”

“Course.” As Daniel left to do what he needed to do in the office, I called out drills for the kids to carry out. Despite the chill in the air, they were on it. They hit every drill perfectly.

“Boys, I’m going to split you up—red bibs versus blue for a friendly match.” I started to call out names, separating them into two teams before standing off to the side and observing the match.

“How are they doing?” Daniel asked, appearing at my side. “Are they ready for Saturday?”

“More than ready. I can see these boys winning their league at the end of the season.” I smiled, but it soon fell when I realised I wouldn’t be there to see it.

Daniel must have noticed my expression and also realised that I wouldn't be able to make it. “Maybe you can fly back for the last match. See Liam lift that trophy as captain,”

“If I can, I will.” But I didn’t hold high hopes. If my fitness was where it needed to be and where I wanted it to be, then I’d be lifting my own trophy.

“Foul!” I shouted at Timmy when he tackled Liam from behind without thinking. Timmy raised his hands as if he’d done nothing wrong. “Timmy, bench.”

He scoffed. “But, Beckett, it’s just a friendly game!”

“That tackle was anything but friendly.” I kept my cool, not wanting to look as though I had a favourite, because I obviously did.

“No, but—” Timmy protested.

“I don’t want to hear another excuse. You weren’t taught to tackle that way, and I don’t want to see it again. Otherwise, you can say hello to the bench for the rest of the season.”

I stayed as calm as I could manage, though my chest tightened the moment I saw Liam limping toward me. His steps were uneven, his jaw clenched, and my instincts screamed to rush over and scoop him up. But I didn’t—I held steady, giving him the space to come to me, to be strong if he needed to be.

He stopped in front of me, cheeks flushed and fists balled at his sides. I turned to face him, bracing for tears, for the moment the pain would break through his brave little shell. But instead, all I saw was fire.

“You alright, mate?” I asked, voice low and careful.

“I’m good!” he snapped, his voice tight with barely contained frustration. “Timmy just needs to learn how to tackle cleanly!”

He jerked his chin toward the kid across the field, his emerald eyes narrowing with a look far too intense for someone so small. His pride was hurt more than anything, and he wasn’t about to let anyone see weakness—not even me. Still, I could see the tremble in his bottom lip, the way he shifted his weight off his sore leg, and the hint of betrayal that came with being knocked down unfairly.

“You went down too easily.” Timmy scoffed.

“Shut up, Timmy!” Liam responded with a scowl.

“Right. That’s enough, the pair of you. Timmy, I expect you to apologise to Liam for what just happened.”

“Sorry, L,” Timmy started. “I didn’t mean to tackle that hard.”

“Alright, but do it again and I’ll—” Liam started, but of course, I didn’t let him finish.

I stepped forward and clapped my hands as a way to distract them. “Liam,” I glanced at him as I spoke. “Timmy, join your team and keep those tackles clean.” He nodded before running off to join in again. “Liam, what was that retaliation about?”

“Nothing. He’s just a?—”

“I don’t want to hear whatever is about to come out of your mouth, thank you very much.”

He looked up at me. “I was only going to say that he’s a nice boy.”

“Sure, you were.” I rolled my eyes, settling back into the plastic seat off to the side of the pitch. “You good to get back to your team?”

“Yeah, all good.” He ran back towards the boys as if nothing had happened.

Daniel and I observed the rest of the match, noting who would provisionally start on Saturday before finalising on Wednesday.

“I think the team looks solid,” I said.

“You’re speaking like you’re back in the league.” Daniel joked, but I knew he agreed.

***

After training finished, Liam and I walked in the direction of the small diner not far from Emily’s house. Liam sprinted to the door, holding it open for me as I approached on my crutches.

“You need more help than me,” he teased, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“You’re cheeky, you know.” I entered the restaurant with Liam close behind. “You remind me of your Uncle Harry.”

“I get that a lot. Maybe I’d remind you of my dad if you knew him.” Those words were a stab to my heart. The kid had no idea and I hated it.

"Yeah," I breathed out. "That would have been cool if I knew him."

Fuck… I hated lying to him. To my son.

Just then, the waiter approached and asked, “Table for two?”

“Please,” I nodded, before following the waiter to our table.

“Wait a minute. Aren’t you Beckett Ashmore?” The waiter’s smile stretched to his ears, giving the Cheshire cat a run for its money.

“He is.” For once, Liam looked proud of who he thought was a family friend.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’ll be back shortly to take your order.”

“I’ll need to add on something to take out once we’re done here, is that alright?” I asked.

“No problem at all.” He handed us our menus before hurrying off to join the group of waitresses that stared over in our direction from the hostess stand.

Liam cocked his head towards them with a chuckle. “You’ve got a fan club.”

“I’m not bothered about them. Now, what are you having?”

“Can I have a burger with a load of ketchup, chips, and a chocolate milkshake?” He didn’t even need to look at his menu. He was already certain.

“You can have whatever you like, mate.”

“Are you ready to order?” The waiter was back in record time as if he’d already heard Liam decide.

I recited our order to the waiter, who jotted it down on his pad.

“Single or double burgers?” He asked.

“Double, thanks.” I handed him the menus as Liam’s eyes widened with delight. “What’s that face for?”

“Mum only ever lets me get a single!” The excitement on his face was clear as day.

“Is that because you never finish it?”

His mouth fell open, shocked. “How’d you know?”

“Because your mum was exactly the same when we went to school. She could never finish a double.”

“Alright, so what did she get then?” he asked.

“A single cheeseburger with lettuce and ketchup, chips, and a banana milkshake.”

“You actually knew?! You must have been close to my mum.”

“We were really good friends, so yeah, I still remember what she ordered since it was the same every single time.” I laughed as the waiter returned with our milkshakes.

“Wow, they’ve never brought it out that fast before!” He took a huge gulp of the sweet drink, and I waited for the brain freeze complaint but it never came. “Must be because you’re here with me.”

I waved off his comment, not caring about who knew I was here. I was enjoying time with my son and that’s all I truly wanted. Maybe I’d get to spend a little time with Emily later, too, but we’d have to take that day by day.

Ten years ago…

“How do you know what I like to order? We’ve only been here once.” She looked at me in disbelief.

“I know a lot about you, Em.” I kissed her cheek as Harry and Mike walked towards our booth.

She wanted to distance herself, but I didn’t let her. I pulled her as close as I possibly could, her body flush to mine.

“You know, she’s my sister, and I don’t need to see whatever this is.” Harry groaned as he slid into the booth with us.

“Well, feel free to sit somewhere else,” I told him.

“Mate, are you really going to disrespect Harry like that?” Mike chimed in.

“Nobody asked for your input, Mikey. There is no disrespect. I’m just having some time with my girl, and if neither of you like it or want to see that, then you can kindly fuck off.” I smiled, sipping the milkshake Em and I shared.

“Alright, calm down, Mike. I’m only kidding. I’m good with my sister’s choice in wanting to date Beckett.” Harry smiled at Emily.

“You staying or going?” I asked Mike who clearly didn’t like that question since his face scrunched up in annoyance.

“Staying.” He flopped down beside Harry in the booth, looking anywhere other than at Em and me.

I linked my fingers with Emily’s, draping my arm over her shoulder. “I can’t wait to get you back to mine,” I whispered in her ear.

Her eyes darted towards her brother who was too lost in the menu to care. The colour of them glimmered, making them even more beautiful than they already were. “Ah, yeah, why’s that?”

“I guess you’ll have to wait and see.”

Present day…

The waiter placed my food in front of me, interrupting my memories of Emily. Liam was in his element the second his food arrived. He wasted no time digging in.

“Thanks.” I nodded.

“Beckett, this is incredible!” Liam spoke between bites.

“Good to know.” I bit into my burger, realising this was one of the only things that hadn’t changed over the years. “Just as I remember it.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah.” I took a chip and dipped it into my milkshake, something I’d done since I was a kid.

“No way! You do that too?!” Liam grabbed a chip and mirrored my action.

“Of course, it’s the best!”

He smiled so wide as I shoved a milkshake covered chip into my mouth.

It was nice to see that Liam’s attitude had subsided. I couldn’t work out if that was because of Emily’s influence, or because I wasn’t as bad as he originally thought.

After I paid and received Emily’s food, we walked home. The temperature in the air had dropped drastically. After Liam knocked on the door, Emily answered within seconds, wearing that heart stopping smile of hers.

“I had a double burger!” Liam blurted out before she had the chance to say hello.

“Drop me in it, why don’t you, mate.” I laughed as Emily mirrored it.

“Mum, it was so good! And guess what?!”

“What?” She asked.

“Beckett dips his chips in his milkshake too!” He beamed, darting past Emily and up a couple of steps before turning around and coming back down them. “Thanks for dinner, Beckett.” He waved his goodbye then disappeared up the stairs for good.

“Well, he seems happy,” Emily commented.

“I think he had a good time.” I held out the takeaway bag for her. “Here’s yours.”

“Thank you. You really didn’t have to.” She blushed, the apples of her cheeks turning a soft shade of pink as I stepped closer to her and invaded her personal space. "I'm surprised you even remembered my order.”

“I never forgot anything about you, Em.” I brushed a stray tendril of hair out of her face as she peeked up at me through her ebony lashes. “I missed you,” I murmured, the warmth of my breath trailing her delicate skin.

“Beckett, you’re here for Liam and that’s all…” She dropped her gaze and took a step back.

“Em…” My ice cold fingers brushed her much warmer ones. “I never said I wasn’t here for Liam, but?—”

“Don’t. Please just focus on your relationship with your son.” She stepped back, welcoming the distance between us. “Thank you for bringing me dinner home.”

“Emily…”

“I’ll text you later about Liam.” She closed the door softly behind her.

Fuck… This was so bloody hard.