Page 239 of A University of Betrayal

Thinking of our inspiring conversations,

Alarik

I don’t know what to say.

He’s such a rebel. And it feels like we have some kind of common project to work on now. I hope you’re not angry with me, but I’m going there on Thursday. The Circle won’t find out about it... And I’m not hurting anyone. On the contrary. I have the feeling that this research could help to renew something outdated, perhaps even the whole system we live in.

Beloved Mum,

Diana found the jacket in the laundry and confronted me. I didn’t know what to say, because I didn’t know her opinion on the Ruisangors topic. But I told her. I confessed everything to her. Almost everything. I left out the part about the feelings as a precaution, because I hadn’t even been able to process that myself yet. I often had to think back to that day. To that moment.

Diana is worried. She said, “Actually, I’m not surprised, especially since you’ve been seeing the Senseque.”

I blushed.

“Did Amanda tell you that?”

“I didn’t tell her,” Amanda had called from the hallway. She had just come from Moenia and had Alaister with her.

He gave me a brief smile, but he had looked so exhausted, believe me. He must have had extra practice with Gloria again.

I’d touched his arm by chance, and he’d been so cool again.

“Tell what?” he asked, pulling himself up onto one of the kitchen countertops.

“You won’t believe this, but she’s hanging out with the director’s son.”

“Oh, is she?”

Alaister raised an eyebrow and scrutinized me longer than usual. I realize that he knows Alarik from campus and that he knows what he is. But there was something else...

“Don’t make such a big deal out of it,” I began. “It’s about the ideas, and besides, I don’t have anyone else here who’s interested in literature.”

Alaister and Diana wanted to protest, but I was quicker.

“Your biology tomes don’t count.”

Amanda had asked me about these ideas afterward, which led to us sitting in the kitchen for three hours talking about the species.

I can sense the enthusiasm in the others, even if they are all worried. But with Diana in particular, I sense a growing interest, especially in the inheritance of our DNA and why there are no hybrids. She and Alaister discussed whether there had ever been experiments in this direction and how ethical they would have been.

I don’t know how to describe it, but two hours ago I had an idea. I don't know to what extent I can write this down here... That’s why I might not write about it in here at all. On Thursday I would ask Alarik for his opinion.

Beloved Mum,

Diana told me to make the DeLoughrey man’s jacket disappear, preferably burn it. I had laughed because I knew she wanted to ask me about my powers but didn’t dare.

Every Quatura always has way too much respect for me when we are in Moenia. I hate that. It creates a distance between us all. Just because my powers are strongest there doesn’t mean I use them. And just because my magic comes from within doesn’t mean I’m going to set everything around me on fire right away. I explained to Diana how I felt about it, and she understood straight away.

And no, of course I didn’t burn his jacket!

Even worse, I went looking for the charming Ruisangor on campus today because I was not sure about where a Ruisangor usually hangs out. Certainly not on the big campus lawn. So, I had walked through the inner courtyards, but no one had been there either. It felt as if this encounter had been a deceptively beautiful product of my imagination. As if I had seen a ghost. And if this strange ghost hadn’t given me his suit jacket, believe me, I wouldn’t have believed he existed.

Disappointed, I had given up and returned to Diana, who had greeted me with a “I hope you never see him again.” I had slightly resented her “Just for your protection” because I wasn’t a baby and I didn’t really believe in the legends about Blairville’s horror stories.

I would ask him about it as soon as I found him. I certainly would.

Beloved Mum,