Page 81 of After Anna

You awake, babe?Noah had asked softly.

What do you think?

I’m sorry. I really am. Noah had turned over, but Maggie hadn’t. She had on a T-shirt, though she always slept naked this time of year, and so did he. He’d always liked that about them as a couple.

That was terrible, Noah. You behaved terribly.

I know, and I’m sorry. I just lost it. It was only partly because of Mike. But that wasn’t all of it.Noah had still felt he’d been right about theRange Rover, but he hadn’t wanted to start all over again.No matter what I think about her getting the car, I shouldn’t have yelled like that. At you, Anna, or at Caleb. I’m sorry.

It was terrible. Maggie hadn’t turned around.She thinks she’s not welcome here. And I don’t blame her. You’re not making her feel welcome.

I know and I’m sorry.

You have to apologize to her.

I will.

I’m going to make a special dinner tomorrow night, Indian food. She told me she loves it. And it’s her first day of school. You can apologize then.

I’d be happy to,Noah had said, meaning it. His father had been one of those men who would never say he was sorry.

Can you imagine how she feels? She moves in here, having lost her father, having no sense of place at all, moving to a new state and a new family, and the welcome she gets is you yelling at her?

I understand.

We don’t yell at our kids. That’s not our values, as you say, is it?

No, I know that.Noah had heard the shakiness in her voice and realized that she might’ve been crying earlier. He’d put a hand on her shoulder, but she hadn’t moved. Normally, she would’ve turned over and they would’ve hugged or had make-up sex. That wasn’t happening tonight, so he didn’t even try. He’d removed his hand.

She was crying in her bedroom.

I’m sorry. Noah had found himself counting, that had been the fourth time he’d said he was sorry.

And what about the driving?

I’ll take her. It had galled Noah that he’d be teaching Anna to drive in that car, but whatever.

What if she doesn’t want you to, now? The car is obviously a sore spot.

I’ll convince her, I’ll say I’m sorry. Noah had ticked it off in his head.Fifth time.

I thought it was a chance for you guys to get close. I thought it was something you could share. Now it’s all ruined.

It’s not ruined,Noah had said, though it was Anna’s fault, not his.

She was looking up lawyers, too.

Why? Is she going to sue me?

It’s not funny.

Okay, fine. Noah had heard irritation creep into his voice. He’d been trying to stay patient, but there was a limit. Mike Wilson had died today. Dina had been so distraught she’d had to be sedated. Steve had asked Noah if Mike had suffered before he died. Noah hadn’t had the heart to tell him the truth.

Anna’s thinking about whether she should emancipate herself so she doesn’t have to live here. Because you’re not succeeding in making her feel welcome, and I feel like I’m cleaning up after you. Even Caleb is really trying to be nice to her. You should’ve seen the two of them, laughing in the car.

Noah had stayed silent. He’d thought about what Caleb had said in the backyard.

You have to make this right, Noah. We need to earn her trust in the beginning. Some things you just can’t come back from. Sometimes there’s just too much damage done.