Page 10 of After All This Time (A Time For Love #2)

Cooper

T he small hikes we take almost kill us.

So, we do them again and again during the next couple of days we stay here.

Every day we hike around the beautiful expanses of trees; we ride our bikes on the easy trails that are safe even for the families with children that we come across; we even manage to jump into the water a couple of times when the waves merely slosh calmly on the shore.

They are probably the happiest days of my life, and I’ve had a lot of them.

I drag Liam around to do anything I can think of and he lets me. Even when he’s dead on his feet from walking, or when our thighs are burning from biking, or when the sun has done a number on us because we didn’t put enough sunscreen on.

Just as he lets me sleep close to him at night, wrapped up in his arms.

My chest twinges at the thought. I don’t know why I keep seeking him out when night falls and everything falls silent around us. Scolding myself hasn’t worked. It’s as if the closer we get to leaving this place, the needier I am to make sure he’s somewhere close where I can see him and touch him.

And he never pushes me away. Even if he would have every right because who would want someone so clingy with them all the time?

I don’t like how thinking about this is making me feel, and thankfully the bright orange and reddish flames burning in front of me are enough to distract me.

We’re sitting around a campfire another group close to our age has made in a pit, in the middle of their camping spot.

Being as outgoing as I am, has had its perks so far; we’ve been invited to eat together with other groups, or play around on the beach, or even sit around a fire like we’re doing now.

I’m nursing a plastic cup that tastes like there isn’t just juice in it, so I’m going slow with it.

A buzz is nice, getting sloppy is not.

A girl from the group has been chatting with me almost since I got here and I’ve been trying to find a way to extricate myself without seeming rude for the past 20 minutes.

I throw a look over my shoulder at Liam, hoping to communicate silently an SOS signal, but he’s staring at his cup intently before he chugs it all in one go.

I frown at the sight and the need to extricate myself has just become much more urgent.

“Hey, listen,” I interrupt the girl. “I’m sorry but I have to get back to my friend there. I need to talk to him about something.” I smile at her, in the hopes that it softens my ditching her so abruptly.

“Oh, sure,” she says, her smile falling slightly. “No problem, I’ll catch you later.”

“Thanks. See you later.”

With a small parting wave, I head over to Li, who’s still looking at his cup as if it will reveal the mysteries of the universe.

Sitting down next to him, I nudge him with my shoulder.

“Hey, what’s up, man? Did someone steal your favorite toy?” I chuckle, thinking it will make him join in.

But he doesn’t. Instead, his gaze meets mine and the fire must be playing tricks with my eyes because his eyes are blazing. I’ve never seen him so serious and it makes my smile freeze on my lips.

“What’s wrong?” I manage to utter.

He holds that expression for a few more moments before he shrugs.

“Nothing. Why?”

I snort. “Why? Because you look like...”

“Like what?”

“I... I don’t know. You look strange. And why did you drink all that? You know better than I do that that’s not orange juice.”

He’s not looking at me right now but I can see how his jaw is clenching hard, his expression even harder. Which becomes even clearer when he suddenly stands up.

“You know what? I think I’m gonna head back to the tent. I’m tired.”

He’s still not looking my way.

Is he avoiding my gaze?

I’m too busy focusing on that that I almost miss his next words.

“But you’re free to stay if you want. I don’t want to cockblock you.”

To say that I’m stunned would be an understatement. My jaw is probably hanging off its hinges.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

He doesn’t answer but instead starts making his way towards the path that leads to our camping spot.

“Hey! Li! Where are you going? Wait up!”

I feel as if I’m practically jogging to catch up to him. There’s no one around us but the trees and the quiet.

“Liam!” My hand shoots out and grips his bicep hard enough to make him halt his steps.

He stops but he doesn’t turn around towards me, just keeps staring straight ahead.

“Hey. Look at me.” I shake his arm. “Look at me!”

My tone must be showing my confusion and my hurt because suddenly his eyes are on me.

I don’t understand what’s going on. Is he mad at me? Did I do something to make him angry?

I take a deep breath. “What’s going on, Li?” I ask him calmly.

His green eyes are almost black in the darkness so it’s difficult to read them. But for some reason that look raises the hair on my arms, my skin breaking into goosebumps.

Liam just shakes his head. “There’s nothing going on.”

Okay, now he’s starting to piss me off.

“Yeah, I’m not buying that, buddy.”

“Just let it go, Coop.” His voice is low and harsh, nothing like the familiar smooth and steady tone I’m used to.

Even given all that, I don’t know what makes me say what I say next.

“Or what?”

It’s like a switch being flipped, right in front of my eyes.

I’m still gripping his arm, which is why I feel more than see how he’s moving towards me.

My feet are moving of their own accord, taking step after step backwards, my hand dropping by my side, until my back meets the rough surface of what can only be a tree.

But Liam doesn’t stop. He halts only when he’s almost stepped into me and I have to tilt my head slightly up to make out his expression in the shadows. The evening breeze stirs the branches above us, making way for the soft moonlight that falls on Liam’s face.

And the torment I see there makes my breath catch.

My heart is pounding in my chest. Why is my heart beating so loudly?

And… and he’s so close. Why is he looking at me like that? I don’t unders—

His hand finds my face in a tender caress that almost makes me shiver, and the way he cradles me, softly, like I’m something fragile he doesn’t want to break, stops the words in my throat.

I try to swallow and he must feel it where his thumb grazes my Adam’s apple.

I’m rooted in place, grounded in the imperceptible touch, powerless not to watch him as he leans towards me, close, closer, never breaking eye-contact, until his forehead touches mine. He smells like soap, like smoke from the campfire, and something uniquely Liam I’d never noticed before.

I try to make sense of what’s happening but I can’t because my brain is not working. My ears are ringing and my heart wants to beat out of my chest.

I’m having trouble breathing so I part my lips in an attempt to suck in some air but my lungs fail me.

I feel more than see when his lips softly catch my upper lip, when they move to my bottom one, kissing it painfully tenderly, achingly sweet.

His lips are wet, so wet.

It’s… it’s…

The action makes a gasp finally escape my mouth.

And that’s the gasp that breaks him out of his almost dreamlike state.

I watch as his eyes widen and fill with horror, as he snatches his hand back and hastily moves away from me, leaving me to support my weight with the help of the tree behind me.

I’ve never felt more disoriented, but one thing that is stark clear is the sudden absence of warmth against me.

I don’t move for fear my legs might give out, but I can’t not move when I hear him start mumbling.

“What have I done?” he shakes his head. “I’m so sorry, Coop. I didn’t mean to do any of this. I’m so fucking sorry.”

I’m moving before I even realize it.

“What are you sorry about?”

My heartbeat hasn’t slowed yet. I don’t even know if it’s going to slow down ever again.

My head is all over the place and I feel hot, and cold, and confused. So fucking confused.

But I can’t focus on any of that because Li is having a fucking meltdown right in front of me.

“Hey. Li,” I say, lifting my hand to touch him but he flinches away. “It’s okay, you have nothing to be sorry about.”

The laugh he lets out is hard, without so much as a hint of humor in it.

“Li, I promise you it’s fine. I’m fine.”

“Nothing is fine, Cooper!” he bursts out. And then in a softer voice, “Nothing.”

With a heartbreaking look on his face, he turns around and starts walking towards our tent.

I follow a few moments later, a ball of dread sitting heavy in my stomach.