Page 65 of A Rising Hope (The Freckled Fate #3)

65

FINNLEAH

M y legs ached as I hiked a steep hill to the outskirts of the small town that the Destroyer armies had settled in. The serpentine rows of tall weeds and wildflowers turned a deep shade of blue under the silver moonlight spilling from the clear sky above.

Two dark heaps as tall as the hill itself leisured atop of it.

“Resting with your full bellies?” I shouted at them angrily. Two pairs of enormous yellow eyes opened, their vibrant color, like a sun, glowed in the dark.

The dragons didn’t move, watching me pant as I ran up the last remainder of the hill until I was just a step away from the tip of their elongated noses.

“You can’t do that to people,” I snapped at them. Both of them huffed a cloud of smoke in protest. I coughed. “Do you understand the havoc you caused? The chaos I have to deal with now because of you?” I raised my brow in question as I glared up at both of them.

They snuggled against each other, their enormous tails the size of bridges, wrapped around their vast wings all tucked in.

“You attack only on my command,” I scolded them, as if they were disobedient children. “You do not eat people, for fuck’s sake.” I rubbed the sides of my head. One of them gently nudged me with their muzzle, almost pushing me down the hill. “Do not eat humans.” Their yellow eyes blinked a few times in question. “It’s not up for discussion. Got it?” I pointed my finger at them, reprimanding.

They didn’t speak, but I somehow understood them. There was no need for language. Our souls simply communicated in a language no mind could recognize. Together we were one whole.

They were a part of me. And I was a part of them.

“Now enough complaining.” I let my fury calm at their piercing stares. “Just stay away from the people and towns for now while I try to figure out what the hell am I supposed to do.” I rubbed my forehead, trying to think.

“For a start, you could do me and then we could see where the night takes us.” A familiar chuckle sounded from behind, and I didn’t have to look back to know who was there.

“You were supposed to be resting.” I turned to face him. Gideon was climbing up the same hill, a long cane in one hand, a pair of boots in the other. He was still bare from his waist up, though this time there was a new accessory. My eyes lingered on the wedding band tied on his wrist. I tried not to smile at the notion, but the crooked tug found its way onto my face anyway.

The man couldn’t find a shirt, but made sure he put on a makeshift wedding band.

“If I remember correctly, and I do, your exact words were, ‘learn how to walk first and then we’ll talk’.” He shook the cane in the air, as if proving his point.

“Who’s the poor soul you stole a cane from?” I said loudly, watching him struggle the last few steep steps of the hill.

“Sweet of you to think I stole it.” The corner of his mouth tugged upwards at my narrowed glower. I didn’t take his bait, so he continued, “The man will be fine, he’ll recover, the girl whose boots I got, on the other hand, probably scarred for life. Here.” Gideon threw the pair of boots at me, before unexpectedly collapsing to the ground like he’d meant to do that all along.

Fuck.

I slid down the hill, reaching for him. His cane dropped to the side; his eyes closed.

Fuck.

I scanned his body for any visible wounds, but there were none. I dropped to my knees near him, my hands reaching for his head, my heart racing.

But within a blink, he grabbed both of my wrists and with a single twist he rolled on top of me.

I gasped, but he was already pinning me against the dirt, laughing.

I’d slap him so hard had it not been for my restrained wrists.

“Prick! I thought you died again!” I wriggled under his hold, kneeing him only with half of the intent to the stomach.

“You didn’t actually think I’d stay in that cold and lonely bed the entire night, did you?” He smirked, enjoying himself. “Besides, I had to see these for myself.” His eyes darted to the two dragons, curiously observing us from the top of the hill. “Actual fucking dragons.” He shook his head like he was still questioning what his eyes saw, though it wasn’t too long before he returned his attention back to me. “Not too shabby for an assassin.”

“No, this .” I headbutted him straight in the nose, then kneed him hard enough where he buckled, losing his hold just long enough for me to twist under him, rolling him over until I was atop of him. This time it was me who was pinning his arms above his head. “This is not too shabby for an assassin.”

I knew he could overpower me, but he played along. I was going to say something snarky and vile, and yet my mind went blank, completely enamored by him. His muscled arms stretched and pinned above, playing along with my tricks, his chest rising in uneven breaths. His dark eyes reflected the silver glow of the stars above as my thighs pinned his waist. His perfect lips were just within reach and all I could think of was how I wanted to taste them, to get rid of these clothes that suddenly felt too tight around me.

I forced my disheveled thoughts to behave. Perhaps it was the moonlight, perhaps it was my own eyes absolutely enchanted by him, but I wasn’t sure how I had completely missed that divine power and beauty radiating from him before. His celestial glory swallowed the surrounding air.

I took a long breath, torn between an absolutely primal desire to devour him and the inner part of me that demanded retribution.

“I was going to wait until morning to give you some rest, but since you already seem to be in such good health, why wait?” I told him.

“Wait for what?”

I let go of his arms, reaching for the secret pocket sewed inside my shirt.

“For this.” I pulled a wrinkled letter out. His playful smirk turned to a regretful wince.

“You kept the letter . . . ” He grimaced, recognizing the paper with his own handwriting on it.

“Yes, of course I kept the damn letter.” I glared at him, content to see a flicker of remorse.

“Finnleah,” he started, as his hand reached for a strand of my hair to tuck behind my ear, but I turned away.

“No, I had a very long time to think about this. And you know what?” My lips turned into a thin line. The burning need to feel him deep inside me would have to wait. “As the Goddess of Justice and Mercy or whatever else, I am supposed to deliver justice for everyone. But what about me? Who is going to deliver justice for me? So, for once, I demand it for myself.” I let out a jaded scoff.

“Finnleah . . . ” He gently caressed my thigh with his hand.

“I fucking trusted you with my heart. We gave vows to each other and then you go and fucking write me a goodbye letter?”

“My love—” He closed his eyes, and perhaps for the first time I saw him crushed.

“No. Because let’s hear it.” I turned to the perfectly written lines and though it was dark, I had those hateful words memorized as I read. “‘ Live, Finnleah . . . live . . . Goodbye, my love, be happy ’ ?! First, how dare you? How dare you tell me what to do? And more so, how dare you tell me to be happy when you left me? You left with no intention of ever coming back. And you thought this shitty excuse of a letter would be sufficient to explain yourself? You promised me the world and a future. You promised me eternity and then said goodbye. Be happy without me?”

“I—”

“Do you know how many nightmares I had because of you?” I poked his chest with my finger at each word. “Do you know how I literally couldn’t sleep at all because each time I closed my eyes I saw you die?”

“You were going to be tortured and killed,” he said, as if that was a valid excuse.

“So, what?!” My arms flayed. “You should’ve let me die. I don’t care for my life if you are not in it.”

He sat up, his chest right next to mine as my legs wrapped around his hips. Our heartbeats skipped a matching beat.

“I am sorry, but I couldn’t do that, now, could I?” He gently tilted my chin up to meet his gaze. His calming eyes were too loving and too apologetic even for him, making my anger stutter. “When Insanaria took you, I?—”

“I had it handled.”

“You were bleeding out on the floor with both of your hands chopped off?—”

“A minor scrape considering what she did to you,” I argued.

“I’d live?—”

“Something you conveniently forgot to mention—” His forefinger paused on my lips, hushing me for a second, as he softly continued.

“I’d live, and you’d die, and if my theory about your powers was correct, which it was , you’d be forced to take your place as a god, never able to come back to earth again.”

I opened my mouth to object, but his eyes quietened me.

“And even if my theory was wrong, I couldn’t let you die, my love, you know that. I know that. Even Insanaria, to her credit, knew that. And if I had to sacrifice the world to save you, I would.”

“ You are my world, Gideon, and you sent yourself without even a second of hesitation to the gallows, without thinking twice of what that would do to me. I didn’t need your heroics. I needed you safe and I would’ve been happy being dead knowing that you’d be okay. But instead, you sentenced me to a life of misery without you and signed your verdict with your ‘be happy’ goodbye letter.”

My brows furrowed, jaw tense as I glowered at him, fully aware that there were only seconds until my anger would evaporate at his touch as he gently caressed my back, my arms, my shoulders and thighs.

“I am sorry it had to happen that way, my little wildfire. I am. Truly. There are a lot of things I have done wrong, a lot of questionable choices I have made, but I have never regretted anything more than that letter, than leaving you even if it was just for a moment. I am forever burdened with the heaviest weight of the guilt I feel for leaving you that morning, for even allowing such the possibility of Insanaria laying a finger on you. There is no amount of words you can say that I haven’t already told myself a thousand times worse. There won’t be a day I shall not spend regretting it,” he paused, his solemn gaze meeting mine. “Just as there won’t be a single day where I’d rather agree for you to die, Finnleah.”

There it was. The incontestable truth.

His biggest flaw. One I hated and yet loved even more.

“You left, and I lost my mind, Gideon.” My voice a whisper. “I stabbed your brother. I went to find the Queen with no regard for the people left behind. I was going to burn the world until I found you.” His fingers brushed my hair back in gentle strokes. Air caught in my lungs as a truth that I didn’t want to admit to myself spilled out with a soft brush of my lips. “And if my vision came true . . . if I had found you dead, I was going to have my dagger pierce my heart next to yours.” I knew the words were foolish. I bit the inside of my lip. My gaze dropped to my hands as I picked on my fresh scabs. “And when I’d die, I’d scorch the heavens and hells for you. I’d wage wars and infernos until I had found you.”

“Finnleah—”

“And when I’d find you, when I’d see your handsome face, probably chained in some obscure part of hell, I’d slap you so hard for leaving me.” My throat bobbed and I looked at him, no walls, no hidden locks or doors. All of me devoted to him. “And then I’d never let you go. Never , Gideon.”

The dragons near us puffed a cloud of smoke. Their warm breath, like white fog, settled in the valley. His intimate stare was overwhelming, his gaze settled in the deepest corners of my soul. Weighted silence intertwined our souls into one, silver threads making intricate designs of what was and what were to come.

We were one, as if time itself, with no beginning, no end.

“On heaven or earth, in light or darkness, worlds shall end, and new ones shall begin, and I’ll still find myself loving you even from the depths of the agonizing jaws of hell, Finnleah. I love you, my little wildfire, for the eternities and far beyond.” His lips brushed mine. “ Forever .”

“ Forever .” My lips touched his, eyes closed, as each cell in my body cried out for more.

He kissed me then, once more, this time longer, more keenly as I nudged my hips closer to him. My body ready to burn at his caress.

He paused. I stole a look only see him smiling, my arms wrapped around his shoulders.

“Why are you smiling?” I managed to say between my short, surfaced breaths.

“I thought you promised you were going to torture me first?” he chuckled gently, his hand slowly slid lower until he gripped the low of my back. “And yet here you are, molded by my touch.”

“Simply because you must suffer doesn’t mean I must too.” The corner of my mouth lifted at seeing that arrogant smile grow on his perfect face. “But don’t get me wrong, I fully intend on making you suffer.” I let my mouth utter nonsense; all thought lost as his hand slid even lower.

“Is that so?” he whispered into my ear, his lips trailing down the curve of my neck. “One might think you are practically begging me to fuck you.” His fingers slid past the low off my backside until his whole hand greedily grabbed my soaking core.

“One might think someone is rather delusional then,” I shot him the snarky reply, as my mind drowned in lust.

“Such a terrible liar.” Vicious laughter escaped from his lips as I moaned at the feel of his hand. My entire body craved more as I leaned into him, my nipples perked up hard against the harsh linen of my shirt. And though I knew it was a terrible idea, I hoped he’d incinerate my clothes right this moment. My lungs filled with his scent, making me feel lighter than a feather, and I floated in pleasure at his caress.

“Lucky for you, I, too, had a lot of time to think on things.” His lips found mine, and I dove for the kiss as if I’d suffocate without it. Hungry, starved, desperate. I didn’t care. I wanted him more than air, more than life itself.

“I am most definitely going to make you suffer for this.” Jagged words escaped from me between my uneven breaths as he worked through the ties of my corset. One by one.

Too long. Too fucking long . My patience ran out.

“Fuck it.” I yanked the small knife from my outer thigh, slapping it against his palm. “Burn it, cut it, I don’t fucking care.” My skin felt scorched, every inch sensitive even to a fleeting trace of wind.

“Beg,” he ordered, his wicked smirk too prideful as he watched me wither in anticipation. My body not able to contain the desire that pooled at my core.

I kissed him, dragging my teeth against his lip.

“How about I stab you in your little selfish heart instead?” I threatened. Both of my hands pushed him down, earning only a brief second of reprieve as I ground against his rock-hard cock.

“I’ll fuck that stubbornness out of you one day.”

“Never took you for a procrastinator.” The corner of my lips tugged upward in a wicked grin.

“True,” Gideon said, with a swift move rolling me over until he was on top once more. “I thought of you each day, each passing moment I was away from you,” he murmured, his voice a dangerous whisper. The sharp blade cut through the lacings, and he used both of his hands to rip my shirt, exposing my chest to his beguiling sight.

The mocking charades were gone now.

His eyes darkened as he drank in my body immersed in moonlight. My chest purred with feminine satisfaction at his gaze, so primal, so fucking feral. Just for me. Because of me.

I wanted him but he wanted me even more. He cupped my breast, his lips finding the most sensitive part as he kissed.

“You are fucking divine, Finnleah,” he uttered. “You are everything I desire. You are everything I crave. And if this is a hint of justice, then fucking heavens and hells, I shall spend my life atoning for all my sins just to get another taste of you.”

There was something so mighty, so overpowering to see his entire soul quake in my presence, to hunger for me with such strength that there wouldn’t be anything I could ask for that he would deny me of. A word from me and the most powerful man to ever exist would beg on his knees for a simple touch.

“I want you, Gideon. All of you. In all your glory. In all your might. I want it all,” I moaned. He met my look, understanding the silent ask. A thrill ran through my body.

I wasn’t dulling my godly powers, but in that moment, I realized that he had been masking his. Power rippled through the surrounding matter. His celestial exaltation uniting and tearing apart worlds all at the same time.

Universes collided and stars were born as he moved, plummeting deep into me. Pleasure like lightning seared through every corner of my soul. Our hearts united in a timeless rhythm. Our bodies singing a song of paradise, of heaven, of justice and of triumph.

His teeth scraped the tip of my aroused nipple, pain mixing with pleasure, sending me to places I had never been before. Anger, love, worry, excitement all mixed into one feeling of pure love. He moved faster, each thrust pushing me towards the edge into oblivion.

Time froze and my entire existence exploded as culmination thundered through my body. I moaned, a cry of pleasure.

We were divine.

Eternal.

One.

I traced lazy circles on Gideon’s chest, cuddled against his heart as we watched the imminent sunrise. The large half-circle of the sun painted the sky in bright lilac colors. The first rays of light tangled between the last shimmer of the stars.

“So have you figured out which part of your soul they’ve taken?” Gideon eyed the sleeping dragons, their loud exhales in perfect rhythm.

I looked at the scaly creatures, wondering. I didn’t feel much different and yet I was changed, whether it was from the realization of who I was, of who I had become, or of my soul being split, I wasn’t sure.

“No, not really,” I answered.

“Well,” Gideon smiled, “Considering their behavior, they got a bit of your stubbornness. Which, if you ask me, you had more than enough to go around, so I don’t mind.” He chuckled, his chest rumbling against my cheek. The sound warmed my scarred soul.

A few crickets chirped nearby, and we paused our conversation to listen to their song.

“So you burned all the darkness, huh?” Gideon continued after a while. We talked about everything that had happened to us in the last few weeks. I nestled closer to him. The velvety wing of the dragon wrapped around us, keeping us warm through the night.

“Yes, with your swords, it was like my raw fire exploded.”

“They are powerful swords, passed down from the first Destroyer to each of the following male Justice Wielders. The stones in them contain a drop of blood from each of the prior raw fire wielders, magnifying the magic, a contribution from and to each generation to follow.” He brushed a kiss on the top of my head. “Not even typical Destroyers can wield them. The fact that you were able to touch them without burning your hand that day in the Cursed Forest was another confirmation you were a Justice Wielder.”

“It wasn’t quite the most pleasant feeling,” I admitted.

“That is because while fire courses through your blood, so does other magic.”

The dragons shifted behind us, still deep in their sleep.

“Fucking elves.” Gideon rubbed the bridge of his nose, still stunned at my recollection of everything that had transpired while he was away.

“I still can’t believe they came. It was a wild gamble. But if Elf King was anything like Tuluma, there was a chance he’d listen to me.” My hand instinctively reached for Tuluma’s necklace, only to find it missing.

“What did you say to him?”

“Well, I wrote I am avenging your sister’s death, are you ?”

“That’s all?”

“I also included her necklace there too. I doubt that my message was all it took for him to set aside the waging hatred between our people, but I hope I get to learn one day why he chose to help. I hope I get to talk to him. I’d love to tell him about her. And hear him tell me about her before she cared for me.”

Elves. Destroyers. It didn’t matter to me. A piece of Tuluma’s heart beat in both of us.

“I wish I could pause time,” I spoke the quiet thoughts out loud, a part of me craving that this serene moment would last forever. “No more war, no more fighting, only the peace and comfort of your heartbeat. Just you and me. Forever.”

“We don’t have to pause time for that. We could still run away. Take the dragons, find some island and live out our days until we are ready to ascend to our godhoods.”

“You truly think you could walk away from all of this?”

“I found the only person I care about, everything else has no meaning or value to me. So if it causes you more harm than good, then fuck the title and the crown, let’s leave right this moment.”

“You make it sound so tempting.” I chewed on my lip, shamefully considering his offer because I was exhausted. My soul, my body, my mind, all so weary.

Only now, only near him, I let my guard down, let my weakness show, no longer hiding behind the brave facade.

“Zora and Orest could handle it, thrown in Xentar and they’d make this place a paradise.” His chest rumbled, but mine froze as reality weaseled its way back.

“Gideon . . . Zora, she?—”

“I know.” His voice shifted somberly. “Orest spoke with me before his journey back.”

A lingering silence muddied the quiet peace we had carved out for ourselves.

A new day had started, the future was ready to unfold.

We watched the first groups of workers march towards the distant golden wheat fields; their scythes heavy on their shoulders.

Suddenly a forgotten question occurred to me. “What was your end of the bargain with the Soul Eater?”

“Death.”

“What?”

“He recognized me for what I am—a cursed child, the Lord of Death and God of Triumph, and he asked me for death in exchange for keeping your soul tethered on this side of the veil.” We watched from the hill far down in the valleys as horses trailed along an old pathway, carrying empty buggies that were ready to be filled with harvest. “If you were a god, which I had a strong inclination to believe so, then upon your death you’d be summoned to serve, called upon by your duties to answer the cries of those calling your name. There wouldn’t be a white picket fence for you, nor the children you’ve dreamed of, nor a joyous, memorable mortal life. So, I had to ensure that if you faced such grim a reality, you would be able to come back. Granted, that was before I knew of Diamara’s bargain.”

“So you are going to submit him to death?” I wasn’t sure why, but a part of me felt sad. Gideon recognized the slight shift in my voice.

“Forced immortality only sounds great to those who don’t have it. But it’s a curse to see those around you die year after year, to see the world change and dwindle into nothingness replaced by new races and generations. He was cursed by Fate to never feel Death’s touch. And that is the only thing he craves. As the Lord of Death, and God of Triumph, I can arrange such a meeting. Considering he kept his end of the bargain, I am inclined to keep mine.”

The bright round sun illuminated the sky, no longer hiding behind the thin strip of horizon and light reclaimed its power over darkness once again.