Page 118 of A Thousand Cuts

“Sit,” Fix said, and Liam jerked his head up, staggering back when he realized Fix was even more angry than he’d thought.

His eyes were blazing. Lips set into a thin line. His hands were clenched into fists next to his hips and… Liam knew him. He knew the relaxed way Fix carried himself. This tense, wound-tight man in front of him wasn’t his daddy. Not that Liam had a daddy anymore.

“What?” he whispered, and Fix pointed to the armchair next to the window.

“Sit down,” he said, even firmer. Liam glanced at the door, arms tightening around his middle. Where Fix’s should be. Where they’d never be again.

“I should leave,” he said, and Fix glared at him, stalking closer until he was looming over him, forcing him to look up.

“Leave?” he said through gritted teeth. “You want to leave?”

“I just…”

“You just what, Liam?” Fix asked, voice getting louder. “Do you have better things to do than be here?”

“I just don’t want to…”

“Just sit down,” Fix said again, and Liam folded into the chair, unable to resist the command in his voice. He still belonged to him. Even if Fix didn’t want him anymore.

He didn’t raise his voice at Liam. Liam was pretty sure he never would. But he realized there was a chill in his voice that hadn’t been there before and it made him feel cold all over. His bottom lip wobbled and he pinched it to stop it. His eyes burned.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, bringing the back of his hand up to catch an escaped tear. “I didn’t mean to put anyone in danger. I didn’t think—”

“That’s absolutely correct,” Fix interrupted him, and Liam tried stopping the tears, he really did. “You didn’t think. Not for a single second did you stop and think.”

“Please don’t hate me,” he choked out. “I’ll go and apologize to everyone and leave and you won’t have to—”

“Will you stop talking about leaving!” Fix said sharply, and Liam huddled back into the armchair, heart hammering in his throat. It didn’t sound like his daddy. Not even close.

“I’ll do whatever you want me to,” he sobbed. He just wanted this to be over. The pain was tearing him apart. He wanted King. He wanted to be alone. He wanted his daddy so bad he felt like he’d choke.

“I want you to care.” Fix’s voice shook, and Liam looked up into his eyes, gasping when he realized Fix was crying too.

“Fix…” He exhaled before the man fell to his knees in front of him, grabbing his hands and pulling him forward until their foreheads collided.

“I want you to care about what happens to you. I want you to want to live,” Fix said. “I want you to fucking want to stay with me, Liam.”

“I do,” Liam said, gripping Fix’s strong hands, digging his nails into the soft skin of his palms.

“I didn’t know where you were. I didn’t know if I’d get to you in time. I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again. I can’t…”

“Daddy,” Liam gasped when Fix dropped his head from his forehead onto Liam’s knees, kneeling in front of him, hunched and curled into Liam as he shook with tears.

“I could have lost you,” Fix said brokenly. He let go of Liam’s hands and wrapped his arms around Liam’s thighs, hugging him as hard as he could. He’d bruise. And he didn’t care. “Why would you make me lose you?”

Liam swallowed, staring at the larger-than-life man curled into him like a child. Tears slipped from his cheeks and onto the back of Fix’s shirt as he tried to respond. He hadn’t done it on purpose. He wasn’t trying to break them, he just…

“I just wanted it to be over,” he whispered.

Fix shook his head. “Did you not trust me to end it? To keep you safe?”

“Of course I did, Fix.”

“It doesn’t look that way.”

Fix lifted his head to look at him and Liam was thankful he was sitting down, because the look on Fix’s face would have brought him to his knees. Fix’s eyes were burning him. The look of total defeat stabbed him in the chest. He lifted his hand and pressed a palm over his heart like he could rub the pain away.

“I trust you with all I have,” Liam said desperately. “But this relationship has been skewed since the very start. I need you for far more than you need me, and it doesn’t seem fair. You do so much for me, and this was eating you alive and I just…I wanted to be happy. For once in my life I selfishly wanted to have everything I wanted without some asshole ruining it. I wanted to take things into my own hands and end this so you and I could have a real chance. I wanted you to not have to worry about me all the damn time.”