Page 60

Chapter

Fifty-Seven

L oche’s lips didn’t leave hers when he lifted her off the table, shifting her so she straddled his lap as he took her place. His hands found her hair again, and he wrapped the golden strands in one of his fists, tilting her head backward.

When his mouth left hers, a muffled complaint left her throat, and Loche’s low laugh fanned over the sensitive skin of her neck as he trailed his lips down.

Shivers racked her body as his hot breaths ignited every nerve, and she wrapped her legs around his back, her arms locking around his neck, forcing their bodies closer.

Her chest rose and fell with his, and Loche growled again as he unfastened her cloak.

A sharp exhale left her as it fell to the floor, and he hooked a finger inside her tunic, pulling it off her shoulder to let his mouth explore more of her skin.

But when he went to pull it farther down, fear stabbed at her like a knife, breaking through the clouded heat scorching her mind .

Lessia shifted, gripping his hand.

Stilling, he pulled back, eyes searching hers.

The desire swimming in his steely ones made her cheeks flush, and Loche grinned—that boyish, playful grin that lit up his entire face—as he released her hair and lifted his hand to trace the crimson blooming across her face.

“I love it when you blush like this.”

His husky rasp was full of promises, and without thinking, she leaned in and kissed the corner of his mouth.

“I love it when you smile like this,” she whispered as she straightened.

Their eyes locked, and Lessia couldn’t breathe as emotions raced across his face.

“Come away with me.”

Her eyes widened, and for a second, she thought about nodding.

Letting go of all her responsibilities.

Being utterly selfish and taking him somewhere they could never be found.

But then her gaze snagged on the arm wrapped around his neck.

As she began shaking her head, Loche’s hand cupped her face and gently stopped the movement, his thumbs brushing over her lips.

“We have a few days between the final hardship and the election, and trust me, it won’t be pleasant. Let’s go away—just you and me. Forget all of this for a while.”

A chasm of ice opened in her chest at the hope in his eyes, and she averted her own, fixing them on his heaving chest.

“I can’t,” she whispered.

“Why not?” His voice was soft.

Curious.

As if he truly didn’t understand .

Swallowing, she forced her eyes to meet his. “Merrick is injured. I need to take care of him. And I have duties here. My friends…”

Loche gave her a crooked smile. “I’ll have our best healer tend to him.

She can even move into your room while we’re gone.

Although something tells me Merrick would be quite opposed to that.

And Zaddock can check on your friends. He’d be happy for it.

I think he might have developed a small obsession with the blonde.

As for your duties—it’s only a few days, Lessia. ”

Amalise’s words echoed in her mind.

You deserve love.

Promise me if there is a chance you find it, you will.

She’d made that promise.

And while she wasn’t sure if this was love, she’d never before felt the warm feeling coursing through her veins as she met Loche’s eyes.

Hadn’t ever had her heart skip a beat like it did when Loche smirked at her.

But chilling guilt mingled with the warmth, and she winced as the memories from earlier flooded her mind.

If she went with him…

If she was this selfish…

Eyes narrowing, Loche leaned forward. “I’ve learned the hard way not to feel guilty over doing something selfish once in a while. It gets lonely at the top, Lessia. And I have a feeling you’ve been lonely for a long time.”

She rubbed her neck, suddenly very aware of how close they were. How strong Loche’s legs were beneath her. How hard the chest she rested against was. How soft the skin at the base of his neck was.

Goose bumps raced across her skin when he grinned at her, pulling her other arm around his neck and leaning his forehead against hers.

“I’m not the begging type, Lessia. But if you need me to, I’ll get on my knees. I’m already risking everything. I don’t mind throwing my pride into the ring as well.”

Despite everything, a giggle bubbled up her throat, and Loche’s mouth twitched.

“You think that’s funny, darling?”

Raising a brow, she grinned at him, grateful that some of the tension in the room eased. “You just surprise me, is all.”

Loche winked at her. “You don’t know me as well as you think you do. Besides, I can think of some very good reasons to get on my knees before you. And I promise you won’t be laughing then.”

She thought her face might melt off, and Loche chuckled softly. “There’s that blush again.”

His eyes wandered over her face, and he shook his head. “You’re so beautiful.”

Shaking her head back, Lessia shifted, creating some distance between them. “I’m Fae. We’re all beautiful.”

Loche moved his hands from her face to wrap them around her waist, pulling her to him and erasing the space again, and his eyes bore into hers.

“You’re Lessia. And you’re the most interesting woman I’ve ever had the honor to meet.

You’re beautiful, and kind, and caring, and intelligent.

And somehow, you seem to have an inkling of interest in me.

I am not known to let opportunities pass me by, and I won’t do it with you.

If I am lucky enough that the feelings I sense from you are true, I will always cherish them.

I’ll do anything to keep them, fuel them, make them burn bright even in the darkest of winter. ”

A lump formed in her throat as a small piece of the walls she’d built around her heart shattered, each pulse echoing in her ears .

She hadn’t known how much she needed to hear those words.

That he saw her for Lessia.

Not half-Fae or half-human.

Just…

Lessia.

His eyes flitted between hers, something soft settling in his gaze. “How about you speak to Merrick to see what he thinks of you going away?”

A sigh escaped her as she burrowed her face into his neck, drawing deep breaths of his minty smell.

How did he know that was the right thing to say?

There was no way Merrick would approve, but at least then she could blame her guard, and even if she could feel that Loche wouldn’t fault her regardless, she didn’t have to be the one to let him down.

His large hands stroked her back, and when she pulled away, he brushed his lips against hers before lifting them both off the table.

As he set her down on the floor, Loche reached out a hand, and she didn’t hesitate as she took it and allowed him to lead her out of the library.

The soldiers who had followed her there still stood guard outside, and while they shared a look when they noticed their joined hands, neither said anything.

They remained quiet as they all followed her to her chambers, and outside the door, Lessia hesitated.

Loche didn’t.

Without a glance at the guards, he pulled her to him, kissing her until her breath caught in her throat. When he finally pulled away, her lips ached, and a deeper ache burned in her core as he remained outside until she opened the door, slipping inside .

Leaning her back against the door, she caught her breath.

Lessia trailed her fingers over her lips, and she couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face.

“Where were you?”

She tensed, and her eyes rose to the brightly lit room.

Merrick sat fully clothed on her bed, his bent-down face paler than usual but his back straight and shoulders squared.

No sign that he’d been grievously wounded earlier in the evening.

For the first time, a twinge of envy tightened in her chest at his full Fae blood.

While half-Fae healed quicker than humans, she wouldn’t have survived if it had been her.

Fear crawled up her spine as she realized that getting more involved with Loche would likely put her in more situations like that of tonight.

When Merrick cleared his throat, she opened her mouth to speak, but he was faster.

“I can smell him on you. Spare me the details.”

Face burning, she opened a window, letting the winter breeze cool her skin.

And hopefully diluting whatever Merrick could smell on her.

With her back to him, she said quietly, “He wants me to go away with him for a few days. I said no, of course.”

It was quiet for a moment, and she turned, pulling the chair by the window around to face Merrick.

The Fae gripped her blankets tightly, his face strained as he spoke. “Why did you say no?”

She shrugged, biting her cheek at the guilt threatening to take her voice. “Because I can’t do that to him. It’s not fair to him when he doesn’t know everything about me. ”

“But you want to go?” Merrick’s voice was barely carrying over the strong wind roaring in the room.

Shrugging again, she glanced down at her hands. “It doesn’t matter what I want. I can’t.”

He drew a shaky breath through his nose, knuckles gripping the blanket blanching. “I think you should.”

Lessia’s eyes flew wide.

“You think I should?” she echoed.

With a nod, Merrick rose from the bed, his movements jerky as he used the bedpost to steady himself. “It will be good for you. Our king won’t come back for a while, and you have a few days off.”

She blinked. “You don’t think it’s too dangerous?”

Making his way to his room, Merrick lingered by the door, his fingers tapping the wooden frame.

“Everywhere is dangerous right now. But perhaps the castle is the most dangerous of all. Go, Lessia. I have some matters to tend to anyway, so I won’t be around.

And while he is human, I believe the man can protect you. Perhaps better than I can.”

Her mouth still hung open as the door closed behind him.

As she lay down in the bed, anticipation danced across her skin, and a stupid smile wouldn’t leave her face even as sleep took her.

She had no nightmares that night.